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[i习作temp] 【Flyer杀G作文组】6.22-Issue50-By CC [复制链接]

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发表于 2010-6-23 22:17:56 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
本帖最后由 师大菜菜 于 2010-6-26 22:54 编辑

Issue 50:
In order to improve the quality of instruction at the college and university level, all faculty should be required to spend more time working outside the academic world in professions relevant to the courses they teach.


提纲:
1.
对于一个工程应用性的专业,老师出去工作确实可以改善教学质量。

2.
但是并不所有的员工都要出去工作,对于很多专业这并不适合

3.
另外,即使是对于一个实践性很强的专业,出去工作也不一定会改善教学质量

3.1
出去工作占用老师大量时间
3.2
过分强调公司要求,可能使学生忽略基本知识



The speaker asserts that all faculty should be required to spend more time working outside the academic world for the reason that working outside can improve the quality of instruction of their courses. As far as I concerned, working outside the campus do bring a lot advantages, but it is not necessary required all faculty to spend their time working outside campus. We also are aware of the negative aspects of working outside for faculty.

I concede that it is necessary in modern society that professors, especially those in engineering , have the experience of working outside academic world. Through working outside, they can gain more practical experience and know more about the requirement of enterprises. With those experience and knowledge, they can give students special instructions  in their courses to suit them better for the future careers. At present, most courses in colleges are too out-of-date to meet the requirements of enterprises. On a survey by Chinese government in 2008 asserts that in China more than 82.5% of the companies in Information technology field could not find suitable workers. A half of companies complained that most graduates whose majors are information technology don’t master the fundamental practical skills in the field. As a result, these companies prefer hiring people from society who have working experience rather than graduates who need be trained for a long time, even if the former people require high salaries. Therefore, if professors can give students more instructions on the practical skills which are based on their working experience, students may easily find a good job.


However, it is not a wise idea to require all faculty to work outside disregard their special major situations. We should recognize that there are little practical works related to some pure theory majors such as mathematic and theoretical physics. What should to do by professors in these majors are do their research and try their best to explain the theories clearly. Working in professions relevant to the courses they teach is not only wasting time but also infeasible. Let alone to improve the quality of their instructions.

Last but not least, even for the professors whose major is very practical such as engineering, working outside the academic world may still have some negative effects. Firstly, working outside would occupy large portion of professors’ time. College professors’ basic duties are teaching students and doing research. Working outside might distract some teachers’ attention from their basic jobs. As far as I concerned, the payments one person can get in some international companies is almost five times higher than a professor salary in the university. Therefore if professors are attracted by the high salaries, and pay less attention to work in university, the quality of the instruction would descend. All students will suffer for it. What’s more, even professors would not be distracted, and give students many suggestions about what is the company require most at present. The suggestions do not necessarily improve their teaching quality. Because the courses in college should help students lay a solid foundation for their future. If professors placed too much emphasis on the current requirement of corporations which are updated quickly, students might see little value on fundamental knowledge and just follow the volatile requirement of corporations. That’s very harmful for the development of students.

To sum up, working outside may can improve the quality of instruction to some extent, but we should hold rational attitude toward it. We must take account for the cost of time and the situation of special major.


说明:
   花了挺长时间的,还是边查资料边写。要多背一些范文,争取下一篇文章可以不查资料就写出来。
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发表于 2010-6-24 18:35:35 |只看该作者
给小孩加油

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板凳
发表于 2010-6-25 03:01:50 |只看该作者
I concede that it is necessary in modern society that professors, especially those in engineering working outside.

->Grammar mistake here.

With those experience and knowledge, they can give students more instructions in their courses.

->前面已经写了两次more,这里可以落实到更具体的地方,对应你提到的业界的要求这里可以改成
Teachers can provide students specific instructions in course to suit them better for the future careers. 不过这里是个小问题。

论点都还行,注意一下正文第一段跟第三段,有些互相冲突。你写第三段的时候,主题句改成:即使对于工程学的教师来说,在学术以外的范围花太多时间也是不好的。你要强调一下too much time/energy这一点。

文章不错,没什么大毛病。
色不迷人人自迷。
天佑中华!!Bless bless bless

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地板
发表于 2010-6-25 03:02:19 |只看该作者
另外 下次贴上来字体放大一点就更好了 谢谢:)
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发表于 2010-6-26 22:35:14 |只看该作者
本帖最后由 师大菜菜 于 2010-6-26 22:37 编辑
I concede that it is necessary in modern society that professors, especially those in engineering working outside.

->Grammar mistake here.

With those experience and knowledge, they can give stu ...
yogurt4 发表于 2010-6-25 03:01


羊羊版主指教的是,大驾光临,倍感荣幸
I concede that it is necessary in modern society that professors, especially those in engineering working outside.
改成:
I concede that it is necessary in modern society that professors,especially those in engineering, have the experience of working outside academic world.

->前面已经写了两次more,这里可以落实到更具体的地方,对应你提到的业界的要求这里可以改成
Teachers can provide students specific instructions in course to suit them better for the future careers.
是的,XDF老师也说,要尽量写得具体一些,不要泛泛而论,套用模板句型



论点都还行,注意一下正文第一段跟第三段,有些互相冲突。你写第三段的时候,主题句改成:即使对于工程学的教师来说,在学术以外的范围花太多时间也是不好的。你要强调一下too much time/energy这一点。
同意,主要是只写 too much time/energy, 怕字数不够,我该查一些国外调查的数据,列出就可以了。进行中....



文章不错,没什么大毛病。

谢谢鼓励,文章还是套用范文,都怕被雷同...,呵呵,慢慢改进

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发表于 2010-6-27 00:38:12 |只看该作者
羊羊版主指教的是,大驾光临,倍感荣幸
I concede that it is necessary in modern society that professors, especially those in engineering working outside.
改成:
I concede that it is necessary in  ...
师大菜菜 发表于 2010-6-26 22:35



对,不管是issue还是argu,都要避免general information,  尽量往实处写。
家长都来了,要特别加油^^
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