issue207 rituals and ceremonies考前最后一篇请大家指教的issue

louchen1984UID: 172975

207. "Rituals and ceremonies help define a culture. Without them, societies or groups of people have a diminished sense of who they are."

The text:

I agree with the speaker that rituals and ceremonies represent many features of a culture, to a certain extent, which help to preserve a people's identity. However, rituals and ceremonies are not the only ways to protect a culture from assimilation or even extinction, and without them , an isolated people can still maintain their cultural identity.

Rituals and ceremonies, as a vital part of culture, reflect many significant features -- customs, mores and traditions of a people, and their existence remind people that they are different from other peoples. People in different countries or regions have their distinctive ceremonies and rituals, such as wedding ceremony, funeral, and fete, to name a  few. All these special ceremonies distinguish a people from others. For example, most European people usually wear white voile and black suits in the wedding ceremony and hold the ceremony at church, with the wishes of priest; while Chinese people wear traditional red cheong-sam and long silk coat, and usually drink much in the ceremony. It is trough the process of holding ceremonies and rituals that people regain a feeling of old days. Meanwhile such process makes them feel that they are not very much different from their grandparents or parents, and they belong to one group,  in which  its members share the same conventions and certain values. To a certain extent, ceremonies and rituals pass down a people's traditions from generation to generation. They both lend distinctiveness to a culture and provide people with a strong feeling of identity. Therefore they are somewhat meaningful in defining a culture, especially under today's inevitable trend of the cultural combination between peoples.

However, rituals and ceremonies are not the only means to preserve a culture. Every culture has its distinctive features or habits in their daily life which people belonging to other cultures do not have. In most cases, one can easily tell a person's nationality by observing the way he talks, eats, and deals with daily affairs. For instance, in most countries people nods their heads when they agree, but Indians shake their hands when they agree; people in such countries like to hug their friends when they meet, while some prefer to kiss the forehead or cheek of their friends; Japanese people like to touch people to show intimacy when they are talking, yet Englishmen like to keep a distance with others during a conversation. All the behavior and habits reflected in a people is obvious and make it difficult to forget their cultures. And since these habits and traditions are cultivated deeply in their mind, they will always remember them and never abandon their cultural features.

In conclusion, rituals and ceremonies do help a culture to last long and avoid the fortune to be assimilated or eliminated, yet there are other ways to reach these purposes -- the distinctive habits and traditions of cultures influence significantly on people, and as a result hardly will they forget who they are and which culture they belong to.

乒乓球爱上九月UID: 162925

占座 晚上交作业 :D

davidjackyUID: 135962

Taken!

乒乓球爱上九月UID: 162925

207. "Rituals and ceremonies help define a culture. Without them, societies or groups of people have a diminished sense of who they are."

The text:

I agree with the speaker that rituals and ceremonies represent many features of a culture, to a certain extent, which help to preserve a people's identity. However, rituals and ceremonies are not the only ways to protect a culture from assimilation or even extinction, and without them , an isolated people can still maintain their cultural identity.题目说没有A会削弱B,而不是说没有A,B就不存在了,这个细微的差别应该引起注意. 本题关键词:define

Rituals and ceremonies, as a vital part of culture, reflect many significant features -- customs, mores and traditions of a people, and their existence remind people that they are different from other peoples. reflect features 和 define之间到底是什么联系?你认为是同一个意思么?People in different countries or regions have their distinctive ceremonies and rituals, such as wedding ceremony, funeral, and fete, to name a few. All these special ceremonies distinguish a people from others. For example, most European people usually wear white voile and black suits in the wedding ceremony and hold the ceremony at church, with the wishes of priest; while Chinese people wear traditional red cheong-sam and long silk coat, and usually drink much in the ceremony. [B]It is trough the process of holding ceremonies and rituals that people regain a feeling of old days.[/B] 这句话是服务于哪个意思?不要突然出现新的观点.  Meanwhile such process makes them feel that they are not very much different from their grandparents or parents, and they belong to one group, in which its members share the same conventions and certain values. To a certain extent, ceremonies and rituals pass down a people's traditions from generation to generation. They both lend distinctiveness to a culture and provide people with a strong feeling of identity. Therefore they are somewhat meaningful in defining a culture, [B]especially under today's inevitable trend of the cultural combination between peoples.[/B] 出现不必要的意思分支  

However, rituals and ceremonies are not the only means to preserve a culture.题目其实并没有说这是一个only means Every culture has its distinctive features or habits in their daily life which people belonging to other cultures do not have. In most cases, one can easily tell a person's nationality by observing the way he talks, eats, and deals with daily affairs. For instance, in most countries people nods their heads when they agree, but Indians shake their hands when they agree; people in such countries like to hug their friends when they meet, while some prefer to kiss the forehead or cheek of their friends; Japanese people like to touch people to show intimacy when they are talking, yet Englishmen like to keep a distance with others during a conversation. All the behavior and habits reflected in a people is obvious and make it difficult to forget their cultures. And since these habits and traditions are cultivated deeply in their mind, they will always remember them and never abandon their cultural features.单从你这一段的论述来说,论证的角度应该从个人的角度来说比较好,比如人可以通过什么什么找到自己的归属感而不是说哪些可以帮助人找到归属感.  

In conclusion, rituals and ceremonies do help a culture to last long and avoid the fortune to be assimilated or eliminated, yet there are other ways to reach these purposes -- the distinctive habits and traditions of cultures influence significantly on people, and as a result hardly will they forget who they are and which culture they belong to.


文章的观点应该做一点调整,倒数第二段的ts也要改动一下.语言没有问题了,建议摸考不要用这样的题目.可以稍微简单一点.

chrisssssssUID: 176321

楼主马上要考了吗？
我22日，你先还是我先？ :)  :)

ivyshoulUID: 195537

每次看斑竹大人的修改都很佩服,自己就想不到那么多...

chrisssssssUID: 176321

呵呵， “不必要的意思分支”，很有启示，我就容易在一段了写着写着就跑了。

louchen1984UID: 172975

我23考 这l两天都没有机井的！郁闷！

louchen1984UID: 172975

define  是不是To serve to distinguish; characterize:的意思哪？
我之前以为是决定，定义的意思，汗～～
看来英文的一词多义也很麻烦

I agree with the speaker that rituals and ceremonies represent many features of a culture, to a certain extent, which help to preserve a people's identity. However, rituals and ceremonies are not the only ways to protect a culture from assimilation or even extinction, and without them , an isolated people can still maintain their cultural identity.题目说没有A会削弱B,而不是说没有A,B就不存在了,这个细微的差别应该引起注意. 本题关键词:define

改成;

I agree with the speaker that rituals and ceremonies represent many features of a culture, to a certain extent, which help to preserve a people's identity. However, were there not rutials and ceremonies, an isolated people can still maintain its cultural identity. Since there are many other ways to protect a culture from assimilation or even exitinction.

Rituals and ceremonies, as a vital part of culture, distingush a culture from others. They represent many significant features -- customs, mores and traditions of a culture and their existence remind people that they are different from other peoples. People in different countries or regions have their distinctive ceremonies and rituals, such as wedding ceremony, funeral, and fete, to name a few. All these special ceremonies distinguish a people from others. For example, most European people usually wear white voile and black suits in the wedding ceremony and hold the ceremony at church, with the wishes of priest; while Chinese people wear traditional red cheong-sam and long silk coat, and usually drink much in the ceremony. It is trough the process of holding ceremonies and rituals that people regain a feeling of pride in their culture. Meanwhile such process makes them feel that they are not very much different from their grandparents or parents, and they belong to one group, in which its members share the same conventions and certain values. To a certain extent, ceremonies and rituals pass down a people's traditions from generation to generation. They both lend distinctiveness to a culture and provide people with a strong feeling of identity. Therefore they are somewhat meaningful in defining a culture.

However,  without the help of rituals and ceremonies ,a people can still  preserve its culture. Every culture has its distinctive features or habits in their daily life which people belonging to other cultures do not have. In most cases, one can easily tell a person's nationality by observing the way he talks, eats, and deals with daily affairs. For instance, in most countries people nods their heads when they agree, but Indians shake their hands when they agree; people in such countries like to hug their friends when they meet, while some prefer to kiss the forehead or cheek of their friends; Japanese people like to touch people to show intimacy when they are talking, yet Englishmen like to keep a distance with others during a conversation. All the behavior and habits reflected in a people is obvious and make it difficult to forget their cultures. And since these habits and traditions are cultivated deeply in their mind, they will always remember them and never abandon their cultural features.（这段不作大的调整了，今天开学了没时间了）

In conclusion, rituals and ceremonies do help a culture to last long and avoid the fortune to be assimilated or eliminated, yet there are other ways to reach these purposes -- the distinctive habits and traditions of cultures influence significantly on people, and as a result hardly will they forget who they are and which culture they belong to.

非常感谢版主的经典评论， 我最近写着写着就不知道自己在写什么了，汗～～

davidjackyUID: 135962

https://bbs.gter.net/showthre ... 1264415#post1264415

No.1 issue207 rituals and ceremonies考前最后一篇请大家指教的issue
207. "Rituals and ceremonies help define a culture. Without them, societies or groups of people have a diminished sense of who they are."

The text:

I agree with the speaker that rituals and ceremonies represent many features of a culture, to a certain extent, which help to preserve a people's identity. However, rituals and ceremonies are not the only ways[ way] to protect a culture from assimilation or even extinction, and without them , an isolated people can still maintain their cultural identity. [前面是an person后面是their，注意这样的小问题，不要写了就传上]
[第一段提出自己的观点，rituals and ceremonies不是唯一preserve people’s cultural identify]
Rituals and ceremonies, as a vital part of culture, reflect many significant features -- customs, mores[ mores,逗号要的] and traditions of a people[ a people？好好想想], and their existence remind people that they are different from other peoples[ others]. People in different countries or regions have their distinctive ceremonies and rituals, such as wedding ceremony, funeral, and fete, to name a few. All these special ceremonies distinguish a people from others. For example, most European people usually wear white voile and black suits in the wedding ceremony and hold the ceremony at[ in the] church, with the wishes of priest; while Chinese people wear traditional red cheong-sam and long silk coat, and usually drink much[ a lot] in the ceremony. It is trough the process of holding ceremonies and rituals that people regain a feeling of old days. Meanwhile such process makes them feel that they are not very much different from their grandparents or parents, and they belong to one group, in which its members share the same conventions and certain values. To a certain extent, ceremonies and rituals pass down a people's traditions from generation to generation. They both lend distinctiveness to a culture and provide people with a strong feeling of identity. Therefore they are somewhat meaningful in defining a culture, especially under today's inevitable trend of the cultural combination between peoples.

However, rituals and ceremonies are not the only means to preserve a culture. Every culture has its distinctive features or habits in their daily life which people belonging to other cultures do not have. In most cases, one can easily tell a person's nationality by observing the way he talks, eats, and deals with daily affairs. For instance, in most countries people nods their heads when they agree, but Indians shake their hands when they agree; people in such countries like to hug their friends when they meet, while some prefer to kiss the forehead or cheek of their friends; Japanese people like to touch people to show intimacy when they are talking, yet Englishmen like to keep a distance with others during a conversation. All the behavior and habits reflected in a people is obvious and make it difficult to forget their cultures. And since these habits and traditions are cultivated deeply in their mind, they will always remember them and never abandon their cultural features.
[这段问题不大 ，但是希望能够有两段来论述]


In conclusion, rituals and ceremonies do help a culture to last long and avoid the fortune to be assimilated or eliminated, yet there are other ways to reach these purposes -- the distinctive habits and traditions of cultures influence significantly on people, and as a result hardly will they forget who they are and which culture they belong to.
应该说恭喜你这么多天的努力有了一定的结果，加点运气的因素，你一定会考的很好，你的文章我也看了一些，功底不错，尽管我没有认真的改过。

louchen1984UID: 172975

：）谢谢davidjacky， 托你吉言啦
不过很多文章我还是不会写，考到就惨了