【Daily Writing 作文特训小组】色色的作文练习帖

sixjjleighUID: 2918719

8.5  其实是两天前写的，史上第一篇托福作文，熬了两个多小时死了无数脑细胞，半抄半掰也只挤出来285个词，第三段后面直到最后明显是凑字数了。。。求修改，求指教，求拍砖。。。

独立写作：
经验知识和书本知识，哪个更重要？

Knowledge is a kind of tool that allows people to be aware of information, including theoretical and practical, that promotes our daily life.


Some people may argue that knowledge from books is more crucial.Though their argument may sound reasonable, I scarcely agree with it. It is easy to prove that we can only learn emotional feelings, such as love and care, through real life experience. If there were no lessons we learn in life that come from our participation in situations, we would never learn how to get along with others or how to have self-respect.


On the other hand, students make a project successful that knowledge acquired through experience is definitely far better than a purely theoretical knowledge. Under no circumstances will you trust a doctor with no experience but book knowledge instead of a professional doctor with at least 10 years of experience, neither do I. In some areas, especially laboratory course, such as experimental physics and experimental chemistry, a theory can only be accepted after a considerable quantity of experiment. Lacking this, those who pronounce a new concept or theoretical assumption are at best arm chair thinkers whose mental agility will soon fade away and be forgotten by the society. Beneficial as knowledge gained from experience never fails to be, knowledge from books also have several advantages. Apparently, every single person's experience is limited so that we had better to absorb theoretical knowledge extensively. This, in essence, consists of the history of our race, the discoveries we have made, the accumulated knowledge and experience of age. In other words, theoretical knowledge also originates from experience.


In conclusion, I maintain that knowledge gained from experience is mo important than knowledge gained from books.

bill5865UID: 3109557

首先题目是不是错了，建议你参照作文组得任务来写，这样也有个比较。建议你把第一段再加点东西，如果光介绍什么是knowledge，并没有表明你自己的观点啊
Knowledge is a (kind of)再加个kind有点罗嗦，或者直接用knowledge allows tool that allows people to be aware of information, including theoretical and practical, that（and）并列 promotes our daily life.5 a3 g# g9 d! ^5 X7 U  U
Some people may argue that knowledge from books is more crucial.Though their argument may sound reasonable, I scarcely agree with it.这一句做承接还不错(It is easy to prove that we can only learn emotional feelings, such as love and care, through real life experience.) Actually, it is easy to prove some very crucial knowledge related to emotional feelings, such as love and care, can only be learned from real life experience.建议用换成这样，不然你前面讲并非书里有更多crucial的知识，后面马上讲生活中能学到情感性的feeling，相隔远了一些。我觉得上面那种写法衔接更加紧密。If there were was no lesson(s) we learn in life that comes from our participation in situations, we would never learn how to get along with others or how to have self-respect.这里建议加一些具体的例子吧，单单的讲道理不够有说服力
z, K4 d8 H' Q
(On the other hand, students make a project successful that knowledge acquired through experience is definitely far better than a purely theoretical knowledge.) On the other hand, knowledge acquired through experience like making a poject is definitely more useful than a purely theoretical knowledge. students和理论知识是不能比较的Under no circumstances will you trust a doctor with no experience but book knowledge instead of a professional doctor with at least 10 years of experience, neither do I. In some areas, especially laboratory course, such as experimental physics and experimental chemistry, a theory can only be accepted after a considerable quantity of experiment. Lacking this, those who pronounce a new concept or theoretical assumption are at best arm chair thinkers whose mental agility（ability） will soon fade away and be forgotten by the society. Beneficial as knowledge gained from experience never fails(to be).

由于让步，建议换一段

Knowledge from books also have several advantages. Apparently, every single person's experience is limited
so that we had (better) to absorb theoretical knowledge extensively. This, in essence, consists of the history of our race, the discoveries we have made, the accumulated knowledge and experience of age. In other words, theoretical knowledge also originates from experience.
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In conclusion, I maintain that knowledge gained from experience is more important than knowledge gained from books.

sixjjleighUID: 2918719

2# bill5865


改的很细，非常感谢~~~~感觉我的水平不够改你的作文啊~~~~~~就参考参考吧~~~~~~

byebyehakuUID: 3124349

色色的8.6作文还没发上来啊~~~
这里是我的作文 我们一组的说~~
欢迎批改~

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... p;extra=&page=2

sixjjleighUID: 2918719

4# byebyehaku
我给你改过了，不过不知道怎么批量改字体的颜色，用word编辑的下划线发上来也全都没了~~~不知怎么回事，应该还能看懂~~~~

season08UID: 2667789

6号作文是不是还没写？哼哼哼哼，快点写啦！:p

奔跑蜗牛UID: 2579189

Knowledge is a kind of tool that allows people to be aware of information, including theoretical and practical, that promotes our daily life. what's your meaning? Please clear it.

奔跑蜗牛UID: 2579189

主题句不明确啊