A35 求修改~ 大谢！【版主shinian已批改 2楼】

星露UID: 2643148

35.
The following appeared in a letter from the owner of the Sunnyside Towers apartment complex to its manager.
"One month ago, all the showerheads in the first three buildings of the Sunnyside Towers complex were modified to restrict maximum water flow to one-third of what it used to be. Although actual readings of water usage before and after the adjustment are not yet available, the change will obviously result in a considerable savings for Sunnyside Corporation, since the corporation must pay for water each month. Except for a few complaints about low water pressure, no problems with showers have been reported since the adjustment. I predict that modifying showerheads to restrict water flow throughout all twelve buildings in the Sunnyside Towers complex will increase our profits even more dramatically."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.

In this argument, the manager predicts that modifying showerheads will increase their profits based on some evidences of the first three buildings. However, three questions should be answered to determine whether such prediction is reliable.

To begin with, do the water usage increase or decrease after modifying showerheads? This is a critical question to be answered. If more water or nearly the same amount of water is used after the adjustment, the assumption that the change will result in considerable savings cannot be justified. If so, there lack sufficient evidences to support the prediction. Thus the manager cannot take for granted that water usage will decrease after the adjustment.

Secondly, how many people who are complaining about lower water pressure? The argument does not provide any data about the number of complaints. If there are a large amount people complaining, the policy of modifying showerheads may be opposed by them. Thus the opinions of residents should be carefully considered before adopting the policy. In order to better understand what the residents think about the policy, a detailed survey might be needed.

Thirdly, are the situations of the twelve buildings the same? If the requirements about water pressure of residents in the other nine buildings are higher than that in the first three buildings, the policy might be complained more or even opposed the rest nine buildings. Perhaps water usage in other buildings are much lower, modifying showerheads in these buildings might cause the problem of over-low water pressure, which might inhibit proper water usage. If there are such or other differences among these buildings, possible problems should be considered fully beforehand.

To sum up, there are still three questions about the policy. These questions are about the actual water usage after the adjustment, residents’ opinions about the policy, the situations of all the twelve buildings. If these questions are not answered, it cannot be proved that the prediction is justifiable.

shinian1987UID: 2797009

In this argument, the manager predicts that modifying showerheads will increase their profits based on some evidences of the first three buildings. However, three questions should be answered to determine whether such prediction is reliable. （开头很简洁。）

To begin with, do the water usage increase or decrease after modifying showerheads? This is a critical question to be answered. If more water or nearly the same amount of water is used after the adjustment, the assumption that the change will result in considerable savings cannot be justified. If so, there lack sufficient evidences to support the prediction. Thus the manager cannot take for granted that water usage will decrease after the adjustment. （这个攻击点很好，从你文章的字数来看，可以再稍微展开谈一谈，比如说水流小了，人们洗澡的时间变得更长了，以至用水量增加了。）

Secondly, how many people who are complaining about lower water pressure? The argument does not provide any data about the number of complaints. If there are a large amount people complaining, the policy of modifying showerheads may be opposed by them. Thus the opinions of residents should be carefully considered before adopting the policy. In order to better understand what the residents think about the policy, a detailed survey might be needed. （这个攻击点的表述有问题，应该质疑其调查范围。作者论述的时候提到了a few, 你就没有必要说 a large number, 你可以质疑他的调查范围，以及对complaint的理解。）

Thirdly, are the situations of the twelve buildings the same? If the requirements about water pressure of residents in the other nine buildings are higher than that in the first three buildings, the policy might be complained more or even opposed the rest nine buildings. Perhaps water usage in other buildings are much lower, modifying showerheads in these buildings might cause the problem of over-low water pressure, which might inhibit proper water usage. If there are such or other differences among these buildings, possible problems should be considered fully beforehand. （这个攻击点也不错，表述也很合理）

To sum up, there are still three questions about the policy. These questions are about the actual water usage after the adjustment, residents’ opinions about the policy, the situations of all the twelve buildings. If these questions are not answered, it cannot be proved that the prediction is justifiable.

文章没有基本语法问题，希望LZ继续保持。句式也还可以，文章的字数偏少了点，LZ可以扩展论证部分。
整体来看还是不错的。
Go fighting.

星露UID: 2643148

2# shinian1987

非常感谢您提的宝贵意见~ 这对我是很大的鼓励，我会仔细修改。谢谢~

viykoUID: 3184917

:) 考试资料和考试体会，同时希望大家踊跃提问，本论坛将对资料进行及时总结，按时发布每月机经

星露UID: 2643148

根据shinian1987的意见，修改后的文章，再次感谢shinian1987~

In the letter from the apartment owner to its manager, the owner predicts that modifying showerheads in all buildings will increase their profits based on unproved or inaccurate evidences about water usage and residents' complaints about the adjustment. In order to evaluate whether the prediction is reliable, three following questions should be answered.

The first critical question is whether actual water usage decreases or not after modifying the showerheads. Perhaps residents use showerheads for longer periods of time to meet their demands of water. Thus residents might use the same amount of water or even more even if water usage per minute decreases. Without eliminating the possibility, it is unconvincing that the adjustment will result in considerable savings. Accurate readings about water usage are critical for evaluating whether the prediction is reliable.

Secondly, in the letter the owner mentioned that there were a few complaints about the low water pressure, to show that not too many people feel that the adjustment caused trouble for their life. Is the speculation reliable? In order to answer the question, details about the complaints should be taken into account. How were these complaints collected by the owner? If the owner only heard a few complaints when walking in the three buildings or learnt them from friends living there, actual opinions about showerhead adjustment might be misrepresented or ignored. Without detailed information about the residents’ opinions, the conclusion that residents do not complain much about water usage is not reliable.

The last question to be answered is whether the situations of other nine buildings are similar to the first three buildings? The owner does not provide any information about it. It is possible that the requirements about water usage of the other buildings are higher than those in the first three building. Or perhaps water pressure is lower in other buildings, and the adjustment causes so low water pressure that residents cannot use water any more. If there are such differences, restraining water pressure might cause greater trouble to the residents in other departments. The serious result might be that they oppose to the change or even move away from the apartments. If so, instead of anticipating greater the apartment complex's profits, the owner might face great economic loss.

Thus the three questions should be answered first before taking further actions of modifying showerheads in other buildings. Or else, the adjustment might be opposed by residents in the buildings, which might further bring economic loss to the apartment complex. In order to answer the question, detailed surveys about actual water usage after adjustment, residents' opinions and other situations of other 9 buildings should be done. After attaining substantial information about these questions, the effect of the adjustment might be predicted more accurately.