scarlett的作文贴

scarlett-zUID: 2722333

Date:7.6
Topic:It is more important to reserve land for human beings than for endangered animals.

It is more important to reserve land for human beings than for endangered animals. The earth has limited resources, human beings, as the dominator of the world, have the responsibility to make the earth better.
Land is important to the living things. Human beings and the animals are sharing the limited land on the earth. As the world population increasing, it has become more crowded on the street, in the stores, and especially the housing area. So it is more important for us to reserve land. Besides, we can use the land more efficient, and improve the living quality of ourselves. Of course, we can also provide comfortable living conditions for the animals. We can apply our modern technology to build a better ecological environment, which may benefit both animals and human beings.
Nowadays, we have realized the correlation between the animals and human beings, and we have paid much more attention to the environmental protection, in order to keep ecological balance. In my opinion, the key point is not who need the land, but rather the awareness of the natural balance. Whether we leave the land for the endangered animals or not, it will not completely change the living condition. What the endangered animals faced is not only the land problem, but other factors, such as pollution, hunting, is also affecting them.
Human beings and the animals should be friends, reserving land for ourselves to make a better life for all the living things, if we live in peace with animals, then it will not be a problem of who we should reserve land for.

onlybenUID: 2842362

It is more important to reserve land for human beings than for endangered animals. The earth has limited resources, human beings, as the dominator of the world, have the responsibility to make the earth better./ m7 b( X' j&
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Land is important to the living things. Human beings and the animals are sharing the limited land on the earth. As the world population increasing, it has become more crowded on the street, in the stores, and especially the housing area. So it is more important(urgent?替换一下，因为前面用过importan?) for us to reserve land. Besides, we can use the land more efficient(是不是副词？我问问，水平比较差), and improve the living quality of ourselves. Of course, we can also provide comfortable living conditions for the animals. We can apply our modern technology to build a better ecological environment, which may benefit both animals and human beings. ; s  @! r1 t3
e$ v3 K, A/ C
Nowadays, we have realized the correlation between the animals and human beings, and we have paid much more attention to the environmental protection, in order to keep ecological balance. In my opinion, the key point is not who needs the land, but rather the awareness of the natural balance. Whether we leave the land for the endangered animals or not, it will not completely change the living condition. What the endangered animals faced is not only the land problem, but other factors, such as pollution, hunting, is also affecting them. ' @0 l& d& M  ^4 g
_/ X  i
Human beings and the animals should be friends, reserving land for ourselves to make a better life for all the living things, if we live in peace with animals, then it will not be a problem of who we should reserve land for.  z, _$ H- x2 n; g! t! J

我觉得第二段写的蛮好，八股文看多了，还是希望第二段一开头就有个明确的分论点。还有就是同组的另外一个战友也是两段论，我喜欢这样的结构，这样可以把话说的更具体，如果可能的话我希望战友在时间允许范围内再写个小段落，因为字数上面我和战友一样都是300零一点点，所以感觉还是再多一点字比较充实，三段论还是经典一点。小的语法错误还是希望战友注意一下下~HiaHia

PS：战友你的逻辑点都很高明，佩服一下

scarlett-zUID: 2722333

7.13  

It’s better to watch serious movies that help people think than to watch movies that could amuse and entertain people

Movies, as a sort of entertainment of public, are playing an important role in people’s lives. From the silent movie of Chaplin to today’s IMAX film, modern movies have changed greatly in the operation, content, art form and the acting style. However, the film makers always want to express something though the film. They believe the audience will think about the truth that the story has conveyed. That’s the key point. No matter what kind the film is, serious movies or entertainment ones, it contains the thoughts of the writer and the director, thus movies that amuse and entertain people don’t means they are meaningless.
Life is colorful, and we all have gone through happiness and sadness. Everything has its practical significance. The directors apply varied skills to do their movies, and shoot from various angles to express their ideas. On the one side, watching the serious movies may make the audience easier to think of the story, because of the writing techniques, the shooting skills and the atmosphere created in the movies. On the other side, movies that amuse and entertain people can also make sense. Besides, not all the people watch movies for the purpose to learn and think, a certain part of the audience just need relax and release stress by watching those simple and amusing movies, they wants to laugh, and forget the unhappiness in their work and life.
From my point of view, I would love to watch the movies that can inspire me to further effort. Sometimes, I will choose the Oscar awarded films, like ‘The Curious Case of Benjamin Button’, the reversion of a man’s life, how curious it is! While sometimes, movies concerning the youth and the campus life are more attractive to me. For example, the famous movie produced by Disney Channel, ‘High School Musical’, describing the students’ study life in the high school, the leading actor, Troy neither disappointed his friends, nor gave up his dream pursuing, he became a joyful and self-confident person. By watching this delighting movie, I understand that when you do anything, don’t be influenced by other factors that result in your unsatisfactory in the competition. Only facing the reality, you can get the result that you hoped. By the way, the music in the movie sounds great. It’s certainly not a serious movie.
In a word, everyone has his own understanding of a movie, perhaps a tiny detail means something to somebody. No matter what style the movie is, whether it is meaningful or not depends on your attitude and aim of watching the movie. After all, telling a truth should not always be serious, laugher values as well.

伶女UID: 2797207

7.13FEEDBACK BY 伶女


Movies, as a sort of entertainment of public, are playing an important role in people’s lives. From the silent movie of Chaplin to today’s IMAX film, modern movies have changed greatly in the operation, content, art form and the acting style. However, the film makers always want to express something through the film. They believe the audience will think about the truth是真相呢，换成phenomenon好不好～ that the story has conveyed. That’s the key point. No matter what kind the film is, serious movies or entertainment ones, it contains the thoughts of the writer and the director, thus movies that amuse and entertain people don’t means they are meaningless.
Life is colorful, and we all have gone through happiness and sadness. Everything has its practical significance.前面的话有点空，像中国人写文章喜欢先虚几句，你可以直接说不同电影有不同的看点～ The directors apply varied skills to do their movies, and shoot from various angles to express their ideas. On the one side, watching the serious movies may make the audience easier to think of the story, because of the writing techniques, the shooting skills（writing skills and shoot techniques） and the atmosphere created in the movies. On the other side, movies that amuse and entertain people can also make sense. Besides, not all the people watch movies for the purpose to learn and think, a certain part of the audience just need relax and release stress by watching those simple and amusing movies, they wants to laugh, and forget the unhappiness in their work and life. ) X. {0 H0 b/ e$ ^$ T9 O4 a
From my point of view, I would love to watch the movies that can inspire me to further effort. Sometimes, I will choose the Oscar awarded films, like ‘The Curious Case of Benjamin Button’, the reversion of a man’s life, how curious it is! While sometimes, movies concerning the youth and the campus life are more attractive to me. For example, the famous movie produced by Disney Channel, ‘High School Musical’, describing the students’ study life in the high school, the leading actor, Troy neither disappointed his friends, nor gave up his dream pursuing, he became a joyful and self-confident person. By watching this delighting movie, I understand that when you do anything, don’t be influenced by other factors that result in your unsatisfactory in the competition. Only facing the reality, you can get the result that you hoped. By the way, the music in the movie sounds great. It’s certainly not a serious movie.歌舞青春的例子很好呢，拿自己来说也很具体有说服力～1 w) `9歌舞青春 a$ L2 Q
In a word, everyone has his own understanding of a movie, perhaps a tiny detail means something to somebody. No matter what style the movie is, whether it is meaningful or not depends on your attitude and aim of watching the movie. After all, telling a truth should not always be serious, laugher values as well.

整篇文章很流畅，写的并不是特别深刻但是却很完整～ 学习～

scarlett-zUID: 2722333

对啊，我写文章就是深刻不了啊~~不知道咋改~

scarlett-zUID: 2722333

7.15 People should live in the city or country all life instead of moving to another place

Mankind has a deep believe in the conception of home, hometown and family complex means a lot to us. Many people would love to live in their country all life, especially the old. However, as a young, I prefer to move now and then, looking around the world, if I have the time and money.
In the modern society, with the development of the communication technique and transportation facilities, it is more convenient for people to move from one place to another. Although moving could bring some trouble, it is worthy of. You can live in different enviroment, meet different people, and learn various cultures. Moreover, moving around can broaden your vision and extend your circle of friends. Whatever reason that makes you to move, you need to be accustomed to the change of your life style and habit, which may strengthen your adaptability as well.
Every place has its distinctive characteristic. The local people, customs and cultures brings you into a new life. When you are in a place never have been to, you can foget the past, making a fresh start. Besides, if you live in a totally different way, and contact with all sorts of people, your philosophy and values may also be influenced in a new enviroment
Live an easy life is what we expect. But staying in one place all life is not fit for everyone. Hometown is unique to everyone, wherever you go, it can’t be denied. However, each place you have stayed for a time can be your home if you have affection for the place. In a word, the world is one big family.

fanfan1247UID: 2591669

修改好了~~~~~~~~
请查看吧~~~~~~~~
fanfan1247修改scarlett 7.15.doc (22.5 KB, 下载次数: 3)

2010-7-16 00:41:39 上传

下载次数: 3

欢迎互相讨论~~

mollymollymollyUID: 2839509

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Mankind has a deep believe in the conception of home, hometown and family complex 啥成分  副词 ？means 第三人称 a lot to us. Many people would love to live in their country all life, especially the old. However, as a young, I prefer to move now and then, looking around the world, if I have the time and money.
% @6 z( m) H( f) _  j; X7 PIn the modern society, with the development of the communication technique and transportation facilities, it is more convenient for people to move from one place to another. Although moving could bring some trouble, it is worthy of. You can live in different enviroment, meet different people, and learn various cultures. Moreover, moving around can broaden your vision and extend your circle of friends. Whatever reason that makes you to move, you need to be accustomed to the change of your life style and habit, which may strengthen your adaptability as well. (PS 个人建议 最好观点明确提在段首 把那个方便啥的放第一段去 可能会更好哦)
0 k. r0 ^9 l, s# b  _7 i1 E+ tEvery place has its distinctive characteristic. The local people, customs and cultures brings you into a new life. When you are in a place never have been to, you can foget the past, making a fresh start. Besides, if you live in a totally different way, and contact with all sorts of people, your philosophy and values may also be influenced in a new enviroment
% a, h- u/ c8 i1 SLive an easy life is what we expect. But staying in one place all life is not fit for everyone. Hometown is unique to everyone, wherever you go, it can’t be denied.抽象了点 However, each place you have stayed for a time can be your home if you have affection for the place. In a word, the world is one big family.
既然字数没有写完就 不对那个结构作评价 了  楼主可以先慢慢练 不用卡时间 唯一觉得论点不是很鲜明