ISSUE句式之四 再谈句式多样性

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雅思写作技巧：怎样使句子多样化  

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      一篇好文章的条件很多。除了内容丰富和组织紧密之外，词汇的运用和句子的处理，也起着决定性作用。
　　句子可长可短，同一件事，可以用不同的句式表达。如果句子清一色是简单句，文章必定很单调乏味。如果全篇充满了冗长的复杂句，读起来也很费力。最好的方法是以简单句为基础，配合适当的并列句和复杂句。简单句可长可短，通常要加些附属成分，如分词短语、介词短语、副词短语、不定式动词短语，以及节缩成分。

　　总之，作者可根据情况，使句子多样化，使文章灵活多姿。例如下列五个句子的基本概念一样，但是句式不同，内容重点也有些差别：

　　(1) The goats grazed peacefully in the farm and were unaware of the approaching hunter. (并列分句(1)+2)

　　(2) Grazing peacefully, the goats in the farm were unaware of the approaching hunter. (现在分语短语+简单句)

　　(3) In the farm, the goats grazed peacefully and were unaware of the approaching hunter. (副词短语+并列分句(1)-(2) )

　　(4) There were goats grazing peacefully in the farm, unaware of the approaching hunter. (简单句+形容语短语)

　　(5) As the goats grazed peacefully in the farm, they were unaware of the approaching hunter. (原因副词从句+主句)

　　(1)和(5)的句式最常见；如果加上其他三种互相交替，句子不是更多样化吗？

　　最后，看看这两个句子要如何多样化呢？

　　(6) The young pilot was on his first overseas training.

　　(7) He felt very uneasy.

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　　(a) The young pilot on his first overseas training felt very uneasy.

　　(b) The young pilot felt very uneasy during his first overseas training.

　　(c) The young pilot''''''''s first overseas training made him feel very uneasy.

　　(d) Extreme uneasiness seized the young pilot on his first overseas training.

　　(e) The young pilot was on his first overseas training, feeling very uneasy.

　　(f) It being his first overseas training, the young pilot felt very uneasy.

　　(g) Being on his first overseas training, the young pilot felt very uneasy.

　　(h) The young pilot was on his first overseas training and felt very uneasy.

　　(i) The young pilot, who was on his first overseas training, felt very uneasy.

　　(j) When the young pilot was on his/first overseas trainging, he felt very uneasy.

　　(k) As the young pilot was on his first overseas training, he felt very uneasy.

　　(l) The young pilot was on his first overseas training, so that he felt very uneasy.

　　在上述12个句子中，(a)-(g)是简单句；(h)是并列句；(i)-(l)是复杂句。简单句除(b)和(g)之外，其他五样，用的人并不多。人们最喜欢采用复杂句，尤其是(j)和(k)这两款；接着便是并列句(h)。如果大多数人的句子只限于(b),(g), (h), (j)和(k)这五种，而其他的则弃如敝屣，不是很可惜吗？

　　增强英语语句表现力的有效方法

　　一、避免使用语意弱的“be”动词。

　　1、把句中的表语转换为不同的修饰语。例如：

　　Weak: The trees are bare. The grass is brown. The landscape seems drab. Revision:The brown grass and bare trees form a drab landscape. (转换为前置定语)

　　Or: The landscape, bare and brown, begged for spring green. (转换为并列结构作后置定语)

　　2、将作表语用的形容词或名词变为行为动词。例如：

　　1) Weak: The team members are good players.

　　Revision: The team members play well.

　　2) Weak: One worker's plan is the elimination of tardiness.

　　Revision: One worker's plan eliminates tardiness.

　　3、在以“here”或“there”开头的句子中，把“be”动词后的名词代词变成改写句的主语。例如：

　　1) Weak: There is no opportunity for promotion.

　　Revision: No opportunity for promotion exists.

　　2) Weak: Here are the books you ordered.

　　Revision: The books you ordered have arrived.

　　二、多用语意具体的动词，保持句意简洁明了。例如：

　　1、Poor: My supervisor went past my desk.

　　Better: My supervisor sauntered (=walked slowly) past my desk.

　　2、Poor: She is a careful shopper.

　　Better: She compares prices and quality.

　　三、尽量运用主动语态。例如：

　　1、Weak: The organization has been supported by charity.

　　Better: Charity has supported the organization.

　　2、Weak: The biscuits were stacked on a plate.

　　Better: Mother stacked the biscuits on a plate.

　　四、防止使用语意冗长累赘的词语。例如：

　　1、Wordy: My little sister has a preference for chocolate milk.

　　Improved: My little sister prefers chocolate milk.

　　2、Wordy: We are in receipt of your letter and intend to follow your recommendations.

　　Improved: We have received your letter and intended to follow your recommendation.

　　3、Redundant: We had a serious crisis at school yesterday when our chemistry laboratory caught fire.

　　Improved: We had a crisis at school yesterday when our chemistry laboratory caught fire.

　　4、Redundant: My sister and I bought the same, identical dress in different stores.

　　Improved: My sister and I bought the same dress in different stores.

　　五、杜绝滥用陈旧词语或难懂的专业术语。例如：

　　1、Weak: They will not agree to his proposals in any shape or form.

　　Improved: They will not agree to any of his proposals.

　　2、Weak: I need her financial input before I can guesstimate our expenditures next fall.

　　Improved: I need her financial figures before I can estimate our expenditures next fall.

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thanks, xshs_5--nake angel?