第一次写argument～求重喷！求建议！

一个人瑶啊瑶UID: 3664584

The following appeared as a letter to the editor of a national newspaper. 
"Your recent article on corporate downsizing* in Elthyria maintains that the majority of competent workers who have lost jobs as a result of downsizing face serious economic hardship, often for years, before finding other suitable employment. But this claim is undermined by a recent report on the Elthyrian economy, which found that since 1999 far more jobs have been created than have been eliminated, bringing the unemployment rate in Elthyria to its lowest level in decades. Moreover, two-thirds of these newly created jobs have been in industries that tend to pay above-average wages, and the vast majority of these jobs are full-time."

*Downsizing is the process whereby corporations deliberately make themselves smaller, reducing the number of their employees. 

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument. 

    In the letter to the editor of a national newspaper, the author claims that the report on the Elthyrian economy is contract to the viewpoint of the article in the national newspaper since the newspaper shows that the majorities reason of the worker lost jobs because of downsizing when the corporate facing serious economic hardship while the report shows more and more jobs have been created since 1999. Also, the report shows that most of the newly created jobs provides above-average wages and offer full-time job.

    However, two ideas do not contract to each other. The downsizing of corporate and the expansion of  the newly job are individual. Maybe they are both exist at same time. Because the way of downsizing when the corporate facing economic hardship is a common way. Since they could not afford large number of job opportunity any more. The newly created job maybe specific in different field from the downsizing corporate. That maybe the reason why it takes years for worker to find another suitable employment. They have to learn different skill to meet the requirement of the newly created job.

    Moreover, maybe two affair happened in order. That the downsizing happened before 1999. Then newly created job bring the job opportunity to the worker who lost job. So, the workers who lost job kept seeking jobs until 1999. There is no evidence to show any contradiction between those two affairs.

    Also, the wages and the working time of newly created job cannot provide the old corporate is not good. No exact data tell us the wage and working time of the old corporate. May be the old corporate faces economic hardship because of paying high wages. So, we cannot compare them simply. Thus two viewpoints are not contradict in this aspect.

    To sum up, the economic state of workers can be determined by many aspects. The downsizing of the corporate which is facing serious economic hardship and the newly created jobs does not contract to each other in logic. At least, the letter does not give detailed information to show the contradiction.

♂0℃男孩UID: 2621086

看了，

不知道楼主要求几分……我要个3分就可以了，3.5最好，如果只是这样，还在30min内写完，应该已经ok了吧。一共348个词，是不是需要上400？

不过，第一句略长啊，也有点小错误，什么“Maybe they are both exist at same time.”之类的

加油