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[未归类] julianlod 写作贴 大家请指教~ [复制链接]

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荣誉版主 枫华正茂 枫情万种

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发表于 2010-8-25 00:05:43 |只看该作者
8.24 综合写作
The reading passage claims that wood companies in the United States would not like to achieve ecocertification for several reasons. However, this assertion is strongly challenge by the lecture which provides drastically different points.

The speaker begins by pointing out that the Americans do not treat every advertisement same, they believe that the companies advertise their products with the ecocertificaiton because of their confidence in the product. Also, the Americans are favored in the products with a certification of an independent agency, especially with international reputation. This evidence disagrees with the standpoint demonstrated in the reading materials.

Then the lecturer goes on to maintain that it is undeniable that everyone cares about price, but the price is not the only factor of the consumers’ determination of wood products. Only when one product’s price is much higher than the other ones, they will consider it. But when the price difference below 5 percent, they will care other factors, such as ecocertification, because Americans have a high value of protection of environment. Therefore, the lecturer goes on against what is presented in the reading passage.

Finally, the lecture also opposes to the writer’s view by providing the fact that most wood companies capture this ecocertification not for attracting the foreign customers, but for competing with the foreign wood. If the American wood companies achieve this certification much slower than the foreign companies, the foreign ones will quickly occupy the domestic market.

In sum, all the three evidences of the lecture illustrate that the speaker disagrees with the points mentioned in the article.

interated writing 7 tpo.doc

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发表于 2010-8-25 09:03:01 |只看该作者
I have already revised your writing

interated_writing_7_tpo revised.doc

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不放弃,不灰心

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发表于 2010-8-25 09:56:51 |只看该作者
here are the compositions of yesterday

10 revised.doc

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8.23_TPO6revised.doc

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不放弃,不灰心

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发表于 2010-8-25 14:00:08 |只看该作者
加油加油!!

RE interated writing 7 tpo.doc

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发表于 2010-8-25 14:06:07 |只看该作者
改好了!

0824 julian 改 by frlender.doc

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荣誉版主 枫华正茂 枫情万种

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发表于 2010-8-25 16:07:45 |只看该作者
35# frlender
恩 楼主很敏感的嗅觉啊 这是我考完G之后写的第一篇T的作文 没摆脱G的影响 这是前几天写过的文章贴过来请大家改正的 仔细看了你的建议 很conducive

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发表于 2010-8-25 16:08:57 |只看该作者
独立写作24号的作业改好了

改1.doc

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发表于 2010-8-25 22:57:49 |只看该作者
独立已改

8-24-newspapers and magazines are the best ways.doc

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发表于 2010-8-25 23:59:25 |只看该作者
已改

824 独立 julianlod.doc

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发表于 2010-8-26 00:23:51 |只看该作者
综合

interated writing 7 tpo julianlod.doc

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荣誉版主 枫华正茂 枫情万种

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发表于 2010-8-28 02:58:40 |只看该作者
8.27 综合写作 TPO10
The reading passage claims that the environmental pollution is more likely to cause the rapid declination of sea otter population. However, this assumption is strongly challenged by the lecture which believes the predation hypothesis.

The lecture begins by pointing out the fact that hardly can we find dead otter washed on shore of Alaskan coast. If the life-threatening infections cause the death of otters, there will be a lot of death otters on the shore. On the other hand, if the otters are predated, it is clear that no sea otters are washed on the shore.

Then the lecturer goes on to maintain that an accumulating number of whales are hunted by human being, therefore, the orca has to change their diet. Owing to only small animals are available, it is inevitable lead to the declination of their population, such as seals, sea lions, also sea otters. So the lecture continues to against what is presented in the article.

Finally, the lecture also opposes to the experts’ assumption by presenting the standpoint that the uneven pattern of otter decrease also supports the predation theory. Because the orca can only access the some Alaskan locations, it will explain the greatly declination of otter population in that area, while the shallow and rocky locations’ population remain stable.

In sum, all the three evidences of the lecture illustrate that the speaker disagrees with the point maintained in the reading passage.

integrated writing 10.doc

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荣誉版主 枫华正茂 枫情万种

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发表于 2010-8-28 03:21:20 |只看该作者
8.27 综合写作
University students should take part-time jobs.(Education & Work)
In recent years, an increasingly number of students takes part-time jobs while they are still studying at university. When asked about whether students should have jobs or not during their campus lives, quite a few citizens hold the negative standpoint by arguing that it is undeniable that taking a part-time job will exert an adverse effect on their acquiring knowledge with full of their hearts. However, each coin has its two sides; others believe that students ought to have jobs, considering that the financial burdens of the students and putting theories into practice. As for me, I completely agree with the latter idea.

The first and foremost reason for having jobs is that it will alleviate the students’ financial burden considerably. By taking some part-time jobs they will make some money for their tuition and basic allowances. Through this, they could know that money cannot be earned easily and train their characteristic of frugality. We may quote a well-known example of Bill Gates, one of billionaires all over the world. He used the money that he had earned from part-time job to pay for the tuition of Harvard University. It makes him a frugal man that always dresses himself old jeans and tennis shoes in his daily life, although he is the richest man in the world.

What is also worth to noticing is that integrating theory to practice is result by taking part-time jobs. Now that the opportunity of attending universities is precious, we not only need to acquire knowledge, but also should gain some skills in practice simultaneously. Being faced with the new opportunities and challenges in 21st century, we should integrate the knowledge we acquired from textbook with practice. What’s more, according to an authoritative sociological study has found that in this plural society, it is working experience that plays a crucial role when we hunting for a job opportunity after graduation.  

To the extent, it is indisputable that having jobs while they are still students has numerous benefits. On the other hand, we seem to fail to take into account the basic fact that students’ part-time job is bringing us a lot of drawbacks. A good case in point is the negative effects on their studying. As spending too much time in having part-time job, they cannot focus their entire time and energy on the studying at class. Being a student, he should give priority to acquiring knowledge. Considerable drawbacks though having jobs leads to, they cannot compete with the benefits that it brings about.

To sum up, given those reasons which were discussed above, I firmly commit to the notion that it is essential for university students to take part-time jobs while they study at university. Furthermore, it could be better that the well-organized timetable about part-time job and studying should be drafted.

这还是很久以前写的了 写过就不想重写了 然后仔细修改了一下 大家见谅

14.doc

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发表于 2010-8-28 11:30:21 |只看该作者
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发表于 2010-8-28 18:26:29 |只看该作者
本帖最后由 longxue26 于 2010-8-28 18:35 编辑

42# Julianlod

修改完了

BTW, 我觉得议论的部分 不是特别有力和恳切, but 你的词汇和句式的精彩貌似cover住这方面了

14revised by yuki.doc

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发表于 2010-8-28 18:34:41 |只看该作者
41# Julianlod

改好了!

integrated writing 10 revised by yuki.doc

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我想我可以的!是一定可以的!是一定一定不错的!

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RE: julianlod 写作贴 大家请指教~ [修改]

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