issue128

tianxingUID: 154299

128.It is often asserted that the purpose of education is to free the mind and the spirit. In reality, however, formal education tends to restrain our minds and spirits rather than set them free.


Nowadays, the majority of people consider education as the necessary route towards success.  From primary school, middle school to college, the entire of educational system is just like a continuously working machine, producing various colors of products and freighting them to every corner of the world each year.  Will the so-called "formal education" be able to free the minds and spirits of all the students, furthermore, make them succeed in their life?  Absolutely not!

Just like democracy and law, education is also handed down through generations and progressed constantly.  The characteristic of education during certain period is determined by the background belonged to that era, so it is inevitable that education has its historical limitations.  Both the tragedies of Bruno and Copernicus, who were both executed, were due to the contradiction of their minds and the education of middle age in Europe.  However, as time flying, it has been testified that those executioner who alleged that they kept the truth, were also killed by formal education of that epoch.  Formal education always destroys the great thought of the geniuses, meanwhile, bury the soul of the faithful students following it.  Although, today, people can gain almost all kinds of information much more than anytime before through education, who can swear that all these knowledge are impeccable and those whose views are different from the ones respected as classic theories are mad and completely incorrect?  Maybe, for the same reason, someone who is a real gift with free mind and spirit would be restrained by undeveloped education.

Fortunately, more and more educators have recognized that the historical limitations of education, they have tried their best avoiding recurring the tragedies.  Anyway, besides the historical factors, different sorts of cultural traditions, living habits and political influences are also sealed boxes keeping the minds from flying.  As we know, in most East Asian countries, educators used to inculcate mechanically, sometimes the knowledge they taught are too professional and profound for the students to understand, the students always have little time and rare opportunity to provide their own opinions; in North America, educators prefer encouraging the students to develop their imagination, but the students may notice that their knowledge is limited when they intend to solve an issue they are interested in; in Arabian countries, the education is based on their religion, as a result, the students also cannot open their minds freely.  With all these situations mentioned above, we can hardly say that education can free the minds and the spirits completely, to some extent, education acts a role as a mind-keeper.

However, it should be admitted that formal education, undoubtedly, is still the most effective methods to spread the culture in this age.  We cannot imagine what will the world be if all the parents stay at home, rather than go working, and teach their children day and night.  In that case, the children will not absorb the knowledge and thinking mode in all the fields, for their parents are not and cannot be omniscient; moreover, the whole world will decay in a couple of decades.  On the other hand, people may think that education via internet is an ideal way, but it will face other problems such as the development and popularity of information technology, as well as self-control of all the students.  So we should not abandon formal education because it cannot be substituted so far.

In sum, education is not capable of freeing the minds and spirits as people wish, it is only one of the approaches of supplying knowledge and information for the mass, during the process, the classic theories may cumber the minds.  Only through the college of daily life, by observing, thinking, expecting, exploring and summarizing, can we emancipate our hearts and souls.

guoyun01UID: 33199

Nowadays, the majority of people consider education as the necessary route towards success. From primary school, middle school to college, the entire of educational system is just like a continuously working machine, producing various colors of products and freighting them to every corner of the world each year. Will the so-called "formal education" be able to free the minds and spirits of all the students, furthermore, make them succeed in their life? Absolutely not![B]摆明观点。[/B]

Just like democracy and law, education is also handed down through generations and progressed constantly. The characteristic of education during certain period is determined by the background belonged to that era, so it is inevitable that education has its historical limitations.[B]说明教育由于时间和历史的原因而存在的限制性。[/B]  Both the tragedies of Bruno and Copernicus, who were both executed, were due to the contradiction of their minds and the education of middle age in Europe. However, as time flying, it has been testified that those executioner who alleged that they kept the truth, were also killed by formal education of that epoch. [B]好例子！但，这个例子好像放在这里不是最合适的，据我所知，他们应该是被宗教势力所迫害致死。放到第二段里比较好。这里可以用地球到底是圆的还是方的那个例子，或者强调地心说还是日心说正确，而不要强调他们的死的原因。：）[/B] Formal education always destroys the great thought of the geniuses, meanwhile, bury the soul of the faithful students following it. Although, today, people can gain almost all kinds of information much more than anytime before through education[B]。[/B] Who can [U]swear [/U]  s[B]ay 或者assert 就可以了。[/B] that all these knowledges are impeccable and those [U]whose [/U] [B]可以去掉 [/B]  views are different from the ones respected as classic theories are mad and completely incorrect? Maybe, for the same reason, someone who is a real gift with free mind and spirit would be restrained by undeveloped education.

Fortunately, more and more educators have recognized that the historical limitations of education, they have tried their best avoiding recurring the tragedies. Anyway, besides the historical factors, different sorts of cultural traditions, living habits and political influences are also sealed boxes keeping the minds from flying. As we know, in most East Asian countries, educators used to inculcate mechanically, sometimes the knowledge they taught are too professional and profound for the students to understand, the students always have little time and [U]rare[/U] [B]去掉  [/B]  opportunity to provide their own opinions; [U]in North America, educators prefer encouraging the students to develop their imagination, but the students may notice that their knowledge is limited when they intend to solve an issue they are interested in[/U] ; [B]这个例子不是很恰当，其实美国孩子的一些缺点是被夸大了的。他们是有足够的知识来做他们要做的事情的。最好不要加入一些不确定的例子，不然会起到反作用[/B] in Arabian countries, the education is based on their religion, as a result, the students also cannot open their minds freely. With all these situations mentioned above, we can hardly say that education can free the minds and the spirits completely, to some extent, education acts a role as a mind-keeper.

However, it should be admitted that formal education, undoubtedly, is still the [B]one of the[/B]  most effective methods to spread the culture in this age. We cannot imagine what will the world be if all the parents stay at home, rather than go working, and teach their children day and night. In that case, the children will not absorb the knowledge and thinking mode in all the fields, for their parents are not and cannot be omniscient; moreover, the whole world will decay in a couple of decades . On the other hand, people may think that education via internet is an ideal way, but it will face other problems such as the development and popularity of information technology, as well as self-control of all the students. So we should not abandon formal education because it cannot be substituted so far.这边观点很好，退一步说formal education也不是一无是处的。但是例子不是从正面来支持分论点的。似乎思维还是停留在前面。要有正面说formal education effective就好了。

In sum, education is not capable of freeing the minds and spirits as people wish, it is only one of the approaches of supplying knowledge and information for the mass, during the process, the classic theories may cumber the minds. Only through the college of daily life, by observing, thinking, expecting, exploring and summarizing, can we emancipate our hearts and souls.

总之，写得很好了。结构清晰。长度足够。羡慕~~~~

tianxingUID: 154299

非常感谢 guoyun01 的批评指正！
bow//

yundongtuUID: 164437

个人认为，这是一篇很优秀的习作，从语言到结构，都不失为一篇范文。
谢谢搂主和我们一起分享这篇文章，继续上传阿，共同学习

tianxingUID: 154299

谢谢你的鼓励！ :)