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[优秀习作] Issue169 新种的椰树,政治和道德 [复制链接]

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发表于 2004-4-8 03:55:10 |显示全部楼层
Those who treat politics and morality as though they were separate realms fail to understand either the one or the other.

提纲:
1.        同意。政治和道德虽然有不同点,但实际上并不能被孤立开来,而是相互关联的。
2.        政治和道德的概念解释,其在概念上的不同点
3.        政治利用道德作为其统治手段
4.        道德一定程度随政治变化,但也具有相对的独立性
5.        总结

It is justified that those who regard politics and morality as two separate realms do not understand either of them. I do agree with this point.  Politics and morality, though some differences could be found between them, actually are somewhat not isolated from but relative to each other.


Primarily, to understand their relationship quite needs an exact scrutiny about their definitions and realms they concerned about respectively.  Politics, which is a kind of science of government manners, mainly care for the relationships among people and groups in the societies, not only established by one single country but also by nations.  It also envelops all affairs of governing and diplomacy. On the other hand, morality is much more a metaphysical concept than politics. It is consisted of a gather of doctrines, which are formed norms to tell goodness from evil.  Morality functions as conduction to people's action and politics works to offer a living circumstance for them.

However, such difference in their interpretations of concepts is nothing but a skin-deep idea. Politics do need the assistance of morality to reach its purpose to attain most profits as possible for the governing hierarchy.  Since morality is accepted norms for the mass, politics usually utilize it to keep the stability of society.  By compelling people to take a solid kind of morality sense, which is beneficial for the governing hierarchy, as their action rules, government or politicians could unify its or their people, dwindle the objections from the mass, and establish a long-lasting control of the power. For example, the ideas of Kongzi have been adopted as the basic rules in China. What he advocated, to be committed to one's governor and to love one's homeland, would restrict people not to be insubordinate, for which it has been a potent instrument for the government in controlling people for over 2 thousand of years. On the contrast, those kinds of morality which do not stand for the profit of governors, would inevitably encounter a same fate to be banned or expelled.  A considerable amount of ideas were named heresies for this reason, whether they are or are not reasonable. In the case of Tibet before the establishment of People's Republic of China, when it was still in slave society, the morality of equality of human beings was laughed at and opposed to by the slave owners there. In brief, where there is politics, where there is morality.

In addition, morality can also be influenced by politics but sometimes it can live against politics. First, morality is not invariable and it surely changes along with the change of society, especially at the same rate of politics. For example, when England is still in feudal society, morality sense in people's mind would treat devoice as immoral. Oppositely, it is commonly accepted today and even to be considered a sign of feminine liberation. That is because of the advance of politics from feudalism to democracy, making more moral standards opening. However, when the flagrant regime Taliban was ever in charge of Afghanistan, democratic morality had to suffer from a big backslide, for example, that females would never be admitted to have educations. Second, morality is not be determined by politics totally but it enjoys some extent of independence. For example, even though Bush’s government of the United States launched the war against Iraq one year ago, and wants to force the mass to agree with it, the morality sense of the US people motivated them to go on to the streets and hold numerous processions against the war. Somehow, morality is concealed in people’s mind and direct them do what they regard correct, no matter how the politics advocates.

In sum, Politics is stringently linked with morality, so is morality with politics. The former usually utilize the latter as a tool to obtain its goals and the latter is sometimes be buttressed or deserved by the former. Their mutual effects cannot be denied and ignored when one takes a study of either. To retreat politics and morality as entirely separated realms might be only based on the ignitions about both of them. (684 words)

1个小时完成的梦想彻底破灭。这篇和小渔女的角度有些不一样。大家看看吧!没有仔细检查词句,太困了。

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发表于 2004-4-8 08:20:14 |显示全部楼层
03:55AM  ??

needle,你要注意身体啊!
一步步向目标前进中!

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发表于 2004-4-8 08:53:32 |显示全部楼层
For example, the ideas of Kongzi(confucious) have been adopted as the basic rules in China.

论述很多,但是觉得头绪杂乱,条理不很清晰,象偶这样的菜鸟有点dyslexia
愚以为,
结构应该尽可能清晰,首句提领整段,是至理名言。

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发表于 2004-4-8 10:00:56 |显示全部楼层

在我看来是个BT的题目

Those who treat politics and morality as though they were separate realms fail to understand either the one or the other.
就提纲来看,没有提到题目后半句的内容
只是在讲道德和政治的联系~~~那么是不是区别对待就是都不懂呢?其实提纲稍微改一下就不错了,两者相互依存渗透,是不能孤立的,一个人只看到一半,并不能看清其中的任何一个,感觉来个这样的body3就行

提纲:
1. 同意。政治和道德虽然有不同点,但实际上并不能被孤立开来,而是相互关联的。
2. 政治和道德的概念解释,其在概念上的不同点
3. 政治利用道德作为其统治手段
4. 道德一定程度随政治变化,但也具有相对的独立性
5. 总结

It is justified that those who regard politics and morality as two separate realms do not understand either of them. I do agree with this point. Politics and morality, though some differences could be found between them, actually are somewhat not isolated from but relative to each other.句子真是好!


Primarily看到这个词儿拉, to understand their relationship quite needs an exact scrutiny about their definitions and realms they concerned about respectively打外围的写法. Politics, which is a kind of science of government manners, mainly care for the relationships among people and groups in the societies, not only established by one single country but also by nations. It also envelops all affairs of governing and diplomacy. On the other hand, morality is much more a metaphysical这个词儿不好,有形而上的歧义 concept than politics. It is consisted of a gather of doctrines, which are formed norms to tell goodness from evil. Morality functions as conduction to people's action and politics works to offer a living circumstance for them.强!!打外围,真厉害~~我是万万写不出来的。看到下一段提到了such differences,这里最好也能提到一下,以便衔接

However, such difference in their interpretations of concepts is nothing but a skin-deep idea. Politics do need the assistance of morality to reach its purpose to attain most profits as possible for the governing hierarchy. Since morality is accepted norms for the mass, politics usually utilize it to keep the stability of society. By compelling people to take a solid kind of morality sense, which is beneficial for the governing hierarchy, as their action rules, government or politicians could unify its or their people, dwindle the objections from the mass, and establish a long-lasting control of the power. For example, the ideas of KongziConfucius have been adopted as the basic rules in China. What he advocated, to be committed to one's governor and to love one's homeland, would restrict people not to be insubordinate, for which it has been a potent instrument for the government in controlling people for over 2 thousand of years. On the contrast, those kinds of morality which do not stand for the profit of governors, would inevitably encounter a same fate to be banned or expelled. A considerable amount of ideas were named heresies for this reason, whether they are or are not reasonable说得好!. In the case of Tibet before the establishment of People's Republic of China, when it was still in slave societyslavery, the morality of equality of human beings was laughed at and opposed to by the slave owners there. In brief, where there is politics, where there is morality. God 最后这句话忒强了!嗯 姐姐进步的利害,这段写得很不错 关系写得很好

In addition, morality can alsoalso? be influenced by politics but sometimes it can live against politics. First, morality is not invariable and it surely changes along with the change of society, especially at the same rate of politics. For example, when England is still in feudal society, morality sense in people's mind would treat devoice as immoralGod 这都知道!不过没看懂 :eek: . Oppositely, it is commonly accepted today and even to be considered a sign of feminine liberation. That is because of the advance of politics from feudalism to democracy, making more moral standards opening. However, when the flagrant regime Taliban was ever in charge of Afghanistan, democratic morality had to suffer from a big backslide, for example, that females would never be admitted to have educations. Second, morality is not be determined by politics totally but it enjoys some extent of independence. For example, even though Bush’s government of the United States launched the war against Iraq one year ago, and wants时态 to force the mass to agree with it, the morality sense of the US people motivated them to go on to the streets and hold numerous processions against the war. Somehow, morality is concealed in people’s mind and direct them do what they regard correct, no matter how the politics advocates.道德反作用于政治,随政治改变。这段应该是两个意群~所以会引起混乱的感觉~~而且写到后面,越发觉得离题目远了一些 毕竟是没说到究竟那个人是懂不懂这两个概念呢~~没说~~~

In sum, Politics is stringently linked with morality, so is morality with politics. The former usually utilize the latter as a tool to obtain its goals and the latter is sometimes be buttressed or deserved by the former. Their mutual effects cannot be denied and ignored when one takes a study of either. To retreat politics and morality as entirely separated realms might be only based on the ignitions about both of them.结尾又出来了,论证过程却一直含蓄的不肯说出来~~中国人的写法撒 (684 words)

1个小时完成的梦想彻底破灭。这篇和小渔女的角度有些不一样。大家看看吧!没有仔细检查词句,太困了。

越写越好啊~~~5555 我是越写越滥`~
姐姐加油~~写的还是很不错的!
打外围很成功阿 :cool:
别再搜我帖子了

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发表于 2004-4-8 10:21:24 |显示全部楼层
在我看来是个BT的题目--严重同意!
一步步向目标前进中!

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发表于 2004-4-8 10:26:56 |显示全部楼层

To fishergirl

你的第六条偶不同意~~~在很多sample 6都见过~~~ 比如阿狗的claria(是这么写吧?)6 的~~一个body全是问句

另外第二条的标准是什么?什么算多?
别再搜我帖子了

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发表于 2004-4-8 12:26:19 |显示全部楼层
学习学习先
take your place in the great circle of life

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发表于 2004-4-8 12:26:36 |显示全部楼层
最初由 saltsberry 发布
[B]For example, the ideas of Kongzi(confucious) have been adopted as the basic rules in China.

论述很多,但是觉得头绪杂乱,条理不很清晰,象偶这样的菜鸟有点dyslexia
愚以为,
结构应该尽可能清晰,首句提领整段,是至理名言。[/B]


可能想的太复杂了?写的时候又没有控制好。。。anyway,谢谢盐浆果的点评!会说dyslexia还算菜鸟?太谦虚了,我都是点着巴比伦翻译了才知道这是什么意思的。。。//shy

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发表于 2004-4-8 12:40:56 |显示全部楼层

Re: 在我看来是个BT的题目

最初由 lovebrian 发布
[B]就提纲来看,没有提到题目后半句的内容
只是在讲道德和政治的联系~~~那么是不是区别对待就是都不懂呢?其实提纲稍微改一下就不错了,两者相互依存渗透,是不能孤立的,一个人只看到一半,并不能看清其中的任何一个,感觉来个这样的body3就行
B]

我想的是说清楚二者有联系。对题目我的理解是,其潜在的论点其实在于二者孤立,而不是真的要论证这个人这样说就两样都不懂。也许这样审题偏颇了?

最初由 lovebrian 发布
[B]Primarily看到这个词儿拉, to understand their relationship quite needs an exact scrutiny about their definitions and realms they concerned about respectively打外围的写法. Politics, which is a kind of science of government manners, mainly care for the relationships among people and groups in the societies, not only established by one single country but also by nations. It also envelops all affairs of governing and diplomacy. On the other hand, morality is much more a metaphysical这个词儿不好,有形而上的歧义 concept than politics. It is consisted of a gather of doctrines, which are formed norms to tell goodness from evil. Morality functions as conduction to people's action and politics works to offer a living circumstance for them.强!!打外围,真厉害~~我是万万写不出来的。看到下一段提到了such differences,这里最好也能提到一下,以便衔接[B]


Primarily,西西,和你说过的,你也可以试试看,肯定比first, first of all, in the first place, firstly要好。

打外围?我写的时候一点也没想着这个。。上黄予的课他是说过的,我怎么一点也没记住。

metaphysical的确不准确,应该用ideological,意识形态的

最初由 lovebrian 发布
[B]In addition, morality can alsoalso? be influenced by politics but sometimes it can live against politics. First, morality is not invariable and it surely changes along with the change of society, especially at the same rate of politics. For example, when England is still in feudal society, morality sense in people's mind would treat devoice as immoralGod 这都知道!不过没看懂  . [B]


晕!就是说在封建社会的英国,离婚被人们的道德观念视作不道德的。英国是我随便说的,反正哪儿哪儿都一样的。西西。

最初由 lovebrian 发布
[B]道德反作用于政治,随政治改变。这段应该是两个意群~所以会引起混乱的感觉~~而且写到后面,越发觉得离题目远了一些 毕竟是没说到究竟那个人是懂不懂这两个概念呢~~没说~~~
[B]


这一段写的不是道德反作用于政治,而是政治对道德的影响以及道德的相对独立性。的确是两个意群,TS里面就表明了的,应该不算结构过于混乱吧?的确没有说到命题中这个人懂不懂这两样.....可能跟我上面说的审题角度有关系。

最初由 lovebrian 发布
[B]结尾又出来了,论证过程却一直含蓄的不肯说出来~~中国人的写法撒 (684 words)


越写越好啊~~~5555 我是越写越滥`~
姐姐加油~~写的还是很不错的!
打外围很成功阿  [B]


:PP结尾是为了呼应开头,总结全文,所以写了。是不是有点突兀。//sigh....努力进步

谢谢狒狒赞的这么厉害,我都有点晕。

这一篇我想的很多,但是把思想组织到这么短的一篇文章里是很不容易的,做了很多比较和取舍。例子方面,也挺郁闷的,太多的词不会写,本来想举文革的例子(这是非常好的道德受政治影响的例子),但是例子全是中国的也不好。又想举柬埔寨红色高棉的例子,但是词太难记住了,就算我现在查了,也不可能背下来写到考场上。看起来塔利班和阿富汗比较容易记住,所以写了这个。

继续努力种植椰树,再次谢谢狒狒鼓励以及大家的指点!

TO小渔女,那阵子的确很累,不过没写完就觉得难受,就撑着了。谢谢关心!!!

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Capricorn摩羯座 荣誉版主

发表于 2004-4-8 12:47:27 |显示全部楼层
语言上没得说了
偶觉得body1和body2写得很不错,很透彻了
body3把两个意群混在一起了
道德一定程度随政治变化,这个还是两者的联系
但也具有相对的独立性,这个就是两者的。。。反正不算联系把
是不是把这两个意群独立成段更好一点?
Life is full of drama.

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发表于 2004-4-8 12:53:47 |显示全部楼层
最初由 apolloxp 发布
[B]语言上没得说了
偶觉得body1和body2写得很不错,很透彻了
body3把两个意群混在一起了
道德一定程度随政治变化,这个还是两者的联系
但也具有相对的独立性,这个就是两者的。。。反正不算联系把
是不是把这两个意群独立成段更好一点?[/B]


真是一语惊醒梦中人啊!!!

有道理,我是写这两者的联系呢,而不是单纯的写两者的关系,怎么最后写道德的独立性了。

我想Body3仍然应该放在一个段落,但是调整顺序,先写道德的独立性(略写),然后做让步,提出它更主要的还是随政治的变化而变化。怎么样?把重点还是放在联系上!

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Capricorn摩羯座 荣誉版主

发表于 2004-4-8 13:01:04 |显示全部楼层
最初由 needle 发布
我想Body3仍然应该放在一个段落,但是调整顺序,先写道德的独立性(略写),然后做让步,提出它更主要的还是随政治的变化而变化。怎么样?把重点还是放在联系上!

我也觉得这样比较好
稍微该下都可以当范文了 :)
Life is full of drama.

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发表于 2004-4-8 13:16:40 |显示全部楼层

厉害

强!!打外围,真厉害~~我是万万写不出来的---------同意

1.下定义的写法难度太大 不好用
2.感觉好象有点乱,意群太多
take your place in the great circle of life

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发表于 2004-4-8 13:22:11 |显示全部楼层
Body3改过了结构和一些语法、词汇错误,删减添加了一些句子,大家看看对于加强论证有没有帮助。非常非常感谢apolloxp的启发!


In addition, although morality has some extent independence, usually, it can be and has been influenced by politics deeply. First, morality sometimes could exist against politics. For example, even though Bush’s government of the United States launched the war against Iraq one year ago, and wants to force the mass to agree with it, the morality sense of the US people motivated them to go onto the streets and hold numerous processions against the war. But second, when the fact is taken into account that morality is not invariable and it surely changes along with the change of society, especially at the same rate of politics, morality would not be regard as an insular social concept. For instance, when England was still in feudal society, morality sense in people's mind would make them treat devoice as immoral. Oppositely, it is commonly accepted today and even to be considered a sign of feminine liberation. That is because of the advance of politics from feudalism to democracy, making more moral standards open. However, when the flagrant regime Taliban was ever in charge of Afghanistan, democratic morality had to suffer from a big backslide, under which females would never be admitted to have educations there in that they treat it as out of chastity.Somehow, morality is closely based on the situation of a society and then could not be apart from politics.

不过还是没有提到狒狒建议的要联系对于“那个人”的判断。那个需要整体改才行了。

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发表于 2004-4-8 13:23:03 |显示全部楼层
谢谢jackyeah批阅!

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RE: Issue169 新种的椰树,政治和道德 [修改]

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