0423考试，求修改

christina1949UID: 2992239

Which is better, challenging plans about one's future or practical plans about one's future?

  As the life tempo of the most presented time is rather higher, and the life pressure is a great burden on my life, I would prefer a practical plan about my future.

Most of the people in the same age as me have a great responsibility for our family，especially for our labored parents. We all come from a single child family and once we get married we have four parents to support. Our parents have spent all of their prosperity in cultivating us and we are in badly hope to give them a stable, sweet, and lightly life which aquires（requires） for a large amount of our energy, and our time. Thus then, we need a healthy body and normal family. If our future plan is of great pressure and challenge, they won’t feel easy.

Admittedly, the life pressure is extremely strong and we may not be able to own a house, a car, even a desirable family. The increasing price of houses made the houses less attainable for most of young people who just works for one or two years, but who is in badly need for marriage. The inability for them to afford a house may led to their lost of their lovers. They have less chance to get a high salary to purchase a house once they take challenging plans about their future, and whose progress is of rather poverty and pressure. For instance, my brother gets no fruits from the first four years of establishing his own business even though he struggled everyday. A practical plan about our future is more realistic in this cruel society.

A challenging life is not suitable for most of the people for the rather higher pressure even though you may be successful. Considering everyday we have to worry about the business, thus we may lost some rather precious moment in the life. We may not be able to get contact with our sweet friends, our parents may be in badly missing for their child's taking care, our sweet off-spring may learn from the bad friends without the cultivation of their parents. Which may be terrible for everyone.

christina1949UID: 2992239

综合
TPO19
In the article, the professor argue that the buzzers always tell lies about the products to the customers, for that the buzzers would only praise the products in order to get payment from the which is not approval for the buzzer in the lecture .In his eyes the buzzers are the ones who really think high of the products and the service of the company, as the company would only employ the ones who has used the products and do think high of the products.
Secondly, the professor thinks that customers would always hold more trust in the familiar people and they can be convinced easier if only their friends praise the products, which is contract for the buzzer. In his opinion, the people would require more from their friends as the price of the products, the service and how long he has used it, which means that he has to provide more evidence to convince them.
Last but not the least, the professor worries about the bad influence brought in by buzzing , people may always hold the doubt whether their friends who praise one kind of products or service may be buzzers. The buzzer argues that it would not be true and if only you are a buzzer you would be more popular and open-hearted.

christina1949UID: 2992239

综合18
  The lecture apparently refuses the reading passage. According to the reading passage the endangered kinds of trees would survive if only they are supported according to three methods, while the lecture hold totally opposite views.
First, the passage states that it would be beneficial to the endangered tree if we plant it in their native location. But the lecture disagrees with that as the rather different weather condition compared with the ones there thousands of years ago, as the strong influence of the global warming and the disappearance of the wet lands.
Secondly, the passage insists that the move of the plants to a totally different place would be useful as it may be a more suitable place for it to survive as the lower temperature there，while the lecture argues that it may bring a lot of trouble to the plants there. For instance, the invasion of plants may bring disaster or even disappearance to the native plants which are already endangered.
Last but not the least, from the reading passage it is helpful for the science library to protect the plants and do research to save them. However, the lecture cast doubt on it by reminding us that the survival of the plants requires the protection of rather a large amount of samples which may not be affordable by a science lab.

liuyan_adamsUID: 2656072

Which is better, challenging plans about one's future or practical plans about one's future?

' s9 J9 ^) K. W+ E; N; _  As the life tempo of the most presented time(不懂啥意思) is rather higher, and the life pressure is a great burden on my life, I would prefer a practical plan about my future.

Considering an increasingly higher life tempo as well as a heavier life pressure i have to burden with, I would prefer a practical plan about my future. (我觉得这样写比较好，我也比较挫，相互学习吧。)
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) B7 x8 |  m$ Y  qMost of the people with the same age as me have a great sense of responsibility for our family，especially for our labored parents. We all come from a single child family and once we get married we will  have four parents to support. Our parents have spent all of their prosperity(不太懂啥意思) in cultivating us and we are in badly hope to give them a stable, sweet, and lightly life which undoubtedly aquires（requires） for a large amount of our energy, and our time. Thus then, we need a healthy body and normal family. If our future plan is of great risk and challenge, they won’t feel easy.* u8 d* u  V. y! l1 p7 a
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Admittedly, the life pressure is extremely strong and we may not be able to own a house, a car, even a desirable family. The increasing price of houses made the houses less attainable for most of young people who just have worked for one or two years while is in badly need for marriage. The inability for them to afford a house may lead to their lost of their lovers. They have less chance to get a high salary to purchase a house once they take challenging plans about their future, and whose progress is of rather poverty and pressure(不太懂). For instance, my brother gets no fruits from the first four years of establishing his own business even though he struggled everyday. A practical plan about our future is more realistic in this cruel society.
( K5 U2 {, e: p) f4 P" V) ^! Y/ @" j  N! s0 C* v3 o+ M
A challenging life is not suitable for most of the people even though you may be successful. Just imagine if everyday we have to worry about the business, we may lost some rather precious moment in the life. We may not be able to get contact with our sweet friends, our parents may be in badly missing for their child's taking care（不懂）, our sweet off-spring may learn from the bad friends without the cultivation of their parents. Which may be terrible for everyone.（我觉得最后一句有点怪）

Yvaine198831UID: 2956487

你说你下不来   所以我在这贴上给你改吧。

As the life tempo of the most presented time（at present简单明了） is rather higher, and（不要随便两个句子中间就加and） the life pressure is a great burden on my life, I would prefer a practical plan about my future.

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Most of the people in the same age as me（in my age）have a great responsibility for our family，especially for our labored parents. We all come from a single child family and(改掉用and连接句子的习惯) once we get married we have four parents to support. Our parents have spent all of their prosperity in（on）cultivating us and (又来)we are in badly hope to give them a stable, sweet, and lightly life which aquires（requires） for（require是及物动词不用for） a large amount of our energy, and our time. Thus then（then可以省去）, we need a healthy body and normal family. If our future plan is of great pressure and challenge, they won’t feel easy.

题目是要选择一个实际的规划还是一个有挑战的规划，而你把重点放在了因为要赡养老人，所以压力很大，，，跑题了。其实还是可以联系到题目上的，关键是要把它们之间的关系体现出来。"r/ d% I; B' E% I8 d) A- D2 `

Admittedly, the life pressure is extremely strong and we may not be able to own a house, a car, even a desirable family. The increasing price of houses made the houses less attainable for most of young people who just works for one or two years, but who is in badly need for marriage. The inability for them to afford a house may led（lead） to their lost of their lovers. They have less chance to get a high salary to purchase a house once they take challenging plans about their future, and whose progress is of rather poverty and pressure（想说什么呢？而且引导词怎么用whose呢？）. For instance, my brother gets no fruits（profit 或者revenue） from the first four years of establishing his own business even though he struggled everyday. A practical plan about our future is more realistic in this cruel society.

仍然没有切中重点，反而偏向了你反驳的那个观点。在我看了，一个challenging plan更能跟人们增加财富啊。你重要的论据就是practical plan 更稳定，适合追求Peace serenit stability的人。


R  Z* ~$ }( J1 \
A challenging life is not suitable for most of the people for the rather higher pressure even though you may be successful. Considering everyday we have to worry about the business, thus we may lost some rather（不要乱用） precious moment in the life. We may not be able to get contact with our sweet（太口语化了，而且朋友也不用sweet修饰。close就行了。不要嫌这些词级别低，先把内容搞好，再选词） friends, our parents may be in badly missing for their child's taking care（什么意思？）, our sweet（又来！） off-spring may learn from the bad friends without the cultivation of their parents. Which may be terrible for everyone.（这句话放在这意义何在？？？）

首先还是理解题目，然后是内容要明确。最后才是句子的修辞和词汇。我是这么认为的，多练就会有提高。加油

Yvaine198831UID: 2956487

The lecture apparently refuses the viewpoints metioned in reading passage. According to the reading passage the endangered kinds of trees would survive if only they are supported according to（by） three methods, while the lecture hold totally opposite views.: W4 [* h9 ~) p8 e

First, the passage states that it would be beneficial to the endangered tree if we plant（好像是重新种植吧。不应该就用plant） it in their native location. But the lecture disagrees with that as the rather different weather condition compared with the ones there thousands of years ago, as the strong influence of the global warming and the （定冠词去掉）disappearance of the wet lands. 9 p0 F6 T* l% b+ n' |2 ^6 l4 ~5 Q: E

Secondly, the passage insists that the move of the（定冠词定冠词。。还有Move是动词。） plants to a totally different place would be useful as it may be a more suitable place for it to survive as the lower temperature there，while the lecture argues that it may bring a lot of troubles to the plants there. For instance, the invasion of plants may bring disaster or even disappearance to the native plants which are already endangered.

Last but not the least, from the reading passage it is helpful for the science library to protect the plants and do research to save them. However, the lecture cast doubts on it by reminding us that the survival of the plants requires the protection of rather a large amount of samples which may not be affordable by a science lab.

句子和语法没有什么大错误。就是论点还是要仔细听听的。比如最后一个  好像听力中提到了实验室的空间不够大吧。忘记了。。。

justin234UID: 2815444

4.12 独立改
不好意思晚了