3.8competition

增肥UID: 2773671

Quite majority of parents harbor the idea that  learning in schools  is the most vital to teenage, because knowledge in textbooks  is indispensable. However, what are a society need are students contacting the theory from textbooks with experience from part-time jobs. Also, part-time jobs provide students pratical experience, help them build favorable character and familiarize them with contemporary state of their respective fields. Therefore, i extremely believe that one of the way for parents to help teenages prepare for adult life is to encourage them to take a part-time job.

       A popular saying is that experience can rich the life. For my perspective,a part-time job supplying pratical experience is suitable for students preparing future life. If a student want to be a lawyer who need to be created by a great percentage of experience, then parents should help students to take a part-time job. When a student takes a part-time job in lawyer office, they get to know a great many cases at each field like crime law,civil law and economy law. Obviously, to take a part-time job can make students have more concrete understanding on the theory from textbooks.

       Moreover, it is part-time jobs that are able to familiarize students with the contemporary state of their favourite respective fields. On medical, no matter how much theory students realize from textbooks, the theory can not solve all different diseases because of body condition and diseases changing everyday. Without a part-time job joining in medical departments, students can not expect to keep up with steps on medical development. Hence, it is critical for teenage children to take a part-time job.

       Last but not the least, students acknowledging the difficulty of earning money helps them build favorable charater. When parents agree students to take a part-time job,they will think about that it is hard to make money and learn to manage. This kind of habit helps them build a economical character and is beneficial to the whole life.

       In a word,  nothing can compared with the experience we get from part-time jobs. Therefore, taking a part-time job is one of the best ways for parents to help teenages prepare for future life.

annkeUID: 2605122

55555555555.。。word中的颜色都没有了
将就了~
Quite majority of parents harbor the idea that learning in schools is the most vital to teenage, because knowledge in textbooks is indispensable. However, what are a society need are students contacting（combine with更好吧） the theory from textbooks with experience from part-time jobs. Also, part-time jobs provide students pratical（practical） experience, help them build favorable character and familiarize them with contemporary state of their respective fields. Therefore, i（I） extremely believe that one of the way(ways) for parents to help teenages(adj词性，应用teenagers/teenage) prepare for adult life is to encourage them to take a part-time job.

       A popular saying is that experience can rich(richen) the life. For my perspective (from sb's perspective), a part-time job supplying pratical（practical） experience is suitable for students preparing future life. If a student want(wants) to be a lawyer who need to be created by a great percentage of experience, then parents should help students to take a part-time job. When a student takes a part-time job in lawyer office, they get to know a great many cases at each field like crime law, civil law and economy law. Obviously, to take a part-time job can make students have more concrete understanding on the theory from textbooks.

       Moreover, it is part-time jobs that are able to familiarize students with the contemporary state of their favourite(favorite) respective fields. On medical area, no matter how much theory students realize from textbooks, the theory cannot solve all different diseases because of body condition and diseases changing everyday(word语法建议every day,时间状语要分开)(个人觉得这样比较好，theory..solve..这个搭配太中式了。。no matter how much theory students realize from textbooks, they cannot solve all different diseases directly, because body condition and diseases changes every day). Without a part-time job joining in medical departments, students cannot expect to keep up with steps on medical development. Hence, it is critical for teenage children to take a part-time job. !

       Last but not the least, students acknowledging the difficulty of earning money helps them build favorable charater(character). When parents agree students to take a part-time job, they（指代？parents？） will think about that it is hard to make money and learn to manage. This kind of habit helps them build a (an) economical character and is beneficial to the whole life.

       In a word, nothing can compared (compare) with the experience we get from part-time jobs. Therefore, taking a part-time job is one of the best ways for parents to help teenages(adj词性，应用teenagers/teenage) prepare for future life.

bensonseuUID: 2707369

Quite majority of （鄙人没见过这么用的，请教之~~）parents harbor the idea that  learning in schools  is the most vital to teenage, because knowledge in textbooks  is indispensable. However, what are（去掉） a society need are students contacting（connect or connecting?恕我也不知道这里该用哪个。但是要是此句改成what the society need is the ability of connecting `````这个问题就可以避免了，您觉得呢？） the theory from（in） textbooks with experience from part-time jobs. Also, part-time jobs provide students （with）pratical experience, help them build favorable character and familiarize them with contemporary state of their respective fields. Therefore, i extremely believe that one of the way（s） for parents to help teenages prepare for adult life is to encourage them to take a part-time job./ D/ P2 e, Z6 V: L+ D/ h


+ a: c# N/ H7 k9 d! K! X* w
       A popular saying is that experience can rich the life. For my perspective, a part-time job supplying pratical experience is suitable for students preparing（to prepare） future life. If a student want to be a lawyer who need to be created（恕我也没想到什么好词，但是感觉create在这里不太合适） by a great percentage of experience, then parents should help students to take a part-time job. When a student takes a part-time job in lawyer office, they（注意前后一致）
get to know a great many cases at each field like crime law, civil law and economy law. Obviously, to take a part-time job can make students have more concrete understanding on the theory from textbooks.（结尾句不是很有力，因为根据您这段的论证，逻辑上只能得到经验可以使人生更丰富，如果可以把经验和theory再建立起一条联系，这个结尾就更有说服力了。）

0 F) a2 M; z" W
       Moreover, it is part-time jobs that are able to familiarize students with the contemporary state of their favourite respective fields. On medical, no matter how much theory students realize（learn） from textbooks, the theory can not solve all different diseases because of body condition and diseases changing everyday. Without a part-time job joining in medical departments, students can not expect to keep up with steps on medical development. Hence, it is critical for teenage children to take a part-time job.

Last but not the least, students acknowledging the difficulty of earning money helps them build favorable charater. When parents agree students to take a part-time job, they will think about（find out 或者figure out更好点） that it is hard to make money and learn to manage. This kind of habit helps them build a economical character and is beneficial to the whole life./ C, ^* \5 g3 h1 Y  o5 h

  In a word,  nothing can compared with the experience we get from part-time jobs（这句的语法错误想必您一点也就通了，另外我个人建议像这种类似的太绝对化的结论少一点为好，确实说实话，从您的论证得不到，而且我相信也米有人能够论证出这样的结论。）. Therefore, taking a part-time job is one of the best ways for parents to help teenages prepare for future life.

（全篇看来思路还是非常清晰的，要是在论证的力度上再提高一点那就更好了。另外语言上个人认为还有提升的空间，一些语句读起来还是有Chinglish的味道。好了，加油吧！要是鄙人有说的不对的地方还请包涵哈~~）