樾悦 独立写作文贴c

樾悦UID: 2689181

9月7日交( Q( D$ h: ~1 x0 m/ ^; \* w
2009.8.7 NA  是否同意 parents help determined the future of their children or children allow to make their own choices.
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Some people believe that it is better for children make their future decisions themselves. However I disagree with it. I am inclined to that parents should make these decisions .
Initially, parents know us best because they almost accompany with as untill we are becoming adults. In one aspect, they are always there to nourish our interest and explore our potential. They play a significant role in our daily life. So they know which subject we fit and which job we are qualified for. In another aspect, some people may believe that parents will kill children’s interest, but they may ignore that seldom parents will force children to do what they really dislike. What parents want is using their best abilities to combine with children’s interest and their future development.
Further leading credence to my position is the fact that parents have more experiments. We are all scared about making a wrong decision and regreting in the rest of our lives. Maybe what parents do is not all correct , however , at least better than us. They were already suffered what we will come through and then to predict what difficulties we may encounter with. In their determinations they will avoid some unfortunately happen.
Ultimately, parents’ decisions are always considered all sides included social needs individual development. Children determinations are always considered more about themselves.  
Admittedly, children make their own choice may bring passion and interest and it seems easier to access success. However this is not the whole story, the merits about parents decisions that I have mentioned above overwhelm its risks. Therefore, I still stand on my position that let your parents help you determined your future.

樾悦UID: 2689181

我写得脑袋都大了   
刚刚加入你们  也是第一次用电脑写作文  打字超慢 时间自然超了。。。  自己作文是一大弱项。。
哪位点子不好的仁兄不小心分到我了 就不用客气 大改吧~   
大概11月第一次考托 不知道练得起来不？？？
万一人品爆发 托福不小心过了必将感激不尽~

melodyfeelingsUID: 2855338

LZ语言还要加强哦~平时可以多阅读些老外的文章然后积累一些好句子结构和好单词。
另外，每段的论点展开的还不够充分哦~可以多写一些的~~
加油啦！

樾悦UID: 2689181

3# melodyfeelings
  额  ~　就这么点点　～ 能不能改细一点~  我不怎么明白呢~

樾悦UID: 2689181

2009.9.19 NA  Government should more support art museum and music performance than recreational facilities, such as swimming pool or play ground.%


　


From my perspective, art museum and music performance, or recreational facilities, is an essential part of our lives, and therefore, goverment should banlance with art museum and recreational facilities.

Initially, art museum and music performance is good for our mental health. When we fell exhausted and boring after daily work, we can go to some museum or music centre accompanying with our friend or family. children can boarden their horizon and adults find real relaxation at the same time. Say my family always like to go to museum where in the center of my hometown.
We all attracted by some fantasic panting and handicraft. My parents also tell me some background about the exhibition. That’s a family time when talk to each other, especially days of hard work and study.

However , if we take more attention to these museum and music center but ignored to develop recreational facilities what will our life be like? There will be a downtrend in our body health I think.

So, recreational facilities is as important as art museum. Just like of equal importance is our physical heath, recreation facilities are a place to do some exercise. I like swimming, it brings me a big fun. After weeks of swimming I find it almost helped me to lose 10 weight without going on a diet. I feel interesting whenever I do this , and only in these way I can enjoy my life greatly!

To sum up, Government should support art museum and recreational facilities at same time if they want to create a happy and civilized society.

樾悦UID: 2689181

2009.9.11NA  agree or disagree it is only worth watching movies that can teach us something about real life$ Z2 a, C9 T. m, Q6 C8 y7 m2 x

  Whether worth watching movies just like some educational value movies or documentary is the only way to learn the real life seems to be a complex and controversial topic in this civilized society. While some people may agree with it because they believe that movies are fantastic, so fantastic it is that we could just need to concentrate on the screen to see what will the story going on. However, I disagree with it. From my piont of view, we can obtain knowledge about real life though books 、education and our own experience.
Initially, books promote mental development for us. When I was a little child, my parents always show some story books, containing various kind of pictures which, directly or indirectly,  reflected the environment around me. Hardly can I resist the temptation of it. My mother often read one chapter to me before I sleep. I feel a big fun when I was listening, and in this way I can recognize real life efficiently.
Further leading credence to my position is the fact that it is education also exercise a profound influence on our cognition. When we at seven years old, our parents sent us to the primary school. We continue studying for about ten years even more. In the school, teachers not only teach us the knowledge in the books, but also tell us how to be a real men who should have self-confident and never give up. I think education is the foundation before we experience society, let us deeply understand what real life is and how to deal with some difficulties.
Ultimately, our own experience force us to practise the tedious and happiness in life. When we are working, we will know life is full of tribulation and adversity which just right here wait us to conquer, and therefore, we will experience something about right and wrong which contained in real life.
Admittedly, this is not the whole story. Movies can exhibit real life in a efficient and effective way. However, this is not the only method we can know real life because of another three way I have mentioned above. Therefore, I still stand on my point that worth watching movies is not the only way that can teach us something about real life.

执着的丸子UID: 2626299

Whether worth watching movies(感觉很奇怪、、、) just like some educational value movies or documentary is the only way to learn the real life seems to be a complex and controversial topic in this civilized society. While some people may agree with it because they believe that movies are fantastic, so fantastic it is that we could just need to concentrate on the screen to see what will the story going on.（前半句的逻辑和后半句貌似没啥因果关系啊、、、） However, I disagree with it. From my piont（point） of view, we can obtain knowledge about real life though books 、（英语里面没有顿号，用逗号）education and our own experience.
dInitially（用这里不恰当，这个更偏近初始的意思）, books promote mental development for us. When I was a little child, my parents always show some story books, containing various kinds of pictures which, directly or indirectly,  reflected(s) the environment around me. Hardly can I resist the temptation of it. My mother often read one chapter to me before I sleep. I feel a big fun when I was listening, and in this way I can recognize real life efficiently.
Further leading credence to my position is the fact that it is education also exercise a profound influence on our cognition. When we at seven years old, our parents sent us to the primary school. We continue studying for about ten years(, and) even more. In the school, teachers not only teach us the knowledge in the books, but also tell us how to be a real man who should have self-confident and never give up. I think education is the foundation before we experience society, (and it注意主语)let us deeply understand what real life is and how to deal with some difficulties.
Ultimately, our own experience force us to practise（experience） the tedious and happiness in life. When we are working, we will know life is full of tribulation and adversity which just right here wait us to conquer, and therefore, we will experience something about right and wrong which contained in real life.（还是前后半句逻辑关系不太对劲）
Admittedly, this is not the whole story.（这句话过度不太自然） Movies can exhibit real life in an efficient and effective way. However, this is not the only method we can know real life because of (there are) another three ways (exist) I have mentioned above. Therefore, I still stand on my point that worth watching movies is not the only way that can teach us something about real life.

kimi海纳UID: 2855420

改完了~晚了SORRY

樾悦UID: 2689181

8# kimi海纳

谢谢~~~~~~~

樾悦UID: 2689181

2009.9.19 NA  Government should more support art museum and music performance than recreational facilities, such as swimming pool or play ground.% 　 From my perspective, art museum and music performance, or recreational facilities, is an essential part of our lives, and therefore, goverment should banlance with art museum and recreational facilities. Initially, art museum and music performance is good for our mental health. When we fell exhausted and boring after daily work, we can go to some museum or music centre accompanying with our friend or family. children can boarden their horizon and adults find real relaxation at the same time. Say my family always like to go to museum where in the center of my hometown. We all attracted by some fantasic panting and handicraft. My parents also tell me some background about the exhibition. That’s a family time when talk to each other, especially days of hard work and study.I feel interesting whenever I do this , and only in these way I can enjoy my life greatly! However , if we take more attention to these museum and music center but ignored to develop recreational facilities what will our life be like? There will be a downtrend in our body health I think. So, recreational facilities is as important as art museum. Just like of equal importance is our physical heath, recreation facilities are a place to do some exercise. I like swimming, it brings me a big fun. After weeks of swimming I find it almost helped me to lose 10 weight without going on a diet. It is entertainment facilities make my life dynamic and vibrant, without which our life would probaby pale. To sum up, Government should support art museum and recreational facilities at same time if they want to create a happy and civilized society.

zhouchlcyUID: 2847817

改好了

樾悦UID: 2689181

11# zhouchlcy
  你是怎么发出word的？？？

ing315UID: 2870197

我也不会发WORD,呵呵~

From my perspective, art museum and music performance, or recreational facilities, is an essential part of our lives, and therefore, goverment should banlance (the investment )with art museum and (that of) recreational facilities.

Initially, art museum and music performance is good for our mental health. When we fell exhausted and boring after daily work, we can go to some museum or music centre accompanying with our friend or family. children can boarden their horizon and adults find real relaxation at the same time. Say my family always like to go to museum where in the center of my hometown.  (观点清晰, 不过语言要加强哦~)
We all attracted by some fantasic panting and handicraft. My parents also tell me some background about the exhibition. That’s a family time when talk to each other, especially days of hard work and study.I feel interesting whenever I do this(上一句话中没有正确指代内容) , and only in these way I can enjoy my life greatly!
.  
However , if we take more attention to these museum and music center but ignored to develop recreational facilities what will our life be like? There will be a downtrend in our body health I think.

So, recreational facilities is as important as art museum. Just like of equal importance is(with,不然有两个谓语) our physical heath, recreation facilities are a place to do some exercise. I like swimming, it brings me a big fun. After weeks of swimming I find it almost helped me to lose 10 weight without going on a diet. It is entertainment facilities make my life dynamic and vibrant, without which our life would probaby pale. (拿自己举例子是很要功力的,你用的挺好的! 但是论点还可以深入发展)
To sum up, Government should support art museum and recreational facilities at same time if they want to create a happy and civilized society.

LZ的英文功底了得~
一战就写出的文章~
但要加强语言~
加油加油~~~`

樾悦UID: 2689181

这篇好难啊  最不会写这种同不同意观点的文章啦。。。。

    写得很差 写完自己看了下后面好的句子乱七八糟的。。。没表达清楚。。  狠狠批吧。。

langtianrinuanUID: 2810236

呵呵，楼主还是要好好写哦，大家看你的文章也是要花费一定时间滴的呢。先通过自己那关的文章再传上来才好呢。 9月14日交.doc (24.5 KB, 下载次数: 6)

2010-9-15 13:25:20 上传

下载次数: 6