作文求拍（10.9考试了 呜呜）

catirUID: 2438002

topic:
In countries where there is a high unemployment, most pupils should be offered only primary education, there is no point in offering secondary education to those who will have no hope of finding a job.

My writting:
At present, many countries are suffering from the depressed economy, which causes the high unemployment. Some people state that primary education is enough in those counties, and it is useless to offer secondary education, since students have no hope of finding jobs. In my opinion, both primary education and secondary education should be offered in any country.

Primary education helps students learn a variety of basic knowledge. It is the primary school where the pupils begin to know the world. For example, in the language classes, students learn their native languages, and how to express their feelings using the language. And in the history classes, students learn the past of their own countries. All of those are of vital importance for the students and their future lives.

However, primary education is not enough for most of the students, especially in a country where there is a high unemployment. Primary education is just the beginning of education, it is the secondary education that gives students a chance to learn more professional knowledge. Moreover, secondary education can not only light the stress of unemployment, but also prepare the students for their future work. If the students do not pursue their secondary education, there will be increasingly umemployed people in the society. Furthermore, people with higher education are more likely to find jobs. Therefore, in the countries of low employment, secondary education should be offered for the benefits of the students and the whole society.

Another fact I would like to point out is that it is a right of everyone to learn. The government can not deprive the right of people, only because they think it is useless. And many students would like to be researchers in the future, which means that they do not care much for the job opportunities. In this occasion, it is not proper for a country to stop their learning.

In conclusion, although primary education provides a large variety of knowledge, it is not proper for a country to stop offering secondary education, since it is a right of everyone, and it is useful.

KinsimonUID: 2846953

厄，这个题目太吓人了。。待会有空再慢慢帮你看~

KinsimonUID: 2846953

关于第一个论点的不必要性 同LS~

以下是我的看法。

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At present, many countries are suffering from the depressed economy, which causes the high unemployment. Somepeople state that primary education is enough in those counties, and it is useless to offer secondary education, since students have no hope of findingjobs. In my opinion, both primary education and secondary education should be offered in any country.

Primary education helpsstudents learn a variety of basic knowledge. It is the primary school where the pupils begin to know the world. For example, in the language classes, studentslearn their native languages, and how to express their feelings using the language. And in the history classes, students learn the past of their own countries.All of those are of vital importance for the students and their future lives.

However, primary education isnot enough for most of the students, especially in a country where there is a high unemployment. Primary education is just the beginning of education, it isthe secondary education that gives students a chance to learn more professional knowledge. Moreover, secondary education can not only light the stress of unemployment,but also prepare the students for their future work. If the students do notpursue their secondary education, there will be increasingly umemployed people in the society. Furthermore, people with higher education are more likely to findjobs.
Therefore, in the countries of low employment, secondary education should be offered for the benefits of the students and the whole society.

Another fact I would like to point out is that it is a right of everyone to learn. The government can not deprive the right of people, only because theythink it is useless. And many students would like to be researchers in the future, which means that they do not care much for the job opportunities. Inthis occasion, it is not proper for a country to stop their learning.

In conclusion, althoughprimary education provides a large variety of knowledge, it is not proper for a country to stop offering secondary education, since it is a right of everyone,and it is useful.


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绿色= 可删
蓝色= 不地道、不利于理解
红色= 有问题 要改  （一直都说primary 、secondary，怎么突然冒出一个higher？）




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其实我觉得这个预测题本身出的就不好，你写起来也困难。。
继续努力。尽量写清楚 易于理解的句子；对你现在来说，我觉得：简洁第一，观点第二。

bqianaUID: 193168

题目是雅思的？

KinsimonUID: 2846953

题目是雅思的？
bqiana 发表于 2010-10-6 07:39

斑竹可以到百度或者google搜一下。。。算是预测题

KinsimonUID: 2846953

看来lz并不关心。大家热情帮看 自己倒闪了。。哈哈