ISSUE58 请大侠们多指教

VonGoneUID: 152284

Issue58: The increasingly rapid pace of life today causes more problems than it solves.

The advancement of science and technology has induced the intense competition among companies, which in turn demand more harsh requirements on their employees, resulting in rapid tempo of life. No doubt  the rapid pace of life provides high efficiency and contributes to the development of society, while at the same time, it places great pressure on people and causes many physical and mental problems.

People suffer physical problems from overtime work and continuous hard work. In modern times, companies have to urge their employees to work hard to enhance their profits and their competitive capability in order to keep a sustainable success. For example, a manager must handle immediately all of problems emerged unexpectedly  within a certain time and has to make plans for future work. All these jobs often can not be finished in work time while they are urgent to be treated ,so managers often work over time, and in some cases, they may work 12 hours a day instead of stipulated 8 hours. When they get home, they may feel rather tired and can not have any interest in other things, such as reading, going to cinema or watching TV and spending enough time on family gatherings. Furthermore, as the competition prompts people to continue to study in order to keep pace of the development of science and technology to avoid being left behind and to acquire competency among their peers. This task also places an overload on modern people. Leisure time is increasingly becoming less, and people have no time to take part in sports or exercises to build their bodies. What's more, the widespread use of computer also brings severe harm to the eyes of employees, resulting in more poor eyesight.

Another side effect of pressure of busy lifestyle is emotional and mental problems of people due to being exposed to long-term tension and high pressure. Despite the above mentioned physical problems, people suffers more from mental disorders. People have to contemplate all kinds of complex problems in their work in order to find a more effective way to solve these problems. For example, an engineer in a R&D group of a electronic company have to collect as many as possible materials in order to make his or her product competitive in the potential market because the rapid development of electronic technology has result in a shorter lifespan of electronic products. Therefore, the designer has to put forward the most popular plan with great effort. He or she may keep a variety of ideas in the mind even at times of sleep. Thus, the mind can not have rest but run around clock. Prolonged tension with brain would causes mental problems,such as schizophrenia. In consequence, mental pressure has led to prosperity of psychology. More and more people turn to psychologist for relief.

With the rapid development of science and technology, people have to suffer more from the continuously increasing pace of life. People have no choice but take measures to adjust lifestyle and keep a balance between work and rest. In addition, government and social organizations should pay more attention to this worldwide issue to find a more effective way to alleviate people's sufferings.

VonGoneUID: 152284

非常感谢I-Sunshine仁兄的修改和中肯意见。Rapid 和tired之间确实需要一个承接加以说明，否则有些突然。前面的一局 to....to...不自然，以后写作要尽量避免。还有就是语言的变化少，虽然单词比较熟悉，但是在写作时却忘得一干二净。不知大家是如何解决的。
再次感谢！希望我在进步 中也能为大家尽微薄之力。