issue9 （revised by triumphbaby）

nk_abaUID: 153841

9"Academic disciplines have become so specialized in recent years that scholars' ideas reach only a narrow audience. Until scholars can reach a wider audience, their ideas will have little use."

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The development of human society is depended on the promoting of new ideas. Then what kind of ideas would be called useful to people? The writer asserts that a valuable thought should win a large number of proponents. In my opinion, however, the value of an idea should not be only decided by the number of persons accepting it.

Admittedly, under most circumstances, the extent to which an idea is accepted by people reflects assuredly its value. The best example I can think up is the success of Microsoft Inc. In 1983(maybe? hehe), Bill Gates, who founded Microsoft, promoted the concept of Desktop Operation System, which ended the period when computer seemed to be unfriendly to people, especially to those who had little computer skills. From then on, personal computers gradually are welcomed by more and more users, which makes Bill become the most wealth in the world at present.

However, such standard sometimes fails to reflect the real value of an idea. Some of us may have encountered such an experience - we may fell lonely in an debate for our view is different from the most, and we fell happy later because it is proved that we are right at last. I myself have experienced such a thing: in an exam, I got a different result from others including my teacher, but I stuck to my standpoint and proved finally my right. So something the most deem to be right is not necessarily true.

On the other hand, people are likely affected deeply by some ideas not understood easily by them. Mathematics, for example, as the one of the most essential discipline, has affected human thousands of years, and we can even say that almost every advance in the history of human science and technology must not lack mathematics. However, although widely applied in common life, mathematics is also difficult to be mastered by the most for its development has exceeded a few hundreds years human history.

Furthermore, there are also something valuable though not accepted by the masses. In the field of art, say, impressionists have offered us a good example. It is true that their works have a market in only a little percentage of population, such as experts in this field or some enthusiast, who pay their attention to them, and are often neglected by the most, however, undeniably, these paintings are still of high value. In fact, it is said that one of these paintings, sunflowers painting by Von Gogh, has become the most expensive painting in the world in an auction.

In a word, people should measure roundly the value of an idea from different angles as many as possible, such as its merit and vice, or its infections at present and in the future, but not simply from the standard whether it is easy for contemporary to understand. Even those thoughts which are not understood by people nowadays are likely accepted popularly in the future, after all, sometimes, truth is hold in the minority.

triumphbabyUID: 156432

"Academic disciplines have become so specialized in recent years that scholars' ideas reach only a narrow audience. Until scholars can reach a wider audience, their ideas will have little use."

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The development of human society is depended on（depends on） the promoting of new ideas. Then what kind of ideas would be called useful to people? The writer asserts that a valuable thought should win a large number of proponents. In my opinion, however, the value of an idea should not be only decided by the number of persons accepting it.（第一段还可以，但是depend on 用错了，直接说sth depends on sth 就好了，还有最后一句的persons，有点别扭，想想有没有更好的）

Admittedly, under most circumstances, the extent to which an idea is accepted by people reflects assuredly its value. The best example I can think up is the success of Microsoft Inc.
（Inc。是什么，我还真不知道）In 1983(maybe? hehe), Bill Gates, who founded Microsoft, promoted the concept of Desktop Operation System, which ended the period when computer seemed to be unfriendly to people, especially to those who had little computer skills. From then on, personal computers gradually are welcomed by more and more users, which makes Bill become the most wealth in the world at present.〔最后半句夸bill的化，好像没什么用。这段最大的问题是，你举完例子，就不管它了，总结哪去了，给你有头没尾的感觉，最重要的总结可以起到再次提醒读者你的论点，不然前面就是一团散沙啊。我觉得这段可以这样写，首先，可以讲一下一个discipline有用的定义。有用很多情况下并不只是停留在理论这一层面，更多的时候是实际应用的基础。大众更关注一个idea在现实生活中的应用，而对于那些应用过程中需要的技术，单独看，都只能reach little people，恐怕只有那些researchers才会真正明白，就像我知道电脑怎么用，但其具体的原理我并不知道一样，用户也确实不需要知道那些。那么我们能说那些idea没价值吗？当然不能。然后可以据微软的例子，In 1983, Bill Gates, who founded Microsoft, promoted the concept of Desktop Operation System, which ended the period when computer seemed to be unfriendly to people, especially to those who are not computer experts. From then on, the concept is accepted by numberless people, and proven to be a real invaluable invention.。没有人能否认微软的成功，但是分开看那些技术，又有多少人会明白呢？那些术语什么的，你自己调整一下，我就想表达一个思路。还有克隆技术，现在只应用于动物身上，更别说人了〕

However, such standard sometimes fails to reflect the real value of an idea. Some of us may have encountered such an experience - we may fell lonely in an debate for our view is different from the most, and we fell happy later because it is proved that we are right at last. I myself have experienced such a thing: in an exam, I got a different result from others including my teacher, but I stuck to my standpoint and proved finally my right. So something the most deem to be right is not necessarily true.〔这段给人的感觉有点肤浅，有点罗嗦，说来说去的没什么有分量的东东。其实你不是就想表达一个意思，那就是真理可能掌握在少数人手里吗？虽然说没有例子举就往自己身上贴，但是这个题目我觉得很好找例子啊，还有有些题目找身边的例子要比名人名事更好，但有些还是名人名事比较好，练习中能发现这一点，如果能有意识的选择例子当然是最好，这也是以有很多例子在脑子里为前提的，如果在考场真的想不起例子了，也就只好一致对待，都往自己身上靠了。好了，我觉得这段可以这样写，从另一方面看，随着社会的进步，学科分类越来越细，每个领域研究越来越深是人类进步，社会发展的必然结果，就像几百年前，人们不曾想过苹果为什么会落地，而现在人们已经探索其他的星球有没有人类居住一样。研究的深入必定导致更加高深，不易理解的idea出现，我们能说因为很多人的不理解，这个idea就没价值吗？最著名的例子就是爱因斯坦和他的相对论，别说在他的那个时代，就是在现在又有多少人能真正明白相对论的真谛呢？但是大家怎么评论爱因斯坦？他还不是历史上top的少数科学家之一？他的相对论还不是一样有价值？然后你在加上后面梵高的例子，当然还有毕加索，等等等等，太多了，不是吗？好，最后得出结论，单纯靠接受人的多少来衡量一个idea是否有价值是不行的。〕

On the other hand, people are likely affected deeply by some ideas not understood easily by them. Mathematics, for example, as the one of the most essential discipline, has affected human thousands of years, and we can even say that almost every advance in the history of human science and technology must not lack mathematics. However, although widely applied in common life, mathematics is also difficult to be mastered by the most for its development has exceeded a few hundreds years human history.
（这段你是不是想说，其实反倒是那些不易被人们理解的学科越是被更多的应用？观点提的不明确，我最初就没理解你这段和主题有什么关系。其实好像和我的第一个论点有点相似，就是人们注重应用效果，而不是那些产生这些效果的背后理论，是这样吗？是的化，就没必要单起一段了，delete吧。例子觉得不好没说浮力。）

Furthermore, there are also something valuable though not accepted by the masses. In the field of art, say, impressionists have offered us a good example. It is true that their works have a market in only a little percentage of population, such as experts in this field or some enthusiast, who pay their attention to them, and are often neglected by the most, however, undeniably, these paintings are still of high value. In fact, it is said that one of these paintings, sunflowers painting by Von Gogh, has become the most expensive painting in the world in an auction.（最后，由于科技的进步，学科分化加细，也出现的很多新兴的领域，因为它们是新兴的，在很大程度上是空白，可能处在起步的阶段，reach的audience也可能很少，但是它们的重要性确是不可忽略的，可能开启了先河，填补了空白。再比如环境科学的研究（呵呵，my turn），在发展中国家，人们的环境意识还不强，对这门学科也没什么了解。但是解决环境问题，确是必须的。还可以找更好的例子。
In a word, people should measure roundly the value of an idea from different angles as many as possible, such as its merit and vice（demerit）, or（去掉or比较好） its infections at present and in the future, but not simply from (by) the standard whether it is easy for contemporary to understand.（这句话好像不是原题的意思，注意原题是idea reach only a narrow audience,能understand只是其中的一种情况吧，这个改写有点问题，我对这个题目想了好久，总觉得有些不妥，可以该成but not simply by the level that people can reach them.） Even those thoughts which are not understood by people nowadays are likely accepted popularly in the future(Even those thoughts which are not reached by many people today may possibly have significant effect in the futher), after all, sometimes, truth is hold in the minority.（注意最后一段应该是全文的总结，不能只总结其中一两个论点,我有点怀疑，真理掌握在少数人手里，到底能不能当论据，好像和题目不符，题目是说idea的应用范围，而不是说对错的问题，你觉得呢？我们一会再讨论这个结尾吧。说实话，我对这个作文题有点疑问，尤其是我举的爱因斯坦的例子，不太sure，我们一会再讨论。）
Summy：在有些方面有进步，文章比上一片结构复杂了，但是实质内容并不太好，有点凑字数的感觉。注意每段之后的总结，别让人觉得有头无尾。结尾要注意总结全篇，而不是其中一两个论点。注意研究题目，多读几次，理解准确。看看别人的作文，比如最近的donald的issue9吧，比较一下。

caleUID: 150437

楼主是南开大学的吧？

paisleyUID: 64183

楼主似乎没意识到有人改你的文章了？triumphbaby给你改的这么详细，你不来看，不来谢谢他，不大好吧？

triumphbabyUID: 156432

他有谢我啊，呵呵。