寄托天下
查看: 2780|回复: 7
打印 上一主题 下一主题

[优秀习作] issue50 第一次关了金山,电子词典,真有点力不从心,不过,很有收获 [复制链接]

Rank: 2

声望
0
寄托币
557
注册时间
2004-1-25
精华
0
帖子
4
跳转到指定楼层
楼主
发表于 2004-3-4 11:09:42 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
【50】. In order to improve the quality of instruction at the college and university
level, all faculty should be required to spend time working outside the
academic world in professions relevant to the courses they teach. 【50】
观点:基本同意观点
1,        如果只让老师们局限于理论研究,书本的教学,而不去实践,1,老师的理论水平很难有大的突破,甚至思路枯竭,(2)讲授没有活力,参与性不高,学生学不到鲜活的,实用的知识,
2,        果让老师门到学术领域外的与相对课程有关的领域中锻炼,(1)老师们可从实践中得到鲜货的东西来充实自己的理论,从而促进教学和自己的研究。(2)学生不仅可以学到扎实的理论知识,还可以了解更多的来只社会的鲜货的实践技巧,丰富了学生的知识面,比如,法律中理想与现实的差距等,一个律师职责(3)(3)实际生产中要求一些意识, 比如保护环境,老师通过实践,会很有体会,比如百事可乐,通过讲授使学生环抱意识正强。
3,但不能要求太死,使得如历史,数学等学科老师被迫浪费时间。还有注意时间的分配,不能影响正常教学。

People can take all kinds of measures to improve the quality of instruction at college and university level. Requiring faculty to attend professions being linked to courses they teach is one of the best way of them, although it is, to some extent, little unreasonable to require all faculty to do so.

Firstly, if faculties completing their instructions only in means of researching theory and passing knowledge coming from books but not to practicein those professinal(professional) fields relevantto the courses they teach, then after a long time their instructions will show several flaws. In the first place, it is hard for these faculties to have a breakthrough in level of theory researching and even there will be no fresh ideas to full in their minds. For example, if a low teacher has never took part in the course of judgment,it is difficult for him/her to deeply understand how to cope with the complicated relationship between knowledge from books and practical treatment of problems being relevant to low. In such way, lack of practical experience will fetter their minds. In the second place, their instructions will be difficult to pass on fresh and practical knowledge to students because they have unsufficient (insufficient)knowledge, which is summarized according to their practical experience. After all, not only does nuclear knowledge include nuclear reaction but also contains how to make the reaction occur.

In contrast, if teachers can spend some time working outside the academic world in professions relevant to the courses they teach, both themselves and their students can benefit from the experience. Firstly, their instructions will run over with fresh air. For example, a teacher who teaching a subject called " how to construct a greenhouse" in an argriculture(agriculture)university will explain the process of constructing a greenhouse more lively if he/she has spent a period of time on a farm or a flower company taking part in the course of constructing. Secondly, students can understand teacher's instruction more easily because the fresh story, which presumably happens around them, has been added to their teacher's instruction. For instance, one of the most popular architecture professor in my university has been the manage of a construction company. When we attend his class, such a complex and dull subject-design structure of building, becomes very easy to comprehend as result of lively explanations on how to design a popular and solid structure of a building. In the thirdly place, this messure(measure)will help to boost students' abilities to turn theory to account and make them be aware of the distance between more earlier. A good case in point is that law professors always tell their students that all human beings are equal facing law. but when the student graduates and works as a lawyer, his/her workmates possibly tell him that his only task is to argue for his customer. If professors participate in profession field as a temporary lawyer, it is more likely that their students can share their professional experience. In the third place, students are able to be aware of the significance of protecting environment more profoundly by listening to the instruction of a professor who has worked temporarily in a environment protecting organization than the instruction merely from a book. Finally, the working experience in the practical world helps college and university teachers to design their courses according to the needs of the professional fields.

However, It is unreasonable to require all faculty to spending time working in the professions relevant to their teaching courses. For example, teachers in some disciplines like history and mathematics might have little necessity to waste time in so-called professions. After all, for them, it is little difficult to combine their teaching with relevant professional fields. For example, it seems hard to find a line drawn between the Civil War and some profession. In addition, how long will those faculties play a part as a temporary worker? Is it necessary for these teachers to spend so much time in professional fields that influence their normal instruction? Hence, if a leader merely considers those benefits discussed above without any idea of these questions, he/she would not be a wise leader.

In sum, not only do teachers benefit from the experience of taking part in the relevant professions, but also the students can do. If college and university can take this measure with regard for the peculiarity of those disciplines such as history, mathematics, and make a available arrangement about the time teachers spending on it, the students will benefits more from their teachers' instruction
0 0

使用道具 举报

Rank: 2

声望
0
寄托币
557
注册时间
2004-1-25
精华
0
帖子
4
沙发
发表于 2004-3-4 14:27:40 |只看该作者
感觉自己写的象4,6 级作文,一想到还有14 天考试,汗呀

使用道具 举报

Rank: 2

声望
0
寄托币
557
注册时间
2004-1-25
精华
0
帖子
4
板凳
发表于 2004-3-4 18:57:41 |只看该作者
斑竹呀,你什么时候来呀, 我快顶不住了!!

使用道具 举报

Rank: 16Rank: 16Rank: 16Rank: 16

声望
266
寄托币
22475
注册时间
2003-7-14
精华
88
帖子
188

荣誉版主 Sub luck

地板
发表于 2004-3-4 19:05:52 |只看该作者
稍等,我一边吃饭一边看好了。一下午都在整理版面呢。
Rien de réel ne peut être menacé.
Rien d'irréel n'existe.

使用道具 举报

Rank: 16Rank: 16Rank: 16Rank: 16

声望
266
寄托币
22475
注册时间
2003-7-14
精华
88
帖子
188

荣誉版主 Sub luck

5
发表于 2004-3-4 19:21:34 |只看该作者
下次最好不要点名叫斑竹。

文章中小错误我懒得一一指出,连law都写成了low,我觉得你自己应该预先检查过吧?

例子不少,但是nuclear和civil war我没看明白什么意思。看看我以前写过的两个跟例子有关的每日一评。

论点比较乱,一开始就自己反驳自己:beneficial and unreasonable,这算什么?
body1 2都并不算深入,in the third place还写了两遍
body3 又开始提出要分学科(如果要提为什么不早提?)
而且body3那么多缺点把前面都否定了,整篇文章变成什么?

组织不慎导致了self contradictory严重。

自己好好检查检查。
Rien de réel ne peut être menacé.
Rien d'irréel n'existe.

使用道具 举报

Rank: 2

声望
0
寄托币
557
注册时间
2004-1-25
精华
0
帖子
4
6
发表于 2004-3-4 21:08:05 |只看该作者
多谢斑竹百忙之中的指点,偶感激.首先认错,不该喊.
我就是觉得用词力不从心,我的思想表达不出来,自己看也很难找到错误,我以前看过您和另一个新斑竹关于表达和思想的讨论,现在是深切的体会到您意思了,
偶想请教斑竹,14天之内,我能改变本片作文的幼稚用词吗?
有什么招吗,急盼斑竹赐教呀!

使用道具 举报

Rank: 16Rank: 16Rank: 16Rank: 16

声望
266
寄托币
22475
注册时间
2003-7-14
精华
88
帖子
188

荣誉版主 Sub luck

7
发表于 2004-3-4 22:38:00 |只看该作者
我没感觉你用词幼稚
我感觉到的是你拼写错误

用词弱智一点都不是太大的问题
law写成了low谁能猜到??

杜绝拼写错误,表达力求准确对应意思,没什么更多的技巧。先把基本的做好就是很大的成果了。
Rien de réel ne peut être menacé.
Rien d'irréel n'existe.

使用道具 举报

Rank: 16Rank: 16Rank: 16Rank: 16

声望
6
寄托币
55070
注册时间
2001-9-3
精华
211
帖子
415

Aries白羊座 荣誉版主

8
发表于 2004-3-6 08:53:01 |只看该作者
In order to improve the quality of instruction at the college and university
level, all faculty should be required to spend time working outside the
academic world in professions relevant to the courses they teach. 【50】
观点:基本同意观点
1, 如果只让老师们局限于理论研究,书本的教学,而不去实践,1,老师的理论水平很难有大的突破,甚至思路枯竭,(2)讲授没有活力,参与性不高,学生学不到鲜活的,实用的知识,
2, 果让老师门到学术领域外的与相对课程有关的领域中锻炼,(1)老师们可从实践中得到鲜货的东西来充实自己的理论,从而促进教学和自己的研究。(2)学生不仅可以学到扎实的理论知识,还可以了解更多的来只社会的鲜货的实践技巧,丰富了学生的知识面,比如,法律中理想与现实的差距等,一个律师职责(3)(3)实际生产中要求一些意识, 比如保护环境,老师通过实践,会很有体会,比如百事可乐,通过讲授使学生环抱意识正强。
3,但不能要求太死,使得如历史,数学等学科老师被迫浪费时间。还有注意时间的分配,不能影响正常教学。

People can take all kinds of measures to improve the quality of instruction at college and university level. Requiring faculty to attend professions being(being可去掉) linked to courses they teach is one of the best way of them, although it is, to some extent, (少a,a little 和a few是表示肯定意思的, little和 few是表示否定意思的)little unreasonable to require all faculty to do so.

Firstly, if faculties completing their instructions only in means of researching theory(conducting research即可) and passing knowledge coming from books but not to practicein those professinal(professional) fields relevantto the courses they teach这句话太长,费解, then after a long time their instructions will show several flaws. In the first place, it is hard for these faculties这个词不要一用到底,要换几个说法,比如teachers, professors,等等 to have a breakthrough in level of theory researching and even there will be no fresh ideas to full(应是fill) in their minds. For example, if a low teacher has never took(是taken) part in the course of judgment(这个是什么课?),it is difficult for him/her to deeply understand how to cope with the complicated relationship between knowledge from books and practical treatment of problems being relevant to low(最后几个词也很费解). In such way, lack of practical experience will fetter their minds. In the second place, their instructions will be difficult to(最好说it is difficult for them to ) pass on fresh and practical knowledge to students because they have unsufficient (insufficient)knowledge, which is summarized according to their practical experience. After all, not only does nuclear knowledge include nuclear reaction but also contains how to make the reaction occur.前半句话语序错误导致意思上出了偏差,应是nuclear knowledge not only includes nuclear reaction, but …..还有什么叫做nuclear knowledge?

In contrast, if teachers can spend some time working outside the academic world in professions relevant to the courses they teach这里问题也一样,要注意词汇的变化,不要同样一句话反复说, both themselves and their students can benefit from the experience. Firstly, their instructions will run over with fresh air. For example, a teacher who teaching(应是teaches) a subject called " how to construct a greenhouse" in an argriculture(agriculture)(不对,是agricultural)university will explain the process of constructing a greenhouse more lively if he/she has spent a period of time on a farm(应是farming,不然变成农庄) or a flower company taking part in the course of constructing. Secondly, students can understand teacher's instruction more easily because the fresh story, which presumably happens around them,这个逗号以后的后半句语法出错,和前面联系不上 has been added to their teacher's instruction. For instance, one of the most popular architecture professor in my university has been the manage of a construction company. When we attend his class, such(有such一般后面就有so 或as,如果没有,就不要轻易用这个词) a complex and dull subject-design structure of building, becomes very easy to comprehend as result of lively explanations on how to design a popular and solid structure of a building这句话实在太长,拆开说吧. In the thirdly place, this messure(measure)will help to boost students' abilities to turn theory to account and make them be aware of the distance between more earlier 后半句意义含混. A good case in point is that law professors always tell their students that all human beings are equal facing law. but when the student graduates and works as a lawyer, his/her workmates possibly tell him that his only task is to argue for his customer. If professors participate in profession field as a temporary lawyer, it is more likely that their students can share their professional experience. In the third place, students are able to be aware of the significance of protecting environment more profoundly by listening to the instruction of a professor who has worked temporarily in a environment protecting organization than the instruction merely from a book. Finally, the working experience in the practical world helps college and university teachers to design their courses according to the needs of the professional fields. 这段实在太长,完全不需要每有一个论点就举例,看的人很累

However, It is unreasonable to require all faculty to spending time working in the professions relevant to their teaching courses. For example, teachers in some disciplines like history and mathematics might have little necessity to waste time in so-called professions. After all, for them, it is little difficult to combine their teaching with relevant professional fields. For example, it seems hard to find a line drawn between the Civil War and some profession. In addition, how long will those faculties play a part as a temporary worker? Is it necessary for these teachers to spend so much time in professional fields that influence their normal instruction? Hence, if a leader merely considers those benefits discussed above without any idea of these questions, he/she would not be a wise leader.

In sum, not only do teachers benefit from the experience of taking part in the relevant professions, but also the students can do. If college and university can take this measure with regard for the peculiarity of those disciplines such as history, mathematics, and make a available arrangement about the time teachers spending on it, the students will benefits more from their teachers' instruction

Imong也说了你文章里还有不少拼写错误的词,你把文章粘贴到WORD里看一看就知道了:)我不改了

语言上的问题是长句太多,但是往往表意不明,还是拆成短句好,或者用连接词如and, but,however,等连接,不要老用which这些词。

说理上基本过关了,至少这篇就不错。但是我觉得实在没必要举那么多例子,惊愕。我想这么长的文章不可能在45分钟里写完的吧。还是学会怎么样在有限时间里把话说完且说清楚为好。
UA
我说人生哪,如果赏过一回痛哭淋漓的风景,写一篇杜鹃啼血的文章,与一个赏心悦目的人错肩,也就够了。不要收藏美、钤印美,让美随风而逝。生命最清醉的时候,是将万里长江视为一匹白绢,裂帛。(简桢)

使用道具 举报

RE: issue50 第一次关了金山,电子词典,真有点力不从心,不过,很有收获 [修改]

问答
Offer
投票
面经
最新
精华
转发
转发该帖子
issue50 第一次关了金山,电子词典,真有点力不从心,不过,很有收获
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-171010-1-1.html
复制链接
发送
回顶部