[推荐]issue5 蚂蚁交作业 欢迎结对子

cathyantUID: 193285

Topic:
A nation should require all its students to sudy the same national curriculum until they enter college rather than allow different parts of the country to determine which courses to offer.

My answer:
       The curriculum a country provides to its students before they enter colleges includes primarily two kinds of lessons,that is, culture and practical knowledge.In my opinion, the former should be a national curriculum while the latter may be decided by the local committee of education.

             Conformity in the curriculum concerning culture can serve to transmit to the students the civilization that nation values and cherishes.For instance,it is one of the purposes of the education on culture to teach children to be a patriotic citizen and subsequently devote themselves to the development of the country. Since a student enters the elementary school,he is taught that how large is his country,what is the population, what natural resources the country is blessed with.Through such education the little child gets to know that what is his country like. When he is older,he will learns about the history and culture of the nation on class. How their ancestors migrated to this land, how they fought back enemies invading their home and how fulgent their culture is. Consequently,the student realizes that his motherland is a great country and how brave his forefathers were. This kind of curriculum should be conformed nationwide because it will deviate from the initial goal if the text books are composed by local authority out of their own purposes. It is hard to imagine the destructive effect if students of a region temporarily plagued by civil war read the text books written by local government propagandizing independence and anti-union fallacy. Similarly, it is through education a nation instill into the students the values and ideology that the nation is based on.A socialist country would not allow its prosperous port cities raving capitalism in the text books.To maintain the solidarity of a country and popularize the values a country holds,a national curriculum is necessary for schools.

            On the other hand,a school also provides its students with practical knowledge on which they may make a living.Curriculum on maths,languages,physics and social science are an important part of what students must learn before entering colleges,since such knowledge prepare the students for the professions in the future.As demands for different jobs vary from place to place in a country,it is more favorable of the local government  to make decision what curriculum should be priorities.For example,in a highly-developed city elementary knowledge on finance,economy and trade may better cater to the needs of students since such knowledge are requisite for them to live in such a competitive society  or get them ready for the curriculum in colleges while knowledge on agriculture and fishery are more useful for students in rural areas.Furthermore,it is highly possible rustic students cannot afford to pursue further education,a conformed curriculum centered on,say,economics,will merely prepare them for the life forward. In sum,A national curriculum on practical skills will undermine the effectiveness of learning and ignore the varied needs of different areas.

            As what students learn before entering colleges plays an important role in their life in the future,a country should be prudent when composing the curriculum. While a national curriculum concerning culture better serves the purpose of educating the children to love their motherland and maintaining social;stability, a curriculum on practical disciplines varied with specific needs of different areas are more favorable for the regional as well as the national development.

cathyantUID: 193285

乒乓球说了要给我改的啊~~~~~~~~~

kaoroUID: 189156

不知道你找到对子没？

The curriculum a country provides to its students before they enter colleges includes primarily two kinds of lessons,that is, culture and practical knowledge.In my opinion, the former should be a national curriculum while the latter may be decided by the local committee of education.（这个思路不错哦 我没有想到 学习！）

Conformity in the curriculum concerning culture can serve to transmit to the students the civilization that （加个the好像清楚一点）nation values and cherishes.For instance,it is one of the purposes of the education on culture（干脆加个that做成强调句吧？） to teach children to be a patriotic citizen and subsequently devote themselves to the development of the country. Since a student enters the elementary school,he is taught that how large is his country,what is the population, what natural resources the country is blessed with.Through such education the little child gets to know that what is his country like.（what his country is like?) When he is older,he will learns(learn) about the history and culture of the nation on (in)class. How their ancestors migrated to this land, how they fought back enemies invading their home and how fulgent their culture is. Consequently,the student realizes that his motherland is a great country and (and前后结构对称比较好）how brave his forefathers were. This kind of curriculum should be conformed nationwide because it will deviate from the initial goal if the text books are composed by local authority out of their own purposes. It is hard to imagine the destructive effect if students of a region temporarily plagued by civil war read the text books written by local government propagandizing independence and anti-union fallacy. Similarly, it is through education（少了个that吧） a nation instill into the students the values and ideology that the nation is based on.A socialist country would not allow its prosperous port cities raving capitalism in the text books.To maintain the solidarity of a country and popularize the values a country holds,a national curriculum is necessary for schools.（这里是举中国的例子吧？沿海城市资本主义化？不知道ETS的RATER会不会同意哦～毕竟他们是资本主义的，用其他的例子可能比较好）

On the other hand,a school also provides its students with practical knowledge on which they may make a living.Curriculum on maths,languages,physics and social science are an important part of what students must learn before entering colleges,since such knowledge prepare the students for the professions in the future.（这句话的结构不错哦）As demands for different jobs vary from place to place in a country,it is more favorable of the local government to make decision what curriculum should be priorities.For example,in a highly-developed city elementary knowledge on finance,economy and trade may better cater to the needs of students since such knowledge are requisite for them to live in such a competitive society or get them ready for the curriculum in colleges while knowledge on agriculture and fishery are more useful for students in rural areas.Furthermore,it is highly possible rustic students cannot afford to pursue further education,a conformed curriculum centered on,say,economics,will merely prepare them for the life forward. In sum,A national curriculum on practical skills will undermine the effectiveness of learning and ignore the varied needs of different areas.

As what students learn before entering colleges plays an important role in their life in the future,a country should be prudent when composing the curriculum. While a national curriculum concerning culture better serves the purpose of educating the children to love their motherland and maintaining social;stability, a curriculum on practical disciplines varied with specific needs of different areas are more favorable（换个词吧，前面用过了 exists superior impact on怎么样？） for the regional as well as the national development.

总体写的很不错哦 如果是限时的....我只能说 太佩服啦！！！^_^
不过觉得你的强调句结构好像有问题 it is ....that里面的that好像是不能省略的吧？

cathyantUID: 193285

谢谢谢谢
结对子努力中
水平不高 给别人条错 慌~

nightsky2004UID: 155946

The curriculum a country provides to its students before they enter colleges includes primarily two kinds of lessons, that is, culture and practical knowledge. In my opinion, the former should be a national curriculum while the latter may be decided by the local committee of education.
首段亮出了你的观点，似乎是一个挺新的观点，把curriculum分成两部分，然后再分开讨论，想法有些意思，接着看看
Conformity in the curriculum concerning culture can serve to transmit to the students the civilization that nation values and cherishes. For instance, it is one of the purposes of the education on culture这里的on culture显得多余了 to teach children to be a patriotic citizen and subsequently devote themselves to the development of the country. Since a student enters the elementary school, he is taught that how large is his country, what is the population, what natural resources the country is blessed with.这一句话显得罗嗦了点，用the general information about his/her country, such as…似乎显得好些 Through such education the little child gets to know that这个that可以去掉吧，what本身就是一个两用词呀 what is his country like. When he is older, he will learns？是不是错了 about the history and culture of the nation on class. How their ancestors migrated to this land, how they fought back enemies invading their home and how fulgent their culture is. Consequently, the student realizes that his motherland is a great country and how brave his forefathers were. This kind of curriculum should be conformed nationwide because it will deviate from the initial goal if the text books are composed by local authority out of their own purposes. 这些东西会出现什么问题呢，如果地方编辑课程的话。本身就是事实呀，没有什么更改的吧 It is hard to imagine the destructive effect if students of a region temporarily plagued by civil war read the text books written by local government propagandizing independence and anti-union fallacy.例子并不是很恰当呀，因为本文就在考虑课程的问题，最好不要加入别的因素。换一个好点 Similarly, it is through education a nation instill into the students the values and ideology that the nation is based on.这句话挺别扭，改为education is a major way that nation…似乎好点 A socialist country would not allow its prosperous port cities raving capitalism in the text books. To maintain the solidarity of a country and popularize the values a country holds, a national curriculum is necessary for schools.段尾的总结不太到位，没有体现出culture
本段说的是culture curriculum应该由国家定。Thesis不错，但是论述得不好，爱国主义这些东西简单说就是moral education的一部分，当然是必要的。但是其他的譬如和integrity之类的东西也需要说一下呀，最好把culture改为moral之类的词汇
On the other hand, a school also provides its students with practical knowledge on which they may make a living. Curriculum on math, languages, physics and social science前面改为courses, such as…如何？ are an important part of what students must learn before entering colleges, since such knowledge prepare the students for the professions in the 这里的the似乎可以去掉 future.这句话读着很别扭，而且感觉有些语法问题 As demands for different jobs vary from place to place in a country, it is more favorable of the local government to make decision what curriculum should be priorities. For example, in a highly-developed city elementary knowledge on finance, economy and trade may better你用的是比较及，但是比较对象呢？ cater to the needs of students since such knowledge are requisite for them to live in such a competitive society or get them ready for the curriculum in colleges大学和社会要求的不一样吧，不是说大学就需要elementary knowledge on finance吧 while knowledge on agriculture and fishery are more useful for students in rural areas. Furthermore, it is highly possible rustic students cannot afford to pursue further education, a conformed curriculum centered on, say, economics, will merely prepare them for the life forward.life forward是什么意思？ In sum, a national curriculum on practical skills will undermine the effectiveness of learning and ignore the varied needs of different areas.
本段没有说地方可以定技术课程。基本上说出了要点，但是例子似乎不是太好，除了因地制宜外，学生自己的兴趣也是很重要的，最好再改改
As what students learn before entering colleges plays an important role in their life in the future,a country should be prudent when composing the curriculum. While a national curriculum concerning culture better serves the purpose of educating the children to love their motherland and maintaining social;stability,这里说得罗嗦了，moral education就可以了 a curriculum on practical disciplines varied with specific needs of different areas are more favorable for the regional as well as the national development.
搂主的文笔还是不错的，通篇文章没有什么明显的语言错误，表述得也算清楚，就是论证的力度显得不够，再改改吧，加油呀

cathyantUID: 193285

谢谢帮我看文章的朋友
请留下你们文章的连接 我会去看的!!!

谢谢不尽!!

静静发呆UID: 194347

你有没有结到对子啊
什么时候考啊？
如果对方很菜会不会考虑啊？