issue33 欢迎光顾！

happyman2000UID: 136936

Issue 33 creating an appealing image has become more important in contemporary society than is the reality or truth behind that image.
在当代社会，包装一个光鲜的外表远比外表背后的事实或本质更重要。

Certainly it is true that in modern society it has become more important than ever before to create an appealing image in order to win an advantage over competitors. But by arguing that its position has replaced that of the reality or truth behind image, it seems to go to extreme. The inexactness and erroneousness in the above argument is not difficult to be uncovered and apprehended, if only we deliberately take into account the primary motivations and reasons for why people today emphasize external appearance so much.

Modern industry has invented numerous new products that had brought us great convenience and comfort unimagined in the past. However, with the ever-increasing complexity of modern industrial products, we are becoming more and more ignorant of these scientific implements that we use or enjoy day to day. When we purchase them, we are always blindfold, for reason that we could not definitely know how to evaluate their actual quality and performance scientifically. On this occasion, it seems to be a presumably viable way for us to determine whether to purchase or not by simply observing the exterior images of those products. Subjective though this means may be at the first glance, it works for the most part. The companies that have enough ability to create an appealing image for their products are almost always those that have enough economic resources and technological capacity to produce high-qualified commodities. This is why larger firms through the world spend much money in devising and creating an attractable appearance of products. This kind of behavior creates an illusion, misleading someone to believe that the image is more important than the reality or truth behind that image. But when produces do this, they consciously know that their true purpose is to indicate high quality underlies in their products, not to show a beautiful appearance. And most consumers are also clearly aware of that what they really want is not the appearance, but the internal quality behind the appearance.

The competition in product’s appearance has long been beyond the range of material products. Today, the focus of international companies has shifted to create an appealing brand image or corporation image. Every year, the Coca-Cola Company or the Nike Company spends billions of dollars in advertising, not for a particular product, but for their corporation image or brand image. The true purpose of their huge inputs is the same, to reassure consumers though the world that all their products, either current or future, are always high qualified and creditable, and their huge expense in advertising is just a good indicator or proof. Consumers have enough justification to believe in this point. After all, not every company has such an ability to spend so much money in merely creating an appearance!   

Too luxurious is it! Some one may criticize. I admit that there exists some inefficiency in this means. But who can find a better way more efficient? In this world with asymmetry of information where consumers cannot fairly know about commodities’ actual quality, there must be a mechanism to assure that what is really good in nature can be successfully sell out. If we fail to do this, the society will immediately fall into crisis: factories go into bankruptcy; workers unemployed; government break down, etc. Therefore, the unexampled emphasis on image is beneficial to the whole society on the whole in that it decreases the change cost, increases the vitality of market and enhances the overall well being of people.  

In conclusion, it is just an ostensible phenomenon that the contemporary society lays more emphasis on creating an appealing image. The true essence behind this phenomenon is to alleviate asymmetry of information of modern industrial society, that is to say, to make information about the reality or truth behind that image more attainable to people.  (637 words)

paisleyUID: 64183

我觉得你的语言挺不错咯。但是内容上有问题。

你虽然认为本质更重要(注意:题目也没有说本质不重要，只是说，从现在的现象来看，外表比本质的作用更大了,有那么点发牢骚的味道) 你呢，就顺着他的口气，把牢骚发到底. 可是犯了自相矛盾的错误。如果你真想牢骚，就该赞同他的立场, 可是你在第一段,偏偏又采取了相反的立场。

你通篇都在说,外表的作用越来越大了，在社会里是如何体现的。然后在倒数第二段的地方说"这样不好". 感觉你这像一篇随感，顺着脑子里想的笔尖游走,而没有注意克制自己的思路聚焦在一点上。不是一篇正式的论说文.

说的不一定对，楼下在开一个露天晚会，吵得我实在没法集中注意力.

希望你也能多多修改其他朋友的文章。尤其是提点结构上和想法上的建议。因为你不可能每个题目都练过来啊，看别人的题目，自己脑子过一遍,既可以给别人提建议，自己又多了一次训练的机会.为别人服务的人优先得到斑竹的修改哦！

imongUID: 140258

Certainly it is true that in modern society it has become more important than ever before to create an appealing image in order to win an advantage over competitors. （中间读着怎么有点变扭？）But by arguing that its position has replaced that of the reality or truth behind image, it seems to go to extreme. The inexactness and erroneousness in the above argument is not difficult to be uncovered and apprehended, if only we deliberately take into account the primary motivations and reasons for why people today emphasize external appearance so much. （意思可以猜到，可是读起来好诡异哦，是不是改变一下用词啊）

Modern industry has invented numerous new products that had brought us great convenience and comfort unimagined (换) in the past. However, with the ever-increasing complexity of modern industrial products, we are becoming more and more ignorant of these scientific implements that we use or enjoy day to day (everyday). When we purchase them, we are always blindfold, for reason that we could not definitely know how to evaluate their actual quality and performance scientifically. On this occasion, it seems to be a presumably viable way for us to determine whether to purchase or not by simply observing the exterior images of those products. Subjective though this means may be at the first glance, it works for the most part. The companies that have enough ability to create an appealing image for their products are almost always those that have enough economic resources and technological capacity to produce high-qualified commodities. This is why larger firms through the world spend much money in devising and creating an attractable appearance of products. This kind of behavior creates an illusion, misleading someone to believe that the image is more important than the reality or truth behind that image. But when produces do this, they consciously know that their true purpose is to indicate high quality underlies in their products, not to show a beautiful appearance. And most consumers are also clearly aware of that what they really want is not the appearance, but the internal quality behind the appearance. （I don’t enjoy your sentence hopping here）

The competition in product’s appearance has long been beyond the range of material products. Today, the focus of international companies has shifted to create an appealing brand image or corporation image. Every year, the Coca-Cola Company or the Nike Company spends billions of dollars in advertising, not for a particular product, but for their corporation image or brand image. The true purpose of their huge inputs is the same, to reassure consumers though the world that all their products, either current or future, are always high qualified and creditable, and their huge expense in advertising is just a good indicator or proof. Consumers have enough justification to believe in this point. After all, not every company has such an ability to spend so much money in merely creating an appearance! (光感叹了，可是你的观点呢？你是认同cola烧钱还是对之深恶痛绝？一个para解决一个问题，最基本的一点啊)

Too luxurious is it! Some one may criticize. I admit that there exists some inefficiency in this means. But who can find a better way more efficient? In this world with asymmetry of information where consumers cannot fairly know about commodities’ actual quality, there must be a mechanism to assure that what is really good in nature can be successfully sell out. If we fail to do this, the society will immediately fall into crisis: factories go into bankruptcy; workers unemployed; government break down, etc. Therefore, the unexampled emphasis on image is beneficial to the whole society on the whole in that it decreases the change cost, increases the vitality of market and enhances the overall well being of people.

In conclusion, it is just an ostensible phenomenon that the contemporary society lays more emphasis on creating an appealing image. The true essence behind this phenomenon is to alleviate asymmetry of information of modern industrial society, that is to say, to make information about the reality or truth behind that image more attainable to people. (637 words)
你的观点是支持吧,yet I find it hard to follow your 2nd paragraph. 我觉得实在是跟不上你的思路？建议你再考虑一下一些连词的使用，这样会加强逻辑结构。还有单词的原则应该是推敲且自然。
我看这样吧，明天我就写这个，写完了我贴在后面，你再帮我改一改。我尽量争取在句法上有所突破，好吧？

happyman2000UID: 136936

看来，我没有清晰地表达我的意思！非常抱歉！

我的本意是反对该观点的。我认为现代社会存在着严重的信息不对称，消费者无法了解产品质量，只好从外观判断质量的高低， 而厂商也只好包装一个漂亮的外表。但是双方的共同目的是一致的，既通过外表诉求或表现产品内在的质量和性能。所以，虽然现代社会里包装越来越重要，但并不代表内在本质相对不重要，甚至更体现了本质的重要性。

经济学中常说“信号”，在不对称信息条件下，“信号”就承担着显示内在品质的重要功能。我认为，现代社会中的大部分包装现象，发挥的其实就是“信号”的作用。

我前面写的几篇文章，都力求简单明了。但看高分范文时，发现它们很少把话说得那么直接。我的这篇作文也有点故意模仿这种风格，可能影响了理解。 我不知道这种文风有益还是有害？请高人指点！

imongUID: 140258

我上午写了400字左右
越看自己越别扭
一气之下选都给删了
我看得等过n天才能再看这个题目了
天哪，今天一点都不会有好心情了

paisleyUID: 64183

最初由 happyman2000 发布
[B]看来，我没有清晰地表达我的意思！非常抱歉！

我的本意是反对该观点的。我认为现代社会存在着严重的信息不对称，消费者无法了解产品质量，只好从外观判断质量的高低， ?.

以下省略...... [/B]

我觉得你这些观点挺好的。那你干脆就承认包装和外表很重要好了。呵呵，没人会跟你打官司的。只要把你首段的立场改改就行了。或者呢，再来个让步，说，“我说的外表重要，指的是并无欺瞒的情况下”

这样如何？

paisleyUID: 64183

最初由 imong 发布
[B]我上午写了400字左右
越看自己越别扭
一气之下选都给删了
我看得等过n天才能再看这个题目了
天哪，今天一点都不会有好心情了 [/B]

别生气咯。每个人都有状态好的时候和状态不好的时候。不好的时候就丢开书玩去，或者看看前贤们写的东西，充充电，过几天再来写好了。为这么小破作文坏了一天心情，实在不合算。

happyman2000UID: 136936

to paisley:
多谢你的建议！

imongUID: 140258

谢谢paisley姐姐
我中午去楼下的“太空漫步”上面走了一会儿
现在已经好多了
而且还刚刚花了40min写了一个argument ：）
有时候崩溃一下也好吧，虽然动不动就想算了别考了，其实总会恢复回来的
而且上次痛定思痛，还悟出了一点真相的哦