ISSUE19 请指教 2010-3-16

shohoku11wrjUID: 2731579

ISSUE11"All nations should helpsupport the development of a global university designed to engage students inthe process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."


With the development of society andtechnology, numerous problems appear and become persistent. It is urgent for acountry to address these problems immediately to ensure a better future, and supportingthe researches on pressing social problems is the responsibility of thegovernment, but, it seems to me that not every country has to do these hardtasks as the topic states.

It must be conceded that researches onsocial problems are worthy to all the countries in the world, Such as globalwarming, lack of natural resources, and wars of famine. If these problemsremain without immediate/forthright solvent, ourhomeland, earth and the human society, would be dangerous to develop at ahigher level. What's more, such as the global warming and resources deficiency资源短缺 could destroy the splendid civilizationon the earth if there are not any effective solutionsto impede their further aggravation/exacerbation.In turn, our human lives would shift to a new millennium太平盛世 if some of the stubborn diseases on current society, like contempt for individual right/privilegeand poverty in Africa and Middle East could be cut off.

Admittedly, all these problems areworldwide that they cannot be solved by a single country itself, and then aglobal university will be helpful. Global study and assistance lead variousperspectives on the problems for there are many potential solutions on theprocess all around the world----the nuclear -powered electricity generationtechnology in Francewould be a solution for the nature resources deficiency for instance. On theother hand, some crisis could only be solved through the internationalcooperation, such as the global warming. These problems will remain even ifmost countries approve to stop putting out warming air. They are problems causedin one countries, but influent other countries.

However, it is not necessary for eachcountry to focus their researches on the most persistent problems. One reason Ican easily give out is the cost of global university is too high for mostcountries to afford. Although there are some experts in the tip region/ the forefront of some field of research, it isimpossible for a country which is in the financialshortage to solve its countrywide poverty. Thehigh investment of global researches make the project could only be processedin some particular nations, and they could play the central role when solvingthese problems.

The second reason is some researches arebetter studied in special countries. Take an energy research for example: tidal energyshould be studied in countries with a long coast line, while the inner continental/landlocked/inlandcountries like Polandwill be a ridiculous researching place. Moreover, some persistent socialproblems are just being studied by few professionals. A recent research in MITis focus on keep people from the stationary statue on the chair without anyleisure for more than eight hours every day, and few experts are developing anew computer system which can help them handling official business everywhere. Because of the variety of expert resources and researchconditions, it is impossible for other countries to support their universities onsuch researches.

It can be concluded that the globalresearches on the persistent social problem has a great value for all the humansociety, they are the impetus of the development of human. However, we shouldput the researching resource and weight central point on some specialcountries.

(2010-3-16 12:47:07) 55min

zylpascalUID: 2710054

as the topic states.
Chinglish
改： as stated in the issue.

it seems to me that not 语气不够强 可改为： In my view, it is xxx that(主语从句) // 我喜欢这样用）

It must be conceded that researches onsocial problems are worthy to all(不要用all ，语气绝对化 改为almost every)

Such as globalwarming, lack of natural resources, and wars of famine.（饥荒战争~~~ 同学 请不还要乱造词）

If these problemsremain without immediate/forthright solvent
Remain without –这不是英语，
改：xx remain unsolved all along

would be dangerous to develop at ahigher level ——the developing of the xxx would be in difficulty(ordeal)   学会用名词主语句 名词性成分打头 以及被动结构

In turn, our human lives ----in turn 依次轮流？ 啥意思 /

and then aglobal university will be he   ---and 和 then 最好不要一起出现在开头句 累赘 去掉一个 显的句子更轻


in France？ 日本没有核技术？ 美国没有？ 多余，放在此处

give out----不需out

Thehigh investment of global researches make the project could only be processedin some particular nations, and they could play the central role when solvingthese problems.

强调高投入是的只有富国才搞得起科研吧 所以最好加个only--- only they could play the central role when solvingthese problems

like Polandwill be a ridiculous researching place ---ridiculous 这个词用得太狠了点（波兰人民愤怒了！） 你就我波兰不行就够了吧

Because of the variety of expert resources and researchconditions, it is impossible for other（怎么突然就other了？other的对照物呢？） countries to support their universities on such researches

for all the humansociety,——同学 语法基础啊  形式一致 all 后面可数名词肯定用复数

resources可数 加s

That’s all。

shohoku11wrjUID: 2731579

in turn 在这里表示“ 反之”的意思
其他的没有补充了

对您的细致点评表示非常感谢，暴露了我文章的很多问题。

zylpascalUID: 2710054

没事 呵呵