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发表于 2010-12-18 19:16:29 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
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Do you agree or disagree with the statement. Most of the advertisements make products appear better than they really are.


Do most of the advertisements make products appear better than they really are? From my point of view, I strongly agree with this statement. Here comes the three reasons.



First of all, the goal of an advertisement is to make a product known to the public. To catch the attention of people, the advertisement should show the product's flash point in comparison with that of other products. However, other products may be in high quality as well as this one. For this reason, most advertisements would more or less exaggerate the function or the effect of products to achieve its goal.



Secondly, merchants need to promote profit in oder to survive in the fiercer commercial competition. To stimulate the profit, merchants require advertisements to extend its products' function to earn added popularity. For example, an advertisement of toothpaste asserts its product can whiten people's tooth in two weeks while others have not obtain this outstanding ability, however, in fact, it needs at least one month for its products to whiten people's tooth. In this method, this product could earn more attention from the public.



Finally, advertisements give people psychological suggestion that their products are better than others even if this maybe untrue. People are prone to purchase goods which is more familiar to them. For instance, when someone makes a decision which refrigerator he or she should buy, there exists more possibility that the person would choose the one which he or she always hear on the television because the person may think this refrigerator is better than other ones. In this way, advertisements make products look better than they really are.



All in a word, because of the nature of advertisement, the keen competition in commerce and the psychological suggestion that advertisement imposed on, most advertisements inevitably make products appear better than they really are.








这是蜗牛的第一次托福作文,各位手下别留情,让砖头来得更猛烈些吧!
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沙发
发表于 2010-12-18 20:42:37 |只看该作者
帮顶一个~

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板凳
发表于 2010-12-18 22:25:22 |只看该作者
新手一枚,多多关照~~~
自己顶一下!!

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地板
发表于 2010-12-18 23:33:32 |只看该作者
Do most ofthe advertisements make products appear better than they really are? From mypoint of view, I strongly agree with this statement. Here comes the threereasons.# L' X6 C1 v6 }' b: ?8 Z
First of all, the goal of an advertisement is tomake a product known to the public. To catch the attention of people, theadvertisement should show the product's flash point in comparison with that ofother products. However, other products may be in high quality as well as thisone. For this reason, most advertisements would more or less exaggerate thefunction or the effect of products to achieve its goal.
) C# Y8 y1[1 M
Secondly, merchants need to promote profit in oderto survive in the fiercer commercial competition. To stimulate the profit,merchants require advertisements to extend its products' function to earn addedpopularity. For example, an advertisement of toothpaste asserts its product canwhiten people's tooth in two weeks while others have not obtain thisoutstanding ability, however, in fact, it needs at least one month for itsproducts to whiten people's tooth. In this method, this product could earn moreattention from the public.
) m&J  P7 u- K6 Finally,advertisements give people psychological suggestion that their products arebetter than others even if this maybe(改成 may be或者maybe is 否则没有谓语啦 untrue. People are prone to purchase goodswhich isare more familiar to them. For instance, whensomeone makes a decision which refrigerator he or she should buy, there existsmore possibility that the person would choose the one which he or she alwayshear on the television because the person may think this refrigerator is betterthan other ones. In this way, advertisements make products look better thanthey really are.
/ R, Z: A" ]* XAll in a word, because of the nature ofadvertisement, the keen competition in commerce and the psychologicalsuggestion that advertisement imposeded??why on, most advertisements inevitably makeproducts appear better than they really are.
0 |; W  ~4 W6 d6 L

这真的是第一次写啊,那你底子真好,用词感觉很到位的,而且不重复,简直是羡慕!flashpointstimulate assert prone keen替代前面的fierce 都用得好啊!还有句型很丰富,学到很多!以后会一直关注你的作文的。
建议的话,觉得你的语言真的很顺畅了,似乎习惯用不定式,To打头的句子很多,不定式连用也有,可以收集一些表达目的的其他方法。
表达意思上,读完第一段第二段感觉是说一个内容,因为都在说catchpeople’s attention。不过读到结尾的时候(这个结尾太好了!),终于明白这两段的不同之处,是从广告本身和商家两方面入手。建议增加写论点不同之处的笔墨,减少相同,以免重复和歧义。

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发表于 2010-12-20 22:58:56 |只看该作者
First of all, the goal of an advertisement is to make a product known to the public. To catch the attention of people, the advertisement should show the product's flash point in comparison with that of other products. However, other products may be in high quality as well as this one. For this reason, most advertisements would more or less exaggerate the function or the effect of products to achieve its goal.


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Secondly, merchants need to promote profit in oder(order) to survive in the fiercer commercial competition. To stimulate the profit, merchants require advertisements to extend its products' function to earn added popularity. For example, an advertisement of toothpaste asserts its product can whiten people's tooth in two weeks while others have not obtain this outstanding ability, however, in fact, it needs at least one month for its products to whiten people's tooth. In this method, this product could earn more attention from the public.
. d, d% v0 ]' O2 P$ j7 }' Q
+ P& j8 T6 [% _" x$ Q$ O
# @7 f  j( t. e) U
Finally, advertisements give people psychological suggestion that their products are better than others even if this maybe untrue. People are prone to purchase goods which is(改为are) more familiar to them. For instance, when someone makes a decision which refrigerator he or she should buy, there exists more possibility that the person would choose the one which he or she always hear on the television because the person may think this refrigerator is better than other ones. In this way, advertisements make products look better than they really are.% R1 \, G- ?, A* C

3 o0 P, n2 c4 Q2 S" x5 O* F9 U

All in a word, because of the nature of advertisement, the keen competition in commerce and the psychological suggestion that advertisement imposed on, most advertisements inevitably make products appear better than they really are. 6 v; w' V3 B( M3 h7 d5 d. f

写得很不错哦,就像是作文书上的,词语用得很生动,无论是动词还是形容词。但是,我认为第一个观点和第二个好像差不多意思。

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发表于 2010-12-21 02:46:33 |只看该作者
写的很好了,条理清楚,用词恰当。第三段写广告的心理效应时, 能不能写比如看到明星做广告就觉得产品很好,因为连明星都用它。另外第一个原因和第二个原因有点像,第二个原因能不能写成广告介绍产品的方式有助于让人们产生对该产品的好印象。比如卖洗衣粉的,通过展示一件白衣服用该洗衣粉清洗前后白的程度得对比,很容易让人们产生对该产品的信任,觉得该洗衣粉什么样的stain都能洗掉。
other products may be in high quality as well as this one. 能不能改一下。
其实我觉得你写的已经很好了,肯定比我写的好,只是把我的想法告诉你,祝你作文得满分。

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发表于 2010-12-22 09:23:13 |只看该作者
多谢大家的批改,第一篇作文没限时,写了好久的。
最近学校网络不给力啊,12月21日的写好了传不上,晚上回去再试试……
再次感谢各位的修改哈!

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发表于 2010-12-22 16:22:17 |只看该作者
多谢大家的批改,第一篇作文没限时,写了好久的。
最近学校网络不给力啊,12月21日的写好了传不上,晚上回去再试试……
再次感谢各位的修改哈!
Sudden2012 发表于 2010-12-22 09:23

恩,你给的建议很gelivable,呵呵,
我是很纠结的写出来的,其实我是想说basic和concentration都需要学。
这个题目是有点昏,regardless是不是可以翻译成 不管,不顾or不论~ 所以 这个题目还真是含混。
另外,文章传上后我帮你修改 THX
We created our own thorns, and never stopped to count the cost.

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发表于 2010-12-22 22:07:19 |只看该作者
期待你的下一篇啊 让我也有个范文参考下啊~

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发表于 2010-12-22 23:07:47 |只看该作者
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Do you agree or disagree with the statement. All university should take basic science course, regardless of their field of concentration.

Is it sagacious for all university to take basic science course in spite of their field of concentration? From my point of view, the answer is yes. For basic science course is the element of major course, even if some basic science courses are not of fundamental to major course, they might be signifigant in student's future career and students can associate with people out of their specialty, who may lead them to succeed in the future. I will argue these reasons in turn.

Firstly, it is undoubtedly that major course is primary for student's concentrated field, however, major course is based on basic science course. We can not interpret some knowledge in major course without somepppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp in basic course. For example, in major course of dynamics, one do know how to build an equation but cannot solve this equation without basic mathematic method.

Additionally, even if some basic science courses are not such important for major course, they may play an important role in student's later life. Students face with fiercer competition in nowaday society, holding more techniques means having more opportunities. Basketball course, for instance, one could have the ability to hold a basketball match after this course while others do not have. His or her boss may appreciate this kind of capacity which could energize employees so that the boss should provide more chances for him or her.

Finally, since basic science course is opened for students who concentrate in different fields, they can make friends with people in other professions who might give them a hand on their way to realize their life goal. For example, a person need to found a company, the person could invite his or her friends meet in basic science course who are in other majors other than his or her classmates who hold the same knowledge. This behaviour may make the person's goal come true easier.

To sum up, because basic science course is the fundament of major course and some basic science courses might be helpful in student's future career in addition students can associate with people in different field which enlarge the possibility of their succeed, it is insightful for all universities to take basic science course.

终于传上来了,不容易啊!校园网,我……
麻烦各位给看看哈,thx~~~~~

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发表于 2010-12-24 23:28:15 |只看该作者
不给力啊,自己顶……

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发表于 2010-12-25 20:32:24 |只看该作者
12月21日 已经修改好,见附件。

1221蜗牛独立xiong.doc

24 KB, 下载次数: 2

We created our own thorns, and never stopped to count the cost.

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