蜂巢小组 I51 by <zwcelesta>

zwcelestaUID: 2941559

The speaker claims that ,"Education will be truly effective only when specifically designed to meet the needs and interests of each student ." In my point of view, it's important for educaion to meet the individual needs and interests of each student, but we should not excessively emphasize specific interests of every student.And we should meet the individual needs and interests as well as ensure the development of students' comprehensive ability.

First of all，the needs and interests of student are important.Education that can meet specific needs and interests of each student will not only make them more developed, but also bring them more passion and motivation for study.As the saying goes, interest is the best teacher.This idiom tells us that students will be more active in study when schools meet their interests. Admittedly, if a student studies more actively, education will be more effective. so it's important for education to meet the needs and interests of each student.

Overdone is worse than undone. Students' needs and interests apart,schools also has the responsibility to help develop their ability to comprehend. If we excessively emphasize needs and interests of each student , it's very likely that we would develop the students who have not comprehensive ability and integrated konwledge system. So we should not excessively and specifically designed the education.

Although, completely equal education and education that excessively emphasize specific interests of each student are not avaliable for students, education can meet the students' interests and develop the ability of them through some other ways.For example, schools can establish several groups, such as physical groups, astronomical groups, exploratory groups. They  can also offer some elective courses which students are interested in for them to choose .

In conclusion, education will be truly effective when we meet the individuai needs and interests of each student and develop the comprehensive ability of each student as well.

uxshenUID: 2577519

The speaker claims that education will be trulyeffective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs andinterests of each student. In my point of view, it's importantfor education to meet the individual needs and interests of eachstudent, but we should not excessively emphasize specificinterests of students. So we should meet the individual needs and interests ofstudent and ensure the development of the student's comprehensive ability. (貌似开头的部分都是题目的重复,尽量把语言变得丰富一些。另外对于连接词的使用可以尝试一些变化。)

First of all，the needs and interests ofstudent are important. The education that can meet the specific needs andinterests of each student will make the student's talent develop, andthe education will also make the students have more passion and motivation ofstudy .（make结构重复，可以变化）People say "theinterest is best teacher" , which tells us that the studentwill be more active in study when the school meet their interests. Admittedly,if the student study more actively, the education will be more effective. So it's important foreducation to meet the needs and interests of each student.

Though we should meet the specific needs and interests of student, it'snot reasonable to excessively and specifically design education. because theschool should develop the students who have integrated
knowledge(两个单词都拼错了) system and theeducation should educate the students who have comprehensive ability. （对于should作为论据我觉得说服力不强，此处是否可以寻找一些其他的论据呢？）If we excessiveemphasize the individual needs and interests of each student, it's possiblethat we develop the students who have not comprehensive ability and integrated knowledge system. So we shouldnot excessively and specifically design the education.

Although, the completely equally education and the education thatexcessively emphasize specific interests of each student are not available to students，the education canthrough several ways to meet the student’s interests and develop the ability ofthe student. For example, the school can establish several groups, such as physicalgroup, astronomical group, and exploratory group.School also can give the elective course for who want to take it.

In conclusion, the education will be truly effective when we meet the individual needs andinterests of each student and develop the comprehensive ability of each studentas well.

1．
语言比较简练，望在选词上和长句上再改进一下。注意细节错误较多，如拼写，大小写，估计是因为你生病的原因吧

2．
结构：结构完整，条理清晰

3．
论证：正反方的论证很平衡但论据不够充足，可以多搜寻一下例子

4．
逻辑：无逻辑错误

5．
思路：很清晰，但是对于重复题目中的词或句，希望能在进行一下斟酌

总而言之，觉得你的文章的语言比较欠缺，希望我们一起改进~~

ijanieUID: 2946433

The speaker claims that ,"Education will be truly effective only when specifically designed to meet the needs and interests of each student ." In my point of view, it's important for educaion to meet the individual needs and interests of each student, but we should not excessively emphasize specific interests of every student.And we should meet the individual needs and interests as well as ensure the development of students' comprehensive ability.
First of all，the needs and interests of student are important.Education that can meet specific needs and interests of each student will not only makes them more developed(developed意思不合适，建议growing), but also bring them more passion and motivation for study.As the saying goes, interest is the best teacher.This idiom tells us that students will be more active in study when schools meet their interests. Admittedly, if a student studies more actively, education will be more effective. so it's important for education to meet the needs and interests of each student.
Overdone is worse than undone. Students' needs and interests apart（不是很明白）,(and/while) schools also has the responsibility to help develop their ability to comprehend. If we excessively emphasize needs and interests of each student , it's very likely that we would develop（cultivate） the students who have not comprehensive ability and integrated(complete) knowledge system. So we should not excessively and specifically designed the education(为什么不能过于细节地设计教育呢，应该是不能过于具体地满足每个人的兴趣吧？).
Although, completely equal education and education that excessively emphasize specific interests of each student are not avaliable for students, education can meet the students' interests and develop the ability of them through some other ways.For example, schools can establish several groups, such as physical groups, astronomical groups, exploratory groups. They  can also offer some elective courses which students are interested in for them to choose .
In conclusion, education will be truly effective when we meet the individuai needs and interests of each student and develop the comprehensive ability of each student as well.

语言简洁易懂，可以试着把某两句话用些复杂的从句组合在一起，长短结合；思路是很清晰，正反论证，和uxshen的观点一样。论证的素材和方法稍微欠缺点，后面慢慢积累，大家一起进步，建议可以看看uxshen的这篇文章，和你的是一个观点，论证比较充分。一起进步!

zwcelestaUID: 2941559

People today place much more expectation on public eduction than they used to do. Insofar as the cultivation of the interest has served as the paramount role in growth of one individual,it has been regarded as the most rational avenue to educate students from this point of view. It also make some persons to claim that eduction should be specially designed to each student.As far as I am concerned,education should have some freedom to cultivate students in terms of their different characterisitic,which must base on the inculcating of the universal values regardless of whether they are interested in it.(我应该学习这个开头！)
    The purpose of the public eduction is not only to allow students to be able to handle whatever life may present including all the unknowns in the future,but also to  spread the universal values,ideas and standard which are shared by human being.Through education,students are capable of adapting themselves to the sociaty activity and become a member of it.
    There is no denying the fact of the necessity for the educators to pay attention to the characteristic of each individual.As the Bacon said,interest is the best teacher（我也用了这句。可是也不知道是谁说的）.Encouraging every student to find their hobbies and guiding the students to cultivate them is the responsibility of teachers.Interest will not only increase the enthusiasm of learn,but also rise the efficiency of study.However,overrating the effect of the personal characteristic during the process of eduction and reaching the conclusion that eduction should be specially design to each individual is biased and infeasible.
     First of all,the recouce of the education is limited.In order to satisfy the diverse student's need,the government has to offer an additional public expenditure ,which should be spent on the more necessary area such as eliminating the poverty and improving the midical treatment , to all the public eduction institutions to improve the facilities and extend the number of faculy. Also,a great number of specialists are required to teach in the junior eduction as the level of specialization of the contemporary teacher jn junior schools are not high enough to meet the needs of the interest of diverse student.These specialists should have searched in their own field and make much more contributions to our society.Such ideas like that （like that 应该用得还好）will plummet the efficiency of the whole system of the society.
      What is more important is that there are （there are 应该去掉）some precious ideas and values which are the wisdom of human being should be inculcated to all the students regardless of their interest.Boil down to the specially designed courses,students will be busy boring holes for themselvs,aquiring their favourite knowledge and skills,that in later life,they might astonishingly find that they have little in common in the way of ideas,values and standards.What they lack of is the most commom emotion of mankind.Simply eduction based on the interests of individual will prevent the universal values from being spread and lead to a psychological displacement of our students.Madison once wrote that,the competing,balancing of interests of diverse people ensure the suvival of the liberty.but there are values that all American citizens shared should want all students to kown and to make their own honesty,fairness,selfdiscipline,loyaltytotasks.friends,families,personal responsibility,love of a coutry.and belief in principle of liberty,equality and the freedom to practice one's faith.
       What the educator are supposed to do is find out a balance between individual's interest and widespread of universal values.Only by means of this could the young generation grow in both moral and faculities.That is the most effeciency way in which we teach the students.（这个结尾我也喜欢！）
1．
语言：整篇文章的语言很好。额。想起自己的。感到很失败啊！呵呵。我学到了很多啊。希望有些长句最好还是写得容易读懂一些。
2．
结构：结构完整，条理较清晰，

3．
论证：论证平衡，论据也足够。
4．
逻辑：无逻辑错误

5．
思路：很清晰
呵呵。我觉得这篇文章写的很好！很值得学习。吼吼！我要进步！