issue144, 超高频题，写得很艰难：（

denneUID: 156313

issue144:
It is the artist, not the critic,* who gives society something of lasting value.
*a person who evaluates works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings, etc.

Who gives society something of lasting value, the artist or the artist? Some people firmly advocate that the artist creates the essential works and gives lasting value to society. However, in my opinion, the relationship between artist and critic is just like the lips and teeth and the critic bears the same significance as the artist in this affair and can't be disregarded.

On one hand, it is the artist who creates the great works of art which influence our society. Art, is a way to express the artist's feeling, mood and attitude. The artist's creation can refine our souls. Generally speaking, the artist is a person who has active thoughts and various imaginations and he is skilled at catching the tiny changes of other person or even the society. The product of art is a reflection of the artist's contemporary customs and society. For example, let's take a look at Mrs. Stowe, who is well known for her antislavery novel Uncle Tom's Cabin. In the book, she details the harshness of plantation life in the South American. President Lincoln ever praised her (and I paraphrase): you are the little lady who wrote the book that made this big war. Until now, this novel is popular nearly all over the world. In this sense, Mrs. Stowe influences the development of the history and give lasting value for society.

On the other hand, only artist is not sufficient. The work of art is an expression of the artist's individual feelings and sometimes it is hard for other people to understand. Taking Van Gogh for example, few people could understand why this weird genius present us such a drab and flabby plant and in such an unusual way of using colors. Then, it is the critic's task to use his professional knowledge and help people to understand it. The critic let us take the painter's personal experience into count, and interpret these sunflowers are the confused and despond painter himself. What's more, the critic gives feedback to the artist. The purpose of art is to entertain the people. In order to improve his ability and better his works, the artist should know the strong points and the weak points of the products. Draw on the wisdom of the critic is very important. The critic can give some suggestions to them. Thus, the artist can create better works. Therefore, in this sense, it is the artist and critic work together and give society lasting values.

To sum up, the artist create the work of art which could beneficial our society. The critic make this kind of work could be understood by more people and give feedback to the artist. No one could outweigh the other. They work together and give lasting values to our society together.

denneUID: 156313

自己顶：（

九月爱上乒乓球UID: 151821

我来看 等~~

九月爱上乒乓球UID: 151821

Who gives society something of lasting value, [U]the artist or the artist? [/U]  Some people firmly advocate that the artist creates the essential works and gives lasting value to society. However, in my opinion, the relationship between artist and critic is just like the lips and teeth and the critic bears the same significance as the artist in this affair and can't be disregarded. (很好回应)

On one hand, it is the artist who creates the great works [U]of art [/U]  which influence(too vague) our society.[U] Art, is a way to express the artist's feeling, mood and attitude. The artist's creation can refine our souls. [/U] (这两句话之间没有什么逻辑关系) Generally speaking, the artist is a person who has active thoughts and various(不当) imaginations and he is skilled at catching the tiny(subtle如何?) changes of other person or even the society. [U]The product of art is a reflection of the artist's contemporary customs and society.[/U]  For example, let's take a look at Mrs. Stowe, who is well known for her antislavery novel Uncle Tom's Cabin. In the book, she details the harshness of plantation life in the South American. President Lincoln ever praised her (and I paraphrase): you are the little lady who wrote the book that made this big war. Until now, this novel is popular nearly all over the world. In this sense, Mrs. Stowe influences the development of the history and give lasting value for society.

这一段论证的结论是The product of art is a reflection of the artist's contemporary customs and society 但是却没有证明 give lasting value for society 后面的例子很好 但是用这样一句 Mrs. Stowe influences the development of the history and give lasting value for society. 跳了过去 这恰恰是你要证明的啊
还有我要质疑你的: 艺术作品不能反映作者的精神世界吗? 不能反映 一些思想吗? 这些不更是给人带来 lasting value吗?
实际从你下面的论证来看 这样写承接起来更自然


On the other hand, only artist is not sufficient. The work of art is an [U]expression of the artist's individual feelings [/U]  and sometimes it is hard for other people to understand. Taking Van Gogh for example, few people could understand why this weird genius present us such a drab and flabby plant and in such an unusual way of using colors. Then, it is the critic's task to use his professional knowledge and help people to understand it. The critic let us take the painter's personal experience into count, and interpret these sunflowers are the confused and despond painter himself. What's more, the critic gives feedback to the artist.(我觉得应该不是递进的关系, 并列) The purpose of art is to entertain the people. In order to improve his ability and better his works, the artist should know the strong points and the weak points of the products. Draw(ing) on(on 是不是应该删去 吸取vt) the wisdom of the critic is very important. The critic can give some suggestions to them. Thus, the artist can create better works. Therefore, in this sense, it is the artist and critic work together and give society lasting values.(总结的不错)

To sum up, the artist create the work of art which could beneficial(benefit) our society. The critic make this kind of work could be understood by more people and give feedback to the artist.  [U]No one could outweigh the other.[/U] (多余) They work together and give lasting values to our society together.

body一段需加强 例子不错

denneUID: 156313

谢谢九月爱上乒乓球
从上篇issue到这篇，你一直说的我得逻辑问题我好像有一点明白了，呵呵
以前关于限定什么的老是迷迷糊糊的，现在知道要把自己的思维过程全部展现出来，然后还有自然的承接。

BODY1 中的那个地方的确不好。我开始的时候在这儿停了好长时间，就是想不出用什么，呵呵，读起来应该很别扭的说
另外就是要照应。我那个应该在具体说说Mrs。Stowe的这本小说影响了美国人民对于黑奴制度的看法以及种族其实问题？
至于艺术给社会的lasting value 我到现在仍然不是很清楚，“艺术作品不能反映作者的精神世界吗”事讲individual的事情啊，给社会什么呢？可能我想的太狭隘了

BODY2 中的：Draw(ing) on(on 是不是应该删去 吸取vt) the wisdom of the critic is very important.
是我从集思广益改编的，集思广益在金山糍粑中是draw on the wisdom of the masses

再次谢谢，^_^

九月爱上乒乓球UID: 151821

对不起, 是我理解错了,刚才仔细的查了牛津高阶 是有这么一个意项: draw on sth 使用 利用(use)
谢谢拉
我在修改中讲的是我个人的一个理解,  艺术对人类的价值是体现很多方面的: 比如作者通过作品向世人宣扬优秀的品质和精神, 或是宣扬一种思想,介绍其他的文化等等都能给人带来lasting value啊 而你只说了一个方面 是不是太局限了呢?

ZZZ@MARYLANDUID: 157802

等一下：）

konieeUID: 158315

lasting value means what? Naturally , it is intended to make other persons know the remote matter that is usually neglected by them ,and coincidently,it is the crucial things that humanity is neccesarily needing .
你写的应更展开些,这样会更好

ZZZ@MARYLANDUID: 157802

Who gives society something of lasting value, the artist or the artist? Some people firmly advocate that the artist creates the essential works and gives lasting value to society. However, in my opinion, the relationship between artist and critic is just like the lips and teeth(这是什么比喻，我没有看出来两者的关系。建议换一个比喻。比如说：硬币等等) and the critic bears the same significance as the artist in this affair and can't be disregarded.

On one hand, it is the artist who creates the great works of art which influence our society（这是你的中心句，我觉得可以把influence改成lasting value，因为这是你所要论证的）. Art, is a way to express the artist's feeling, mood and attitude（最好再说上艺术是社会的一种反应，因为题目中说的是对社会的永恒价值）. The artist's creation can refine our souls(这是什么意思？这句话有什么意义么？如果没有什么用的话，建议删掉). Generally speaking（换成Admittedly吧，我看很多牛人都用，例文上也用到过，generally speaking好像有点像高中作文呢，呵呵）, the artist is a person who has active thoughts and various imaginations and he is skilled at catching the tiny(subtle如何?) changes of other person or even the society. The product of art is a reflection of the artist's contemporary customs and society. For example, let's take a look at Mrs. Stowe, who is well known for her antislavery novel Uncle Tom's Cabin. In the book, she details the harshness of plantation life in the South American. President Lincoln ever praised her (and I paraphrase): you are the little lady who wrote the book that made this big war. Until now, this novel is popular nearly all over the world. In this sense, Mrs. Stowe influences the development of the history and give lasting value for society.

你的这一段是要说艺术家对我们社会的影响，而且它的影响是有永久性质的。你很好的说出了影响，但是好像没有突出“lasting”这个特点。其实我觉得做一个很简单的修改就好，把所有的influence改成lasting value：）嘿嘿嘿，投机取巧啦，因为我觉得你这段用于证明lasting value也不错，只是事例上可能要作一些修改。因为你的事例讲的是influence，实在是没法突出lasting的特点：）

On the other hand, only artist is not sufficient. The work of art is an expression of the artist's individual feelings and sometimes it is hard for other people to understand. Taking Van Gogh for example, few people could understand why this weird genius present us such a drab and flabby plant and in such an unusual way of using colors. Then, it is the critic's task to use his professional knowledge and help people to understand it. The critic let us take the painter's personal experience into count, and interpret these sunflowers are the confused and despond painter himself. What's more, the critic gives feedback to the artist. The purpose of art is to entertain the people. In order to improve his ability and better his works, the artist should know the strong points and the weak points of the products. Draw on the wisdom of the critic is very important. The critic can give some suggestions to them. Thus, the artist can create better works. Therefore, in this sense, it is the artist and critic work together and give society lasting values.

这一段说出了lasting的特点。例子也很棒。呵呵，我写的时候怎么就没有想到呢，把你的例子记下来，不会介意吧？：）

To sum up, the artist create the work of art which （is） beneficial (to) our society. The critic make this kind of work could be understood by more people and give feedback to the artist. No one could outweigh the other. They work together and give lasting values to our society together.

整体来说，我第一眼看上去就觉得字数好像有点不够，GRE作文的经典性是不是“五段论”么？呵呵，争取再找出一个论点吧，充实一下整个文章：）

ZZZ@MARYLANDUID: 157802

https://bbs.gter.net/showthread.php?s=&threadid=176716

denneUID: 156313

谢谢楼上几位
哎，刚刚打了好多，全没了
我现在觉得写东西要果断些，想到什么就说什么。我老是去想让大家都接受我的观点。耽误时间，并且前思后想还想不清楚，ft~
这样看来你可以这样看这个问题，但是你不能干涉我那样看这个问题。嗬嗬，不过不要太过于离题。

又说到展开，55，koniee你能具体举个小例子说说吗？谢谢啦

ZZZ@MARYLAND，呆会我回去看得：）
先说这个：
开头的比喻我是想说唇齿相依，可能表达的不对吧，但是我觉得硬币不好吧，那是一个事物的两个方面。
BODY1: admittedly 是我朋友建议我要用的慎重，嗬嗬。不过它是有一个让步的意思吧，用在那儿不好。我个人对长句复杂词汇比较没有把握，嗬嗬，只好写简单的。艺术对于社会的影响我后面有写，你是不是觉得应该提前呢？偶写lasting就只能写到现在仍然流行，说影响了人们对于奴隶看法，还有……………………汗~
body2: 例子也是抄得别人的。嗬嗬，尽管用，记得paraphrase就可以拉
五段论，晕，我实在写不出来了，你觉得还可以写什么？字数的确不够，不到500，晕

ZZZ@MARYLANDUID: 157802

addmittedly由让步的意思啊？真的不知道呢！谢谢你的提醒：）
paraphrase一定不能能忘记！呵呵
的确应该提前，我觉得文章的结构最好简单，一开头就提出你明确的观点，
硬币的比喻的确是不好，嘿嘿，其实我也找不出什么好的比喻，只是觉得处唇齿相依的关系不太适合本文，也许是由于我对我国文学的理解太浅薄了吧，呵呵
还可以写什么啊，呵呵，我在我的作文里写了会产生作者这样看法的原因，虽说不是很必要的一段，但是我认为作为凑字数还是有用的，嘿嘿