Fine. Why Not?

小硕鼠UID??3411565

joycedeverno 发表于 2013-11-15 23:26
汉子就不能有柔情似水的一面嘛～天色不早了～基友早安息

哎呀哎呀平白无故多了一个好基友，太棒了

安啦安啦，期待你再发好贴

joycedevernoUID??3313960

小硕鼠 发表于 2013-11-15 23:31
哎呀哎呀平白无故多了一个好基友，太棒了

安啦安啦，期待你再发好贴

小硕鼠UID??3411565

妹子最近可好

joycedevernoUID??3313960

我特别讨厌 别人把路放在我面前让我选
我特别讨厌 你跟我讲我所说的多不现实
讨厌默默地和别人都一样 也会很害怕和别人不一样

I've spent all the most precious time in my life waiting for that right one sharing my weirdness, complementing my scaredness and believing that person actually exists.
Never have I ever been right about that.
Face. I'm done with it.

They will tell you you can't sleep alone in a strange place
Then they'll tell you you can't sleep with somebody else
Ah, but sooner or later you sleep in your own space
Either way it's okay
You wake up with yourself

I don't need you to worry for me cause I'm alright
I don't want you to tell me it's time to come home
I don't care what you say anymore, this is my life
Go ahead with your own life and leave me alone

I never said you had to offer me a second chance
I never said I was a victim of circumstance
I still belong, don't get me wrong
And you can speak your mind
But not on my time
I don't care what you say anymore, this is my life
Go ahead with your own life and leave me alone



Cap ou pas cap?

_______________________________________________________________________________

I'm not sure about what a long slash means, but I feel like I really need one. A seriously thick one.
Would that make any change?
Could that rectify any situation?
Does that indicate any closure?

I wish you could tell me.

June 10, 2015

Sometimes I cry so hard.
I even couldn't stop to remember the reason that made me cry.



June 11, 2015

当地华人教会组织大家去普林斯顿玩
中途把众人带到了一个教堂企图感化大家入教

一遍一遍的带着你唱着圣歌 视频里放着那些找到灵魂归宿的少女独白

其实单纯的艺术 最有一种莫名的力量

记得Modern Master里
光透过彩色的窗 洒在教堂的椅子上
Alastair面对着Martisse用最后的时光完成的生命之树感动的只有眼泪 说不出话
我便不知所以的跟着哭了起来

听着Amazing Grace 看着虔诚的牧师写下的故事 被世人一代代地传唱
插着耳机 我停下了飞敲键盘的手指 幻觉里仿佛抬头就可有耶稣仰望

宗教与艺术的完美结合 也许是一种神圣不可亵渎的信仰

普林的教堂里 歌声回荡
我真的有见到我周围一起从费城过来的同学唱着唱着 就流下了眼泪

“加入我们吧 从此你就有了最亲的兄弟姐妹”
“站起来吧 让主包容你 我们陪着你 不再害怕与孤单”

泣不成声来形容前排一位香港女生毫不夸张
她微微颤抖地站起来拥抱住另一位也是刚刚在歌声中站起来表示入会的白发奶奶

看到这样的场景 我和旁边几位大陆同学相视皱眉 惊叹不能理解
紧挨着我的教会慕溪组组长 文瑞 不断地俯视着我 同时暗示我们也该站起来

可惜我们不想骗人 不想骗他们说 我们是你们的一员
可惜中国大陆爱国主义教育做的太好 马克思主义无神论根深蒂固 不可动摇
对不起 我们就是冥顽不化 心无神灵的荒蛮之徒
也许以后都不会改变了吧

文瑞皱眉问我 你难道就一点都没有被感动么 你一点也感受不到主的恩德么
我不好意思说什么 只能笑一笑
心想 主在教会让我们一遍遍唱的这首歌里就把我抛弃了

“黑夜里 一直一直 我孤单一人哭泣
风雨中 主抱紧我 为我遮蔽
擦去我泪水 帮助我前行
黑夜里 这样的一双手 是我永远的依靠”


That doesn't make sense.
That is ridiculous to me.
I did have been through some dark nights. Surely there was nobody for me.

And I tell you what.
Thrown back into that kind of situation again, I assure you that no one would be there for me either.
Even if there was someone, anyone, they wouldn't save me.
'Cause they couldn't.

Only I could save myself
Sorry for not being able to be a believer
I even can't pretend to be one
For I believe that
Only I could be my salvation.