argument212~~严格限时第二篇~~有拍必回

ella_dylUID: 2595060

TOPIC: ARGUMENT212 - The following appeared in a memorandum from the new president of the Patriot car manufacturing company.

"In the past, the body styles of Patriot cars have been old-fashioned, and our cars have not sold as well as have our competitors' cars. But now, since many regions in this country report rapid increases in the numbers of newly licensed drivers, we should be able to increase our share of the market by selling cars to this growing population. Thus, we should discontinue our oldest models and concentrate instead on manufacturing sporty cars. We can also improve the success of our marketing campaigns by switching our advertising to the Youth Advertising agency, which has successfully promoted the country's leading soft drink."

WORDS: 494        TIME: 00:30:00     DATE: 2010-3-25 上午 10:47:15

In this memo, the president of the Patriot car advocates that they should discontinue their oldest models and concentrate instead on manufacturing sporty cars. To justify this claim, the president cites that the old-fashioned body styles of Patriot cars has attributed to their market loss. Also, the president believes that they can improve the success of their marketing campaigns by switching their advertising to the Youth Advertising agency, which has succeeded in the soft drinking promotion. Although this argument seems reasonable at first glance, it is in fact ill-conceived.

To begin with, the president unfairly assumes that the old-fashioned body style is attributable to the loss of market share. In fact, many factors, such as price, quality, safety, and oil consumption can be the causes of the present situation. Perhaps the quality and safety of Patriot cars are inferior to their competitors' cars. Quality is always considered by most consumers as the most important factor. If Patriot cars are poor in quality, it is highly possible for consumers to choose other cars, even if prices of Patriot cars are lower. Moreover, considering the serious consequence of car accidents, safety is also a significant factor influencing consumers' choices. Therefore, without ruling out all these possibilities, a simple change of body styles can not improve the sales of Patriot cars.

Furthermore, the increase numbers of newly licensed drives in many regions does not necessarily lead to the increase of market share of sporty cars. First, we are not informed that if these new drivers will certainly purchase cars. Considering the cost in many aspects, it is entirely possible they rent a car instead of buying one. Even if they will buy cars, there's no information telling us that they all prefer new-styled cars, especially sporty cars. There is no evidence that the old-fashioned cars have lost its entire market. Perhaps the low price and low oil-consumption of old-fashioned cars are more popular in new drivers. Thus, it is too hasty for the president to draw such conclusion.

Additionally, the president makes a false analogy when choosing the advertising agency. The promotion between car and soft drink can be totally different. Since cars are usually bought-once products while soft drinks make repeated buying, the success of promotion in soft drinks can not applied to cars directly. Moreover, due to the higher cost, advertising does not seem as important as it is in soft drink selling. In most cases, consumers will take more consideration before they choose products from one company.

To sum up, the conclusion reached in this argument is invalid and misleading. To strengthen this argument, the president should provide more convincing evidence to prove that it is the old-fashioned body style---not other factors---that leads to the decrease of market share. Moreover, it is strongly recommended that Patriot car manufacturing company should conduct a survey to have a comprehensive understanding about the needs of potential consumers. Afterwards, the president’s decision can be more persuasive.

番茄斗斗UID: 2720914

"Inthe past, the body styles of Patriot cars have been old-fashioned, andour cars have not sold as well as have our competitors' cars. But now,since many regions in this country report rapid increases in thenumbers of newly licensed drivers, we should be able to increase ourshare of the market by selling cars to this growing population. Thus,we should discontinue our oldest models and concentrate instead onmanufacturing sporty cars. We can also improve the success of ourmarketing campaigns by switching our advertising to the YouthAdvertising agency, which has successfully promoted the country'sleading soft drink."

WORDS: 494        TIME: 00:30:00     DATE: 2010-3-25 上午 10:47:15

Inthis memo, the president of the Patriot car advocates that they shoulddiscontinue their oldest models and concentrate instead onmanufacturing sporty cars. To justify this claim, the president citesthat the old-fashioned body styles of Patriot cars has attributed totheir market loss. Also, the president believes that they can improvethe success of their marketing campaigns by switching their advertisingto the Youth Advertising agency, which has succeeded in the softdrinking promotion. Although this argument seems reasonable at firstglance, it is in fact ill-conceived.（过于复述性的开头）

Tobegin with, the president unfairly assumes that the old-fashioned bodystyle is attributable to the loss of market share. In fact, manyfactors, such as price, quality, safety, and oil consumption can be thecauses of the present situation. Perhaps the quality and safety ofPatriot cars are inferior to their competitors' cars. Quality is alwaysconsidered by most consumers as the most important factor. If Patriotcars are poor in quality, it is highly possible for consumers to chooseother cars, even if prices of Patriot cars are lower. Moreover,considering the serious consequence of car accidents, safety is also asignificant factor influencing consumers' choices（这一句有些累赘，既然之前已经就QUALITY细述了的话，若SAFETY没有特别的地方，就没有必要再提出来，而何况这里你仅仅再次重复了之前提及的可能，有凑字数的嫌疑）. Therefore, withoutruling out all these possibilities, a simple change of body styles cannot improve the sales of Patriot cars.

Furthermore,the increase numbers of newly licensed drives in many regions does notnecessarily lead to the increase of market share of sporty cars. First,we are not informed that if these new drivers will certainly purchasecars. Considering the cost in many aspects, it is entirely possiblethey rent a car instead of buying one. Even if they will buy cars,there's no information telling us that they all prefer new-styled cars,especially sporty cars. There is no evidence that the old-fashionedcars have lost its entire market. Perhaps the low price and lowoil-consumption of old-fashioned cars are more popular in new drivers.Thus, it is too hasty for the president to draw such conclusion.这里你的攻击方式是：新司机可能只会租车->即使买车不一定买跑车->老式车不一定没市场；个人认为没有攻击到点上，为什么题目上会说是跑车呢，因为是它给了特定的人群--新司机，所以个人理解为它的漏洞在于默认了新司机=年轻人=>年轻人喜欢跑车，你觉得这样的攻击会不会更好点呢？）

Additionally,the president makes a false analogy when choosing the advertisingagency. The promotion between car and soft drink can be totallydifferent. Since cars are usually bought-once products while softdrinks make repeated buying, the success of promotion in soft drinkscan not applied to cars directly. Moreover, due to the higher cost,advertising does not seem as important as it is in soft drink selling（这一点我不认同哦，营销对于消费品来说更重要）.In most cases, consumers will take more consideration before theychoose products from one company.

Tosum up, the conclusion reached in this argument is invalid andmisleading. To strengthen this argument, the president should providemore convincing evidence to prove that it is the old-fashioned bodystyle---not other factors---that leads to the decrease of market share.Moreover, it is strongly recommended that Patriot car manufacturingcompany should conduct a survey to have a comprehensive understandingabout the needs of potential consumers. Afterwards, the president’sdecision can be more persuasive.