daily writing---我的作文帖。。

笑会计UID: 2872606

不好意思迟了

bibby00888UID: 2908529

2.22independent

beangtUID: 2691375

2.22 独立修改
Nowadays, the high pace and heavy burden of everyday life force people to adopt themselves to the sharp changes. So much time occupied in official affairs, at the sacrifice of family get-together, not only can make the economic boom but also generate such social problems as the sense of family isolation, juvenile delinquents, and the high rate of divorce.(句子意思很好，但我觉得是不是少主语？还有这种转折关系用not only, but also不合适) So the assertion to say it is not important for families to eat meals together regularly may be unreasonable and a veil of many potential problems in a families.

Exactly, we had better not regard a regular meal as just a meal. First, it is a rare chance for every member of the family embodied with so much expectation, especially for the children who may live in state which is lack mother’s love or father’s love.(single-parent children?) It is vital for a child to experience a childhood filled with love rather than quarrel, which may have a life-long negative influence on the children. Second, during the meal, the children experience another style of education. For instance, children can learn the table manner which can teach the young what deeds are proper and what are impolite. That is knowledge may be used inevitably in our social life. After all, the regular meals let the member feel that we are a united family and we can rely on each other. The faith is so important for a family to build a brighter future together.

As is known to all, what cells are to human’s body, families are to the communities. Consequently, a good family atmosphere is the basic foundation of a harmonious society.(主题句应该放在前面比较好吧？) In retrospect to my experiences, family members to eat meals together are the sweetest memory in my childhood. It is a good chance to enhance emotional attachment among family members and the ease atmosphere can help us to release ourselves from the troublesome. What is more, a piece of advice for a certain problem or a some comfort words for a gloomy young man, may bring light to him. A meal can provide the children with advisable guidance, and the support for a family member’s career. Therefore, the meals are so significant that if a small problem can be solved in a certain family, there will be no big problems remaining in the whole society.

Finally, in order to maintain or fix the relationship of a family you may have other choices, however, the regular meal is the best choice to prevent the appearance (emergence) of gap in family. Because it is consistent and regular, the problem can be solved before the deterioration. Although, some people play down the effect of the small deed of a regular meal, I firmly believe that no matter individuals or the whole society can benefit from it a lot.

结构清楚明了，语言也不错，向你学习了，加油！

bibby00888UID: 2908529

2.23 综合+独立

sEven_zhUID: 3007258

2.22修改，不好意思晚了点

bibby00888UID: 2908529

2.24独立

PsMaggieUID: 2861847

迟到的修改。。。2.23综合

sun3mayUID: 2574771

2.24独立 改好了
抱歉 放上来晚了。
感觉文章写得很好的呢~

bibby00888UID: 2908529

2.25独立+综合

candis712UID: 2824089

2.25 独立修改

bibby00888UID: 2908529

2.26独立+综合 嘿嘿 大家一起进步

笑会计UID: 2872606

2.25修改

bibby00888UID: 2908529

2.26独立+++综合

feifeionlyUID: 2778967

26日独立

笑会计UID: 2872606

TPO 7 看过了，没有要改的地方，很好，继续加油~