[66's]同题 Argument146

soilinkinUID: 2163892

argument 146The following appeared in the editorial section of a local newspaper.

"The librarians in our town's school system have reported that the number of trips that our students make to their school library on a voluntary basis has decreased significantly in recent years. For example, the average seventh-grade student visited the school library five times last year, but four of those visits were part of required classroom activities. This shows that our students are reading less than in the past. To address this problem, our town needs to improve the atmosphere of the libraries so that they will be comfortable places in which to work. If students view the libraries as uncomfortable, then they are unlikely to want to spend much time there."




The author of the argument asserts that thelibraries in town should improve their atmosphere to be more comfortablebecause of that students are reading less than before by pointing out thatstudents seldom went to school library. However, the evidence of the author isnot stable enough to prove that students are reading less, moreover, the falsereasoning of the author makes the conclusion that libraries are not comfortableenough not so convincing.

In the first place, the stability of theevidence that trips of students make to school libraries decreased issuspicious. It is said that the average times students went to school librarieslast year was 1, but no data of previous years can prove that the number wasdecreasing. What is more, only students of seventh-grade is mentioned in theargument, it is still uncertain whether the
students in other grade went less to school libraries.

Secondly, even assuming that students goless to school libraries, it does not necessarily means that students arereading less. Admittedly, library is a perfect place for students to read.Nevertheless, besides libraries, there are still many places where students cango to read, classroom, cafe, even bookstore are the places good for reading. Soless trips to libraries does not lead to less reading. Students can loan manybooks from library and read for a long time at other places.

At last, if students are unwilling to go toschool libraries, discomfort will not be the only reason. If libraries are notpreserving enough books, or students are too busy to go to libraries, thenumber of trips students go to libraries will also decrease. The author doesnot provide enough evidence to support the conclusion that school libraries intown are not comfortable enough.

In sum, to make the assertion that studentsare reading less, more persuasive data and evidences should be included.Further more, further investigation of why students are unwilling to go toschool libraries should be made.

zoeyczUID: 2621425

The author of the argument asserts that thelibraries in town should improve their atmosphere to be more comfortablebecause of (because of +n. 加从句的语法上可以么？)that students are reading less than before by pointing out thatstudents seldom went to school library. However, the evidence of the author isnot stable（仍旧觉得stable不太合适） enough to prove that students are reading less, moreover, the falsereasoning of the author makes the conclusion that libraries are not comfortableenough not so convincing.

In the first place, the stability of theevidence that trips of students make to school libraries decreased issuspicious. It is said that the average times students went to school librarieslast year was 1, but no data of previous years can prove that the number wasdecreasing. What is more, only students of seventh-grade is mentioned in theargument, it is still uncertain whether thestudents in other grade went less to school libraries.

Secondly, even assuming that students goless to school libraries, it does not necessarily means that students arereading less. Admittedly, library is a perfect place for students to read.Nevertheless, besides libraries, there are still many places where students cango to read, classroom, cafe, even bookstore are the places good for reading. Soless trips to libraries does not lead to less reading. Students can loan manybooks from library and read for a long time at other places.

At last, if students are unwilling to go toschool libraries, discomfort will not be the only reason. （这句话有点绝对了，我觉得我的理解和你原意有分歧，你想表达的是：如果学生不愿意去图书馆，不舒适并非唯一可能的原因，还有很多其他原因。 但是这个句子我读着的理解是：不舒适不是唯一的原因，还有其他原因。try this: discomfort is not the only possible reason which makes students unwilling to go to school libraries）If libraries are notpreserving enough books, or students are too busy to go to libraries, thenumber of trips students go to libraries will also decrease. The author doesnot provide enough evidence to support the conclusion that school libraries intown are not comfortable enough.

In sum, to make the assertion that studentsare reading less, more persuasive data and evidences should be included.Further more, further investigation of why students are unwilling to go toschool libraries should be made.