issue3第三篇 当务之急与百年大计 24小势必会杂：）

zhangqiang928UID: 188538

Issue3  第3篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧！
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作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：60分14秒     539 words
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It is more important to allocate money for immediate, existing social problems than to spend it on long-term research that might help future generations.
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Nowadays an ongoing controversy has drawn most people's attention that whether we should allocate money for long-term research that might help future generations by the result. Money should speed on which field ,this depend on at least three factors, such as the level of the country's economic, the level of life for citizen and the capability of the researchers. Comparing the complexity of the policy of the research, I deny the assumption that money should allocate the money for immediate.
To begin with, the level of the country's economic is always affect the policy of research. Firstly , if the country is wealth maybe it will have enough money to speed on long-term research ,while if the country is poor ,it is possible that it will not have enough money to do that .Actually the problems which need to solve immediately of work ,poor , reform the education, the disease as well as increase the productions of the industry and agriculture are important for stabilization of the society and  development, if allocate money for them ,it will have a result quickly. Take the SARS which is a disease infect others through the air for example , this kind of disease made about 1000 peoples die at around a month , in that period and people wouldn't like to go to shop even now when we concern it many people feel faired ,so in that case the government must  speed the money on research the disease, if they didn't do that maybe something instability thing would happen. Admittedly, a steady society not only should make the citizen feel that the conditions are better than before but also should develop the science and the culture. So spend the money for them will benefit everyone of the society.
    Besides , and the level of life for citizen also determine the policy of research , if the citizens in the country are poor the government should allocate money for immediate priority .In spite that ,speeding the money on long-term research is necessary for the society such as the element of math , chemistry and physics . although  the result of these subjects don't like the electron and mechanics can transform the production, but as the long history to see these will benefit for the human being .For instance ,the big country which have a lot scientists are researching the astronomy , at present we can't see the conclusion ,but all the men believe that this will make people someday live in the other stars when population is too much to live the earth .
    Finally, we should consider the capability of researchers ,it is possible that the researchers for immediate are more excellent than the long-term researchers , in that case we should let the long-term researcher get the money. Furthermore ,the capability of the scientist affect the result of the research ,the meaning is that if the scientist is very wisom they will have  more chance to get good result.
To sum up , according to what I consider ,in our society the government should allocate the money for immediate ,and also speed money on the long-term research that will help the future generations. What more different country should decide to allocate money for research depend on those factors.  
谢批我的文章,交个朋友一个改文章罢

有机会请多拍砖,每拍必回拍,多谢
第一篇https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mod=viewthread&tid=250654 issu121
第二篇https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mod=viewthread&tid=250916 argument120
第三篇https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mod=viewthread&tid=251025 issue122
西安外国语学院 3月25日

当阳光照遍每个角落
心情像风般漂泊不停留
抛开界限 快乐行走
我有属于自己的方式做梦

mythztUID: 162409

------正文------
Nowadays an ongoing controversy has drawn most people's attention that whether we should allocate money for long-term research that might help future generations by the result. Money should speed(spend) on which field ,this depend on at least three factors, such as the level of the country's economic, the level of life for citizen and the capability of the researchers. Comparing(后面似乎没有什么比较啊？) the complexity of the policy of the research, I deny the assumption(为何用这个词？题目是论断不是假设，换成assertion怎样？) that money should allocate the money for immediate(后面是不是少了什么).

To begin with, the level of the country's economic is(is去掉，后面有affect) always affects the policy of research. Firstly , if the country is wealth(wealthy) maybe it will have enough money to speed(spend) on long-term research ,while(but) if the country is poor ,it is possible that it will not have enough money to do that .Actually the problems which need to solve immediately of(of的用法没看懂，后面是列举，可考虑用一下such as) work ,poor , reform the education, the disease as well as increase the productions of the industry and agriculture are important for stabilization of the society and development(没看懂这句，感觉句子结构不够对称，有名词又有动宾短语), if allocate money for them (此句allocate主语是否缺失？),it will have a result quickly. Take the SARS(后面这个修饰可用插入语) which is a disease infect others through the air for example , this kind of disease made about 1000 peoples die at around a month (made……die感觉有点怪，用killed就行了吧), in that period and(and多余了？) people wouldn't like to go to shop even now when we concern(recall) it many people feel faired(afraid) ,so in that case the government must speed(spend) the money on research(researching) the disease, if they didn't do that maybe something(some) instability thing would happen. Admittedly, a steady society not only should make the citizens feel that the conditions are better than before but also should develop the science and the culture. So spend the money for them will benefit everyone of the society.
第一段写到后来似乎在讲把钱花到immediate problems上的好处，与你的主题句好像不相干啊
Besides , and the level of life for citizen also determines the policy of research , if the citizens in the country are poor the government should allocate money for immediate priority .In spite that(这个什么意思？) ,speeding(spending) the money on long-term research is necessary for the society such as the element(?) of math , chemistry and physics . although(Although) the result of these subjects don't like the electron and mechanics can transform the production, but as the long history to see these will benefit for the human being .For instance ,the big country(some powerful countries) which have a lot scientists are researching the astronomy , at present we can't see the conclusion ,but all the men believe that this will make people someday live in the other stars when population is too much to live the earth .
仍然感觉没扣紧主题句，而是讲long-term research的好处
Finally, we should consider the capability of researchers ,it is possible that the researchers for immediate? are more excellent than the long-term researchers , in that case we should let the long-term researcher get the money. Furthermore ,the capability of the scientistsaffect the result of the research ,the meaning is that if the scientist is very wisom(smart) they will have more chances to get good result.
这个段落好像有点跑题了
To sum up , according to what I consider ,in our society the government should allocate the money for immediate ,and also speed(spend) money on the long-term research that will help the future generations. What more different country should decide to allocate money for research depend on those factors(这个句子表达有问题，建议改成What should a country allocates money for depends on those factors mentioned above).

楼主的表达可能还要加强一下，小问题如标点的使用请重视。我的水平比你还菜，写一篇500字不到都要两个多小时，很羡慕你的速度啊！有时间能帮我看看吗？3.22考，现在感觉火烧眉毛了 :(

指向大海UID: 158737

来晚了呵呵
语法方面楼上的改的很好了，我觉得有点严重呢，很多句子不是简单的单复数时态的问题，已经影响理解了，望重视。我来讲讲主题句的问题
Nowadays an ongoing controversy has drawn most people's attention that whether we should allocate money for long-term research that might help future generations by the result. Money should speed on which field ,this depend on at least three factors, such as the level of the country's economic, the level of life for citizen and the capability of the researchers. Comparing the complexity of the policy of the research, I deny the assumption that money should allocate the money for immediate.
To begin with, the level of the country's economic is always affect the policy of research. Firstly , if the country is wealth maybe it will have enough money to speed on long-term research ,while if the country is poor ,it is possible that it will not have enough money to do that .Actually the problems which need to solve immediately of work ,poor , reform the education, the disease as well as increase the productions of the industry and agriculture are important for stabilization of the society and development, if allocate money for them ,it will have a result quickly. Take the SARS which is a disease infect others through the air for example , this kind of disease made about 1000 peoples die at around a month , in that period and people wouldn't like to go to shop even now when we concern it many people feel faired ,so in that case the government must speed the money on research the disease, if they didn't do that maybe something instability thing would happen. Admittedly, a steady society not only should make the citizen feel that the conditions are better than before but also should develop the science and the culture. So spend the money for them will benefit everyone of the society.这里可以说穷的话只要考虑吃住富裕了还可以考虑给艺术投钱和我们国家情况很像，如果你要说sars就要改主题句
Besides , and the level of life for citizen also determine the policy of research , if the citizens in the country are poor the government should allocate money for immediate priority .这里不是和你第一段的主题句很符合么In spite that ,speeding the money on long-term research is necessary for the society such as the element of math , chemistry and physics . although the result of these subjects don't like the electron and mechanics can transform the production, but as the long history to see these will benefit for the human being .For instance ,the big country which have a lot scientists are researching the astronomy , at present we can't see the conclusion ,but all the men believe that this will make people someday live in the other stars when population is too much to live the earth .
Finally, we should consider the capability of researchers ,it is possible that the researchers for immediate are more excellent than the long-term researchers , in that case we should let the long-term researcher get the money. Furthermore ,the capability of the scientist affect the result of the research ,the meaning is that if the scientist is very wisom they will have more chance to get good result.
To sum up , according to what I consider ,in our society the government should allocate the money for immediate ,and also speed money on the long-term research that will help the future generations. What more different country should decide to allocate money for research depend on those factors.
典型问题：一开始不想好每段写什么，分论点不错，但写着写着就跑题了，我建议你第一段就写给紧急问题先投钱第2段写是你的B2和B1的合集，第三段可以考虑用过一个观点，多半时候小人物做的贡献更大你这第三个分论点就是一个有争议的ISSUE，分论点最好大家都认同的
还有每段越写越少考试时要注意时间的分配均匀的好
每段空一行！