issue同主题写作第五类 8月20-21日

sweepyouUID: 3559530

69:
Some people believe it is often necessary, even desirable, for political leaders to withhold information from the public. Others believe that the public has a right to be fully informed.

Write a response in which you discuss which view more closely aligns with your own position and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should address both of the views presented.

用了第三种框架（应该是），分别讨论了普通民众和精英（专业人士）获得信息的必要性，第三段为让步段（参考了老师的），认为和国土安全相关的机密信息应当被保密一段时间。
TS: In order for effective political participation for the public, both the common citizens and elites, information should be accessible by all the stakeholders in most cases. Admittedly, some classified information could be withheld for a certain time.

ts1:
For every common citizen, full access to information is the prerequisite to well-performed political participation.

-Unlike ancient Greek or Rome,  most modern democratic countries adopt the framework of representative democracy. In this circumstance, citizens not fully informed are inclined to be led blindly by those in power.
e.g. During the president election, if not fully informed about the candidates, voters tend to make their judgement based on propaganda and slogans, but not the politician's real capability.   

-Especially, in authoritarian countries, the governors  and elites tend to withhold information for their own interest; Therefore, in order to participate in political issues, the citizens need to strive for the right get access to information.
e.g. During environmental impact assessment, without pertinent information, citizens are not able to protect their quality of life.

ts2:
For elites, such as scholars and professionals, being well-informed is beneficial for their decision-making in certain areas.

-Unlike professionals, like scholars, doctors or attorneys, political leaders don't have the say in certain fields. It's necessary for professionals to get access to certain information

ts3:
Admittedly, for some information concerning security, it should not be accessible to all the common people, but only to a few political leaders and certain specialists. Nevertheless, after a certain period it still needs to be declassified.
e.g. The U.S. government's hunt for Bin Laden

Cohesion分析：是在The New York Times看到的一篇，I voted for Trump and I sorely regret it
https://www.nytimes.com/2017/08/17/opinion/sunday/i-voted-for-trump-and-i-sorely-regret-it.html

Yet after more than 200 days in office, Mr. Trump’s behavior grows only more reprehensible. Meanwhile, his administration has no significant legislative accomplishments — and no apparent plan to deliver any. Wilbur Ross’s Commerce Department has advanced some sensible and appropriately incremental changes to trade policy, but no long-term agenda has been articulated. Senators Tom Cotton and David Perdue’s recently proposed legislation offers a sound basis for reforming immigration policy, but seems to have no prospects and has received comparatively little attention. The administration inexplicably downgraded infrastructure and corporate tax reform — issues with potentially broad-based support — to pursue a warmed-over version of Paul Ryan’s Obamacare repeal, which ended, predictably, in a humiliating failure.
整段都是在说施政过程中“预想的”事情和实际发生的事，通过时间对比体现连贯性。

点评22L：
你选择的例子正好是我一开始想到的，比如earthquake但我觉得难以论证就放弃了。而你用的驳论法很有说服力，也是难度很大的一种写法。
开头段：开头段稍微有点模板化，可以适当简略省出时间来写干货，或者在首段引入一些之后可能出现的概念解释。

之后ts2,3为什么开头都是on the other hand?

另外，根据回应关键字的原则，每段ts最好都带上关键字诸如well informed，对于新出现的关键字，比如education, freedom of speeh, 需要指出和题目关键字之间的关系。

1,2段整体的感觉就是例子和论证比较有说服力，但和题目的关系不够紧凑，最终没有说明到底要不要信息公开；ts3的长句需要再整理一下，有点不够简明。

justiceklUID: 3803056

model essay:
To begin with, I strongly believe that government officials should consult the public frequently and systematically before introducing important policies.  For one thing, the government officials should always take into account the people’s opinions when developing relevant policies in order to better meet the needs of the people.  For example, before the Hong Kong government decides to tighten the ban on smoking in public space, it has run a public consultation for over 3 months to collect people’s opinions on this issue.  A better understanding of what people think about the issue can inform the policy-making process.  In addition, hearing people’s voices on the proposed policy will further legitimize the policy and make it easy for the government to later enforce the policy.  The ban of smoking, for example, would be much easier if the society has reached a consensus about the issue.  

issue 50: Government officials should rely on their own judgment rather than unquestioningly carry out the will of the people they serve.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.

Government officials should rely on their own judgment rather than unquestioningly carry out the will of the people they serve.

Government is a big organization to help the civilian to achieve the common goal and better life. Thus, it’s  not doubt that the government should hear some the ideas from their people and try to help them to live better lives. However, this is not to mean that government should listen to the all ideas from people and follow them without other judgement.In my opinion, while consider about some of the people’s thought ,the government should make the final decision by itself because the government is always the specialized authority. What’s more? The people themselves have deverse ideas and can not achieve a consensus and their ideas may be too arbitary and short-sighted.

TS1:Government is always the specialized authority.
Reason: Government consisted of almost the most talented people in politics around the country,so the specialized knowledge forms the foundation for them to make a right decision while the people ideas are from different people with different level and quality.
People choose a pack of elite to form a government as an organization because they trust them and their knowledge.Making decision is what government should do and is what people espect them to do.
TS2: Second, people from different background seem impossible to make the same decision because everyone is selfish and wants to gain the most profit for their own.
Ex:For example,considering about the problem of restrict the use of the cars, some people don’t think it’s necessary because cars provide them with a lot of convenience and comfort for their commute everyday. However, some people feel disgusted about too many cars sticking on the road without a move in a long time.You can’t achieve a consesum by the diverse ideas
This is to say, to carry out the people’s will is not a practical implement in modern society.
TS3: I don’t mean that we should not take into acount the diverse ideas from different kinds of people.As a genuine government , it should consider about all kinds of people from different class and make a final decision that satisfy all people . This is a hard problem for all the officers, the elite who form the government. Some politics and regulation should be introduced to make should they can hear the voice from the people and hear the people’s ideas without abusing their prevelige. And the government should be monitored by other institution such as the Procuratorate,media and so on.In this way, the government can achieve a great success and thus our people’s lives.

In conclusion, we should rely on the judegments from the government because they are more specialized and the ideas from people are too diverse and unsophisticated. However, before making its decision, government should consider thoroughly the all kinds of ideas from people through some approach such as vote. Only in this way, the government can fulfill/do its duty and truly helps with its people.

flhopeUID: 3823681

50) Government officials should rely on their own judgment rather than unquestioningly carry out the will of the people they serve.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.


开头段：
The Government responsible for maintaining the development and harmony of society is required to make decisions and focus policies mainly on three aspects—namely foreign affairs, resources distribution and livelihood issues. Given the fact that people do not have a comprehensive and profound understanding about the first two cases and sometimes they cannot reach a consensus even on livelihood issues which they are closely associated with, I agree that government officials should make a final decision based on their own judgment instead of blindly follow the will of the public who are likely to lack long-term vision.

Ts1
Foreign affairs are inevitable for a country to face, which is so crucial that the Government need to depend on their own judgement with long-term vison rather than refer to the people unquestioningly.
e.g. sovereignty issues; international affairs such as economic cooperation and cultural interaction
Ts2
In addition to the politic issue, resources distribution is likewise of paramount importance and it is well-qualified officials of the government but the public who can consider it holistically.
e.g. funding distribution for researches; educational resources distribution; natural resources allocation
Ts3
While decision-makers are obliged to consider properly the voice of the public who are directly associated with livelihood issues, they should still take it as reference and rely on their own judgement to make a sagacious decision instead of blindly adopting people’s diverse and inconsistent advice.
e.g. rich people want more private clinics regardless of cost, while indigent ones desire public hospital and well-covered health insurance; similar conflict between public & private school; house issues

遠子wUID: 3788646

In any profession—business, politics, education, government—those in power should step down after five years.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.

It is always argued that importing new blood into the top management level is essential to ensure the prosperity of any enterprise in any field. And one way to do it is to limit the term of office of those leaders in power to ensure leadership replacement. The stipulated terms should run off in few years, for example, five years. While I agree that revitalization in the top management level might be important to an enterprise, we should also take potential costs and risks into consideration. In business and educational field, stability and experience are more important than revitalization; so I do not think that the term of office in these fields should be limited to few years. However, in the political field, the term of office indeed should be restricted not only to revitalize the enterprise but also to prevent power abuse and corruption.

TS1
In the business and educational field, stability within the management level is a great consideration. In the business world, leaders usually serve for copious amount of time, sometimes their whole life. Change of leadership in top management level may imply a change in the direction of business strategy and focus. Without severe problems in top management level, constant alteration in the leadership is usually not necessary. New leadership may bring significant risk to the company, for example, severe loss due to leaders’ inexperience or strategic incoherence.  Therefore, frequent changes in the leadership may bring instability and additional risk to the company. Moreover, in the educational field, the experience is an influential factor that affects leadership.  Any recreation within the educational system should be based on empirical experiences of those in power. For example, department heads usually discover problems within the department and adjust the course structure based on their long-term observation.  Therefore, revitalization within education is not based on constant change of leadership but observation and experience.

TS2
The situation in the political field, however, is different from that in business and educational field. In many developed countries such as the United States, presidents or senators should step down after four years in service to ensure democracy and prevent power abuse. Reelections are held every four years. We often observe constant changes in the leadership of political field. In the real world, limited term in office is stipulated not only due to the need for adjusting national policies but more importantly due to the fear of power abuse and corruption. Power abuse and corruption can bring significant consequences such as misuse of the resources of the whole society, drain of government fund, and social inequality. The amount and scale of misuse can be considerable since government controls nationally wide resources.   Therefore, taking account of the significant cost, shortening the term of office of those in power is an indispensable step to control their power.

TS3
One may argue that political leaders also need to build their experience and reputation. Indeed, to serve in the government, one needs political experience in order to succeed. However, in the political field, one’s career is more flexible and dynamic, and job usually is short-term in nature. Political professions can serve as different positions in the field to culminate their experience and gain their reputations. In a word, they can better build their experience by exploring different positions in the political field, rather than serving a long-term position.

In conclusion, when considering the ideal term of office of those in power, we need to study the situations in different fields. In business or educational field, those in power should serve in long-term due to risk consideration. And stockholders or an independent educational committee can supervise their use of power. However, in the political field, it is necessary to restrict the term of service of powerful individuals and control their power.

分析coherence：
Consider the leadership in business world first. With the separation of ownership and management in modern corporations, it is important for the stockholders to trust the managers of the businesses.  But to earn the trust of the stockholders often takes a relatively long period of time. The managers will need to demonstrate their competence as leaders through years of services and accumulate more experience while working with the staff to develop the best strategic plans for the long-term development of a company.  Once the manager reaches the top management, s/he will become a valuable asset that the company cannot afford to lose. If s/he has to leave the position in five years, the company will have to start over the process of cultivating a leader all over again.  Therefore, to save money for the investors of the company, this rule should not apply.  

RazorLXUID: 3543691

Coherence Analysis
issue 50: Government officials should rely on their own judgment rather than unquestioningly carry out the will of the people they serve.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.


In a democratic society, government officials are often held responsible for their decisions related to their office duty.  If they failed to perform their duties and satisfy their constituencies, they may lose the next election.  Therefore, some people believe that government officials should make their decisions according to the will of the people instead of making their own judgements over different issues.  In my opinion, government officials should always consult the public opinions when formulating important policies.  Nevertheless, it is not reasonable to carry people’s will unquestioningly because over important issues people are often divided and poorly informed.  Therefore, government officials should do their jobs by taking into account various factors and let the people decide if they did a satisfactory job overall in the next election.

gre满分周UID: 3828848

To begin with, I strongly believe that government officials should consult the public frequently and systematically before introducing important policies. For one thing, the government officials should always take into account the people’s opinions when developing relevant policies in order to better meet the needs of the people.  For example, before the Hong Kong government decides to tighten the ban on smoking in public space, it has run a public consultation for over 3 months to collect people’s opinions on this issue.  A better understanding of what people think about the issue can inform the policy-making process.  In addition, hearing people’s voices on the proposed policy will further legitimize the policy and make it easy for the government to later enforce the policy.  The ban of smoking, for example, would be much easier if the society has reached a consensus about the issue.  


123)The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.

开头段
After undergoing a marathon journey from primary school to entering the society, we are always be taught to cooperate and compete with others.Meanwhile, there is a dilemma that between cooperation and competition which is more important when the youth is a potential leader. While at first glance it may seem appealing to emphasize building the youngster’s competition ability, I remain doubtful of such a proposal. If we hastily carry out the advice, it would probably jeopardize the stabilization of stripling’s lead.

TS1
Advocates of this claim will reject my position. They argue that competition enable young people reach their peak of career for contending with others will definitely incur the youth’s victory centre. However,  a convinced leader should collaborate people rather than contend with his colleagues.



TS2
Opposition to my argument also comes from through compete with others, the stripling will improve his capabilities in their work for only exceed most of peers can he obtain success in his enterprise. Nevertheless, competing means that nearly all of the time he to fight alone but collaborating will help the youth gain some new technique in a short time.

TS3
Although I maintain that work together with other person is especially significant for a future leader for serving the government which capability is not the most vital key, some people may dispute my position.

Eg. Jared Kushner  not so good at study  how to cooperate

gre满分周UID: 3828848

To begin with, I strongly believe that government officials should consult the public frequently and systematically before introducing important policies.  For one thing, the government officials should always take into account the people’s opinions when developing relevant policies in order to better meet the needs of the people.  For example, before the Hong Kong government decides to tighten the ban on smoking in public space, it has run a public consultation for over 3 months to collect people’s opinions on this issue.  A better understanding of what people think about the issue can inform the policy-making process.  In addition, hearing people’s voices on the proposed policy will further legitimize the policy and make it easy for the government to later enforce the policy.  The ban of smoking, for example, would be much easier if the society has reached a consensus about the issue.  


123)The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.

开头段
After undergoing a marathon journey from primary school to entering the society, we are always be taught to cooperate and compete with others.Meanwhile, there is a dilemma that between cooperation and competition which is more important when the youth is a potential leader. While at first glance it may seem appealing to emphasize building the youngster’s competition ability, I remain doubtful of such a proposal. If we hastily carry out the advice, it would probably jeopardize the stabilization of stripling’s lead.

TS1
Advocates of this claim will reject my position. They argue that competition enable young people reach their peak of career for contending with others will definitely incur the youth’s victory centre. However,  a convinced leader should collaborate people rather than contend with his colleagues.



TS2
Opposition to my argument also comes from through compete with others, the stripling will improve his capabilities in their work for only exceed most of peers can he obtain success in his enterprise. Nevertheless, competing means that nearly all of the time he to fight alone but collaborating will help the youth gain some new technique in a short time.

TS3
Although I maintain that work together with other person is especially significant for a future leader for serving the government which capability is not the most vital key, some people may dispute my position.

Eg. Jared Kushner  not so good at study  how to cooperate

IbelievingUID: 3744774

ISSUE 111

In any profession—business, politics, education, government—those in power should step down after five years.（8,111,149）

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.

提纲：

Intro: Whether or not should those in power in any vocations quit from their position after several years largely depends on what kind of profession is. I strongly agree to the advice that government official step down after being in power for a period of time to prevent power abuse,  while this policy should not be applied on business and education, as it demands a long time for a leading figure to accumulate their experience in the specific field and earn trust and reputation from other persons,especially key people.

中间段1：

Firstly, consider the situation in business world. with the separation of ownership and management in modern corporations, it’s important for the stockholders to trust the managers of the companies. But to earn the trust from stockholder calls for struggling hard to demonstrate their competence as a leader. It will take managers a long time develop the best strategic plan for long-term development of the company, during which they gradually become experienced and skillful. Such a manager is a definitely great treasure that a company cannot afford to lose. If s/he leave the position after just five years, the company will have to start over the process cultivating a leader all over again.\

youzi42UID: 3806028

issue 8/111/149
In any profession—business, politics, education, government—those in power should step down after five years.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.


我写提纲时搭建框架所用的方法是第3种 按照题目给出的profession细化职业

我的提纲如下

开头段全文：
The statement that those in power in any profession, such as the important person in business, politics, education, government, should step down after five years. To some extent, this statement indeed make sense in some fields--business ,education and gorvernment for example-- for by this way, the newcomer who take place of processer, can make the specific field work more well, by infusing more strenghth and reforming. On the contrary, there are some occupacions that should not require too much change, such as the politics, a stable band of menbers would benefits this better. Thus, to judge the statement, we should comprehensive take the applicable professions , such as the master of the school, company or gorvernment, and the less viable occupations, such as the diplomat, or the ambassador.

主题句1
The administrators of education or gorverment are necessary to be changed after five years.For the reason that, the gorverning tasks, once effective methods applied, the administartors can work fairly easy. However, it not a easy task to come up some innovative and viable ideas especially when one is gradually accostomed to the formal ways in dealing issues.
具体例子或细节
very few candicats who used to be the major chairman seldom lucky enough to sustain his term
原因
they are not sufficent to make enough reform to help the government more powerful and less vulnerable

主题句2
A bussinessman is recommend to  retire after his intatement five years ago , since the intense workload may harm his health and the ability to make wise judgement if continuing his work.
具体例子或细节
increaing reports on the young manager of stock
原因
they are under severe stress every day , very few can endure the tensifying work load . Thus, a change every five years whould do good to both the development of stock market and the efficiency of the brokedealer

主题句3
Given the benefits of the five year's step-down, however , there are some occupations which require stableness, such as the diplomat, or the ambassador.
具体例子或细节
diplomat,ambassador.
原因
work abroad,thus need stableness ;more familier with how to solving problems ; the longer they work , the more skilled they would be

关于这个提纲的写作我有以下感想或困惑
现在写开头没有以前那么难了。

分析文章：
Leadership is vital for the success of any enterprises, whether it is in the field of business, education or public administration. It is argued that, in order to prevent power abuse and revitalize the organizations,those in the leadership positions should quit their jobs after a certain number of years. I think this proposal will not benefit businesses and educational institutions as leaders in these fields need many years to build their reputation and earn trust from the stakeholders. Nevertheless, it is important for government officials to serve for a limited number of years only.

Consider the leadership in business world first. With the separation of ownership and management in modern corporations, it is important for the stockholders to trust the managers of the businesses. But to earn the trust of the stockholders often takes a relatively long period of time. The managers will need to demonstrate their competence as leaders through years of services and accumulate more experience while working with the staff to develop the best strategic plans for the long-term development of a company. Once the manager reaches the top management, s/he will become a valuable asset that the company cannot afford to lose. If s/he has to leave the position in five years, the company will have to start over the process of cultivating a leader all over again. Therefore, to save money for the investors of the company, this rule should not apply.

With the increasing corporatization of higher education, the same logic also applied to the leadership of universities. As a president of a university, one has to spend years developing intimate knowledge about the industry of higher education and building his/her network with the key people in the circle. S/he will need to promote the university aggressively at a global scale and raise money for different projects and programs that can help the university to stay competitive. This is a very challenging job and if a university is lucky enough to find someone who can do the job well, it makes little sense to let him/her go in 5 years. This is why the leaders of universities often hold their positions for years.

Nevertheless, the proposed rule should apply to government officials who do need to leave their jobs after certain years. One may argue that just like corporate CEOs and university presidents, it also takes years for a government official to learn to do his/her job well and build his/her reputation. This is true to some extent. But it is important to bear in mind that “government, even in its best form, is a necessary evil” as it takes away certain amount of freedom from the citizens in order to preserve peace and order. As a result, the power of the government officials have to be limited through the institutional arrangement that any officials, no matter how competent or reputable they are, have to step down after a certain number of years. The risk of having a dictator justifies the cost of reducing the tenure of a capable leader.

In conclusion, I believe that the proposed rule should not be applied to the fields of business and higher education. But for the government leaders, they should definitely leave their positions after a certain number of years.

丽丽酱香饼UID: 3764419

长长的冬瓜糖 发表于 2017-8-21 21:13
同学请问你是看的什么素材呢？感觉现在列提纲没思路然后有了一个思路想不到具体可以支撑的例子~谢谢！~

厚谢抬爱~
我积累的也不多，常常无话可说，所以写这个issue的时候我就查了一些相关的资料，读了几篇范文~
百度了美国的政治制度啊，公认的最好的总统呀~感觉长了一些知识(*^▽^*)
读了老师的范文，也对比着阅读了《GRE作文大讲堂》，感觉这书还行，里面有一些素材可以积累一下，思路跟老师不一样，可以互相参考~
才疏学浅 姑妄言之

liwenhao19UID: 3472930

50) Government officials should rely on their own judgment rather than unquestioningly carry out the will of the people they serve.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.
1357
Should government officials take actions based on their own judgment or just act according to people’s will? In my opinions, government officials should use their own judgment to guide their decision-making, for the general public can be divided on important issues. And even if in cases that they have almost uniform opinions about the issue, their opinions can be biased because they are ill informed about the issues, or because they are short-sighted. So instead of just carrying out the people’s will blindly, I suggest that officials should base their decisions on their own judgment.

First off, the general public is divided about important issues. This is especially true when it comes to economic policies like the design of tax system. Some people especially the poor people would prefer a progressive tax system, since they have fewer tax duties under a progressive tax system and government could use this tax income to help them; While those wealthy people do not like the idea of a progressive tax system, since they share the most tax burden under such system. In cases like these, there is just no people’s will to carry out, since people themselves do not agree with each other on the issue, so the government officials can only rely on their own judgment.

In addition, the general public is usually ill informed about important issues than government officials. This is especially true when it comes to science and technology. Due to their ignorance, people are terrified by the potential disaster outcomes once the station used to create nuclear energy explode. However, modern science teaches us that such events are almost impossible to happen if those stations are built and operated properly. Moreover, nuclear energy is actually more clear and cost-effective that traditional way of producing energy, and is believed to have great potentials to save the human being from the destiny of pollution and energy deficiency. It would be a grave mistake if government officials were swayed by those ill- informed voter and force to give up this more advanced way of producing energy.

Finally, the general public can be short-sighted on important social issues. The most vivid case of this is the environmental problems in developing countries. In those countries, in order to earn more money, people cut down forests and build factories that pollute the neighborhood they live. However, although they see the immediate benefit of high income, they are short-sighted to care about the long-term consequences of a polluted environment, which may be a price too high to pay for them. In such cases, the governments cannot rely on the will of people, since they are shorted sighted and biased by the immediate economic benefit, instead the officials should rely on their own judgment, the resist the pressures from the people who complains about unemployment to protect the environment, otherwise the environment will be polluted and everyone will suffer.

In sum, people’s will is not a sound resort for government officials when it comes to policy-making, since the general public is often divided on important issues, and in additions, they may not be able to make good choices as they are ill informed and short sighted. As a result， it makes more sense for those officials to rely on their own judgment when making important decisions.
1450

MargueritexyUID: 3788684

issue 104/107
To be an effective leader, a public official must maintain the highest ethical and moral standards.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
我选择用第二种方式构建框架，从不同角度说明。

I totally agree that a public official leader who wants to be effective needs to maintain the highest ethical and moral standards. People having high moral and ethical standards tend to be more successful and disciplinary because when considering about something, there always are doctrines of humanity and disciplines of working knock them to plan and arrange anything in order and in a justified way. Moreover, sticking to high ethical and moral standards help them in their private life.
TS1：It’s the key that maintaining the highest ethical and moral standards to prevent the public official from corruption, reducing much unnecessary trouble.
e.g. Chief Xi in China takes many measures to beat the corruption and is strict with officials, especially those officials who have strong power. And after his striking on corruption and power using, the whole system of China improves in implements of policy and development of economy.
TS2: Those leader officials with high standards for themselves can set a good example for their subordinates.
e.g. A group is like a tree, the leader is trunk and the workers are branches. Only the leader has a good disciplines to correct and regulate their own leadership, the core strength can be strong and gather the group towards a clear direction to make achievements. Subordinates can learn from their leader as an example so that they can be of unity.
TS3: People always follow the high criterions to work are likely to treat their life strictly and principled.
e.g My mentor is a woman who makes an importance both on efficiency and quality in researches and study. After I know more about her life, I recognize that she is a principle person in everything and she put anything whatever is about work or life in order, which, helps her do anything effectively.

范文连贯性分析
Without being tested by demands for leadership, people often assume leadership positions by demonstrating strong communication skills that are important for dealing with situations in which they have to lead others to solve problems. In the field of academic researches, for example, senior researchers have to communicate their research findings and the vision about how the discipline would advance clearly and persuasively to the fellow researchers in order to take up leadership positions such as editors of top journals and chairpersons of the academic societies. They also need to demonstrate their willingness to listen to other members of the research community and understand their ideas and concerns about the field.  Such strong communication skills would enable them to become leaders in the field and help others to meet the challenges.  

点评46楼

1）提纲的框架是否合理？
合理
2）提纲所用的例子是否合适？
第二个点下边的例子我没有看太懂，我能大概猜到你的意思。但是我觉得可能不是很好地支持论点。
3）开头段语言方面有哪些问题？
没有

xiulin2015UID: 3609356

Angelyyy 发表于 2017-8-20 23:01
03/03/2014
The Embargo of Cuba: Time to Go- Becker
The US embargo of Cuba began in 1960, a year af ...

TS: How to maintain a relatively high effect for leaders is a debatable ( and challenging) issue. Especially for the political leaders, they should consider about how to ensure the overall stability of the society. As far as I am concerned,on the cases related close to the happiness and daily lives of people, effective leaders should are persuaded to listen the advice from the public.When it comes to the executives ( execution) of the law,leaders must be solid and impassive and persist to their principles.
( comments: 我觉得该题目的难点是对 principles and objectives的解释，什么是有效领导者在具体工作中应该坚持的原则和追寻的目标。你用了happinesee and daily lives并且在下文做了诠释，公共设施如何考虑残障人士出行 青少年犯罪将不同经济阶层家庭一视同仁 弱势群体的资源保障和创造教育机会；都点题并呼应了你的主题观点，我觉得将happiness改为wellbeing可能更有概括性；另外好的领导者也是创造和引导一个社会正确价值观的重要人物，他所追寻的principles and objectives可以由此定义。) （ 通过改你的文章，好好思考了一下如何写issue, 收获很大，我们继续结伴努力）
ts1: For the first part,let me explain why I think it is dispensable ( dispensable means not essential or necessary; it should be “ why I think it is essentially important )  for the leaders to make compromises to their people. As for the work really close to the people’s daily lives,leaders should listen to them and make promotions.( As for the leaders’ work keeping abreast with people’s daily life, listening to public opinions and making adjustments are very significant.)  
-For example,public equipment is always being revised and the designers tried their best to provide the convenience for the public.( Effective leaders should be open to public utilities’ adaptation to the public convenice.) I remember once at the subway in Beijin,I saw the introduction of the newest lower-path designed especially for the disabled people,which is constructed after a series of suggestions of the citizens,received compliments mostly. ( For instance, Beijing’s subway is a good example. The installation of the most advanced lower-path decker for the disabled is actually an adoption of public opinions)  However,the design before which are condemned for the most time,built only by the isolated purpose.( However , the facilities used to separate the handicapped people but not enable them to move easily as others. It has been criticized by public for a long time and finally leaders adopt the opinion and adjust the utilizes to accommodate the needs and win the compliments from the residents.) Thus,the leaders are persuaded to listen the suggestions from the people when it comes to the decisions related very close to their daily lives. ( As such, effective leaders must listen to the public opinion with regard to their daily life to strengthen the governance and leadership)

ts2 On the other hand,people would challenge if all the things should be discussed with the public,how to ensure the efficiency as well as the stableness of society?（ on the other hand, people..challenge how to ensure the efficiency as well as the stableness of society if it is not possible for the leaders to discuss everything with the public. (There no doubt that when it comes to the laws,leader should be as impartial as possible and stick to the principles. ( There is no doubt the effective leaders should be as impartial as possible and stick to the principles when making the policies and implementing the lasws in practice.)  
-Take the case of education of example（Take the case of juvenile delinquence as an example） ,if both children at the same age,but one comes from a decent family with power and pecuniary advantages,the other comes from an totally impoverished family( There are two children at the same age but coming from one decent family with… and one from an impoverished family respectively) .They involved in an crime case and both were arrested,however,as for the venality,the one from the better family received less punishment.If the equality of law reflected like this,I don’t think there is any need to have it.As a result,the leader should persist to their principles and be solid impartial to the executives of the law.
( 这个分析有失焦点，如何体现public opinion，两个家庭是小众个别并非集体意识，也许在这个事情上，公众舆论就是严惩失害者的富贵子弟，议论的焦点就不清晰了；但如果再改动下栗子，就是两个家庭中，家庭优渥的并非是施害者，而是被家庭贫穷的孩子逼迫去做的且自身已受到伤害，即便公众的呼声是对富贵与贫穷阶级的孩子不应当有区分，作为公正的领导者则应深入事件本身，为富贵的孩子酌情处分并安排心理治疗，而不会被社会仇富心态所影响。
ts3 Last but not least,I’d like to qualify my explanation.Even though stick to the principle of law is of advantage of the most time,there are exceptional cases.For example,the resource of people is not always equal,actually,is not equal for most time.To be specific,the chances for people vary a lot.Unfortunately,when the inequality caused a poor boy to defend himself by attacking the one who bullied him.This situation,for the sake of the ethos,we need to give a chance to him,instead of escaping the penalty,but less.
Principle不一定僅限於Law，可以是價值觀可以是信條。比如最近的blockbuster战狼，当华工要撤离非洲时，有限的救援力量只能支持中国公民时，好的政治领袖就会看到中国公民不是单个个体，而是与非洲当地人结婚生子，如果撤离，那么所有的华工及非洲家属同胞都要撤离，这实际上是做出有违常理或公众舆论的判断，但坚持了作为一个领袖的领导原则，反对种族歧视的价值选择。虽然是一步电影，但是被公众大为推崇，領導力的體現。。。。（可以写成英文 但怕我說的不清楚）

taylor1995UID: 3820421

issue 50: Government officials should rely on their own judgment rather than unquestioningly carry out the will of the people they serve.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.


Intro
In democratic society, the government is responsible for the public. The government makes decisions through their own judgments instead of the will of people. Nevertheless, the government and people are restricting each other. The decisions only depend on the government are lopsided, which won’t show the interests of the people. Therefore, the most effective way of government to make decisions of development is, considering various factors, combining their own judgment and some common opinion from the public.

Middle
There is no denying that politicians and other government experts are more informed and thus have better judgment and perspective than do the general public. For example, in late 1920s, the economic crisis exploded in America which dragged the financial situation and deprived many American’s right to enjoy sufficient life and many people lost their jobs. The whole country was in a state of chaos. After four years, the new president of America Franklin took a series of policies for reform, recovery and relief. His prescription began with rectifying finance. Then, the reform was extended to agriculture field and industry. Roosevelt’s “New Deal” ensured the stable development of the economy. It’ s obvious to show that the government’ reformation help people get rid of predicament.

However, the government is subject to the people. Only based on the government, the decisions-making will be out of balance, which is harmful to political democracy and socialism. Then the country will become despotic. An salient example is the colonial period of China. In 1900s, the Qing government ignored people’s voice, eventually leading to pay indemnities and cede territory. On the countrary, western countries follow the principles of equality. In 1900s, after the two industrial revolutions, they got great development in economy, industry and culture. Thus, listen the public’s will is essential to develop our society.

On the other hand, it is not enough to only focus on the public. The development of society is determined by many factors, not just the government and the people.