ISSUE83 还有一个星期就考水平差啊，求砖:(

comingsoonUID: 175137

Issue83  第6篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧！
------摘要------
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：41分33秒     487words
从2005年2月23日13时20分到2005年2月23日14时41分
------题目------
Government should preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state, even though these areas are often extremely remote and thus accessible to only a few people.
------正文------
While there are more and more natural wilderness areas are being destroyed and invaded thus leading to harmful effects both to nature and to society, an advice arises that government should preserve these publicly owned areas in their natural state even though these areas are often extremely remote and thus accessible to only a few people. As far as I am concerned, I strongly agree with the assertion since it would undoubtedly benefits a lot to us.

To begin with, these wilderness areas often serve as precious and indispensable places for most of the animals in the earth to survive and propagate. As is known, everyday a wide region of natural areas on average are being disturbed and invaded by human activities such as dissforestation and pushing harmful chemicals and so on. Thus along with the severe trend of environment damage, more and more natural animals have lost their habitat and no new appropriate places have been offered. Accordingly, many rare species have become extinct. Therefore, the food chain is seriously destroyed which could necessarily lead to the extinction of more species and thus would bring out greatly harmful influence to the survival of human race that is also a common member of all the species in the world. Considering this, it is the obligation of government to try best to preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in order to protect the integrity of the all the species in the world.

Furthermore, protecting these wilderness areas is of great beneficial to human beings since they play a vital role in the maintaining a good condition of environment. To support this point, one needs to look no further than rain forest in the torrid zones. The statistics data in a scientific experiment shows that almost 30 percents of oxygen in the world are generated and replenished by the rain forest. Moreover, another scientific research reports that rain forest has a significant adjustment to the global climate. In other words, damaging to these rain forests undoubtedly would cause egregious harmful effects to environment which ultimately would result in huge intimidation to the development of human society.

In addition, wilderness areas in natural state serve in many cases as the supplier of many raw materials in industry and other manufacturing. For instance, various precious materials to make the famous Chinese traditional medicine only survive in those undeveloped areas such as wildness areas. Therefore these areas do deserve particular preservation in order to ensure the normal manufacturing of these medicines and other related goods which accordingly ensure the prosperity of medicine manufacturing.

To sum up, though preserving publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state even these areas are often extremely remote and thus accessible to only a few people seems unprofitable in a short time, government should try best to keep these places in their natural state in that they are guarantee of both human survival and the development of society.

comingsoonUID: 175137

sigh, up

GrowlywolfUID: 200584

While there are more and more natural wilderness areas are being destroyed and invaded thus leading to harmful effects both to nature and to society, an advice arises that government should preserve these publicly owned areas in their natural state even though these areas are often extremely remote and thus accessible to only a few people. As far as I am concerned, I strongly agree with the assertion since it would undoubtedly benefits a lot to us.

To begin with, these wilderness areas often serve as precious and indispensable places for most of the animals in the earth to survive and propagate. As is known[As known], everyday a wide region of natural areas on average[on average用在这里整个句子的语序不对吧] are being disturbed and invaded by human activities such as disforestation and pushing[emitting] harmful chemicals and so on. Thus along with the severe[severe感觉有点怪怪的，金山说本词暗指遵守严格的标准或高度的原则；该词常暗示强加苛刻的条件] trend of environment damage, more and more [natural多此一举，去掉] animals have lost their habitat and no new appropriate places have been offered. Accordingly, many rare species have become extinct. Therefore, the food chain is seriously destroyed which could necessarily lead to the extinction of more species and thus would bring out greatly harmful influence to the survival of human race[human being吧，不要标新立异] that is also a common member of all the species in the world. Considering this, it is the obligation of government to try best to preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in order to protect the integrity of the all the species in the world.

Furthermore, protecting these wilderness areas is of great beneficial to human beings since they play a vital role in the maintaining a good condition of environment. To support this point, one needs to look no further than rain forest in the torrid zones. The statistics data in a scientific experiment shows that almost 30 percents of oxygen in the world are generated and replenished by the rain forest. Moreover, another scientific research reports that rain forest has a significant adjustment to the global climate. In other words, damaging [to去掉] these rain forests undoubtedly would cause egregious harmful effects to environment which ultimately would result in huge intimidation to the development of human society.

In addition, wilderness areas in natural state serve in many cases as the supplier of many raw materials in industry and other manufacturing. For instance, various precious materials to make the famous Chinese traditional medicine only survive in those undeveloped areas such as wildness areas. Therefore these areas do deserve particular preservation in order to ensure the normal manufacturing of these medicines and other related goods[products好一些吧] which accordingly ensure the prosperity of medicine manufacturing[这个定语从句感觉怪怪的，是不是写重了?].

To sum up, though preserving publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state[一个名词性短语，后面接一个转折的句子，语法上有点问题吧] even these areas are often extremely remote and thus accessible to only a few people [前面还是后面少了一个关系代词？] seems unprofitable in a short time, government should try best to keep these places in their natural state in that[介词引导定语从句先行词能用that?] they are guarantee of both human survival and the development of society.

整体思路尚可，感觉第二段应该保护动植物并重，不要只说保护动物，这样显得更全面。
语言比偶强多了，个别地方可能是为了写复杂句而写，结果有点乱。

偶自己还要努力啊