trees，bloodcherry:Esther.Li,circlezh,huangxiaoshan,abjure

abjureUID: 169591

我想问下:这样的文章够4分，我上次toefl作文只有3分。
我在后面争取每天一篇，至少两天一篇，时间不多了。我会尽量努力的。

bloodcherryUID: 9965

觉得句子有点混乱,而且有不少语法错误,并且,我个人感觉有点前言不搭后语,换言之,就是不能让人一眼看出你想说什么. p.s.我只改了一些你的语法问题
觉得你需要注意的应该是陈述的尽可能的简洁明了.还有,多注意起承转合的用词,以及多注意些同类词语替换.
In all fields and groups, there is a great deal of leaders who lead their groups to achieve dreams. Meanwhile, a question, still puzzle me for a long time is that the most important characteristic among leaders. The answer is likely to be honest, teamwork spirit, or managing ability. In my opinion, honest is the best choice among all candidate choices.

Firstly, honest help leaders to improve and push up the relationship of people, both strangers and friends. as a leader, he/she must make his/her group members work together in a nice relationship circumstance to avoid causing misunderstanding emotion. If he/she is thought to be honest person, he/she will easy to coordinate relationship in a group,because all people believe that he/she make a candid decision. On the other hand, leaders usually keep in touch with numerous strangers who come from other firms or groups. It is a common sense that an honest person is easily accepted by other people, so strangers would like to make new friends with a honest leaders.

Secondly, a responsible person can accomplish more outstanding jobs and surmount himself/herself. In fact, a person's success is attributed to do one more steps in working than other ones. If so, we have enough reasons to believe that responsibility would push people to walk one more steps toward successful orientation. For example, I am a leader in sales group and have similar experience. Because I had actively searched some products information for my customers. After that, my customers make quicker decision than before and help me achieve the goal of sell in that month. Thus I totally agree with the view that responsibility is a basic but significant element of a leader.

Thirdly, hardworking spirit plays increasingly considerable role in working. Actually, a good leader usually finishes more work than his/her usual crew, because the leader needs to show a lively example to usual crew. In this way, it is likely that leaders require other ones hardworking. On the contrary, neither is a leader hard working, nor owns positive working spirit, he/she is impossible to be a good leader.
  
In short, three basic element, honest, responsibility and hardworking become the most important characters of a leader.

[ Last edited by bloodcherry on 2005-5-2 at 00:19 ]

bloodcherryUID: 9965

sorry各位,我病了整整一个礼拜,才爬起来
呵呵，从现在开始到13号,我保证和各位兄弟共同进退
这些天,实在是辛苦吹丝MM了

circlezhUID: 186128

trees姐和抢滩哥，现在开始整理95-05的语法了，有问题就劳驾了，怕你一下看的太多太累了，先发一部分
9612na   4.DNA,_____ , is found in the cell nucleus in the form of very long and thin molecules consisting
of two spiral strands.
(A) inherits material
(B) is inheritance material
(C) material is inherited
(D) the material of inheritance
为啥选地不选艾啊
     10._____ , dolphins have no sense of smell.
(A) As known as far
(B) Known thus far as
(C) It is known as far
(D) As far as is known
这里As far as is known怎么分析，as is known作非限制性定语从句吗As far又是什么意思？
   26. During the 1940’s science and engineering had an impact on (the way )music (reach) its audience
and (even) influenced the way( in which) it was composed.
答案闭没问题，但on the way和 the way in which 同样是way为什么用了两种介词in &on都正确吗？
插问一个问题，名词做定语是不是只能用单数啊？
9608  11.        _____ around stones that are sun-warmed, even the smallest of stones creates tiny currents of warm air.
(A)        The cool air
(B)        If the air is cool
(C)        That the air cools
(D)        The cooler the air.
这题看不懂，感觉没谓语，even该是引导从句的吧
23.         (The )orangutan's hands and feet are designed (for) holding and grasping branches,                                                    
and its (powerful immensely) arms enable it to climb and swing in trees (without difficulty.)
答案c没问题，但有一个问题，可数名词不能单独存在的呀，但若和介词在一起是不是就不一定了啊？比如这里without difficulty和  by car之类的

[ Last edited by circlezh on 2005-5-2 at 10:45 ]

circlezhUID: 186128

9605     14.         Hiram Revels, the first Black member of the United States Senate, served as senator from Mississippi, an office _____ he was elected in 1870.
(A)         which
(B)         to which
(C)         and which
(D)         being which

为啥选闭 a这里的office是什么意思？an office _____ he was elected in 1870是做the United States Senate的同位语的吗？有electe sb.to +一个组织的用法吗？

30.         The central purpose of management is （for making） every action （or） decision help （achieve ）   a （carefully） chosen goal.
for making 为啥不对呢，非要用不定式吗？

9510  26.The （strength）, size, and surefootedness of the Hama（ make it） as （excellent） beast of burden in mountainous regions today （as） it was in the past.
答案是c怎么改，另外（ make it）大家觉得有问题吗，为啥不用单数？trees姐不是说单复要看and后面的词吗？

14.（        Established） about 1300, the Acoma pucblo in New Mexico （is believed） to（ be oldest ）continuously（ occupied） settlement in the United States.

选c没问题但Established about 1300是什么意思？

circlezhUID: 186128

9508
29. Designers of （athletic footwear） finely tune each （category of shoe ）to its（ particularly 0
                             A                                                                B                        C
activity by （studying） human motion and physiology.
                        D
选c没问题，可category of shoe， shoe 不用加s吗可数单数不能存在的呀

                     A                                  B                                                C
35. The purpose （of） traveler's checks （is） to protect travelers from （theft） and accidental
                     A                                  B                                                C
（lost） of money.

D
为啥选d单复问题吗？theft不用复数吗？


39. （The0 main （advertising） media include （direct mail,0 radio, television, magazine, and
        A                        B                                C
（newspaper.）
        D
这提做的我吐血，direct mail, radio, television, magazine,都可数的吧，不能单独存在的啊。相反newspaper.该是不可数的（我记得用a piece of newspaper的表达.）答案竟然把newspaper.）该成复数

9601
8.        No one knows exactly _____.
(A)        how did speech begin
(B)        how speech began
(C)        how the beginning of speech
(D)        of how beginning speech.
speech不用复数吗？

13.        _____ devised to lessen the drudgery of washing clothes that origin of the washing machine is unclear.
(A)        Were the inventions so numerous.
(B)        The inventions so numerous.
(C)        So numerous were the inventions.
(D)        The inventions that were so numerous.
难道numerous.做副词吗，不然句子就看不懂了。

29.        Over the past （few year）, many （towns） in the United States （have been joining） with neighboring
A                        B                                                        C
communities（ to share） the costs of government.

                                D
选a没问题，可不是说joining不能用完成时的吗，(记得参军几年了不能用have jiont而该说成 have been in army的）

Esther.LiUID: 191003

topic:工作中最重要的方面就是挣钱。你是否同意这一说法？请给出具体原因及实例来支持你的回答。   （26分钟写完）

Generally speaking, there is nothing wrong with the opinion that salary is one of the most fundamental aspects of a job. However, is it the most important one? As for me, the answer is negative due to ideas as follows.

To begin with, in spite of earning enough money to feed one and his or her family, there are much more things that outweigh money, such as the meaning of the job itself. As everyone knows, jobs that brings most money might belong to transporters and sellers of drugs, which have ruined tens of thousands people's families and demolished their lives easily, causing uncountable miserable stories. Are they good jobs? Definitely not. Everyone spits them for the evil consequences they make. On the contrary, people revere a teacher in a kindergarten, thouch she or he may earn relatively little money.

Secondly, a sense of fulfillment is of great significance. As for me, a college student, I always dream of becoming a researcher on science to study, invent and develop new theories or new mwthods, regardliss of how much I will be paid. In actual fact, the most important aspect at this time lies no longer in the money I will get, but how many difficulties I could conquer, and how many goals I could reach. The sense of fulfillment will satisfy me and spur me to du further jobs without feeling tied.

Considering the reasons mentioned above, I do not take money as the most important aspect of a job, though it is undoubtedly the most fundamental one. What I think outweigh money are the meaning of the job, a sense of fulfillment you get in the job, and the happiness and reverence it brings to you.


写完之后才觉得好多想表达的分论点还没有说出来，可是没有时间了，似乎以后写之前构思的时候应该注意分论点的选择和取舍。
trees姐姐看看这次没有跑题吧？

还有，修改的时候可能擦的空和要写的空不一样大，怎么办呢？如果空大了就空着，不够用就用插入符号么？老外认识插入符号么？

还有，“从某种程度来说”和“从某种意义来说”分别怎么表达呢？:p

[ Last edited by Esther.Li on 2005-5-2 at 22:23 ]

bloodcherryUID: 9965

这个小兄弟，我也是女生啊:L:L

Originally posted by circlezh at 2005-5-2 10:20
9612na   4.DNA,_____ , is found in the cell nucleus in the form of very long and thin molecules consisting
of two spiral strands.
(A) inherits material
(B) is inheritance material
(C) material is inherited
(D) the material of inheritance
为啥选地不选艾啊
XX,___,XXXX这样的格式，都是选同位语,根据句子后面的谓语,is,可以证明这里的同位语必须是个单数.所以D正确
     10._____ , dolphins have no sense of smell.
(A) As known as far
(B) Known thus far as
(C) It is known as far
(D) As far as is known
这里As far as is known怎么分析，as is known作非限制性定语从句吗As far又是什么意思？
as far as is known是个固定搭配，众所周知的意思
   26. During the 1940’s science and engineering had an impact on (the way )music (reach) its audience and (even) influenced the way( in which) it was composed.
答案闭没问题，但on the way和 the way in which 同样是way为什么用了两种介词in &on都正确吗？
插问一个问题，名词做定语是不是只能用单数啊？
两个the way在这里并不是一样的用法,第一个on the way是在什么路上,什么过程中的意思,而第二个the way是定语从句的先行词

23.         (The )orangutan's hands and feet are designed (for) holding and grasping branches,  and its (powerful immensely) arms enable it to climb and swing in trees (without difficulty.)
答案c没问题，但有一个问题，可数名词不能单独存在的呀，但若和介词在一起是不是就不一定了啊？比如这里without difficulty和  by car之类的

without difficulty 在这里是没有任何困难的意思,我不是很明白你的意思,啥叫可数名词不能单独存在呢?:o

bloodcherryUID: 9965

Originally posted by circlezh at 2005-5-2 10:51
9605     14.         Hiram Revels, the first Black member of the United States Senate, served as senator from Mississippi, an office _____ he was elected in 1870.
(A)         which
(B)         to which
(C)         and which
(D)         being which

为啥选闭 a这里的office是什么意思？an office _____ he was elected in 1870是做the United States Senate的同位语的吗？有electe sb.to +一个组织的用法吗？
这里的office实际上是表示地点的一个先行词,所以光用which是不对的,必须在which前面加上一个介词来完成整个意思.elect sb.to 推选某人到某岗位

30.         The central purpose of management is （for making） every action （or） decision help （achieve ）   a （carefully） chosen goal.
for making 为啥不对呢，非要用不定式吗？
是的，在这里表目的必须要用to make



14.（        Established） about 1300, the Acoma pucblo in New Mexico （is believed） to（ be oldest ）continuously（ occupied） settlement in the United States.

选c没问题但Established about 1300是什么意思
大约在1300年建立

[ Last edited by bloodcherry on 2005-5-2 at 22:05 ]

abjureUID: 169591

blood cherry 呵呵：我一开始也以为你是男生阿！抢摊大上海，我一开始把你和《上海滩》联系起来了。
EXERCISE TWO
35 In the United States, the Cabinet [consist] of a [group of] advisers, [each of whom ]is [chosen] by the President to head an
executive department of the government.
答案选A，我明白，为什么c用whom 而不是用who， 不是做后面分句的成分决定关系代词嘛，是主语阿？

哪里可以找到比较标准00－04听力答案？我手头这份答案不全。

abjureUID: 169591

Exercise fourteen
32 In 【the field of】 acting theory, controversy 【arises over】 the question of whether 【is acting】 a behavioral or【 a mental process】.
答案选C，怎么改，为什么？

abjureUID: 169591

谢谢bloodcherry的批改。我把那篇文章几乎重新写过了。
Topic：什么是一个领导者最重要的品质！
Leadership
这篇文章我大改了一次。包括强化了开头，以及集中些honest对leader的好处。
第二段 ：honest可以让人更好工作
第三段：honest可以改进人际关系
第四段：自己也没有思路：

In the era of rapid social change, leaders are confronted with and haunted by the issue weather people are capable of picking out the most important character of successful leaders. Different people have different views about the issue, but I especially support the view that honest is the most significant one in numerous choices.

Firstly, a good leader usually finishes up his/her jobs in time. In fact, an honest character help leader accomplish more outstanding work. For example, when I am a leader of a sales group, I hardly achieved the sales goal timely in a month because the whole department’s profit was declining. However, I finally reach the sale goal because a small promise to one customer, helping customers to seek for some added production information, was achieved. After that, that customer made quicker decision than before and help me achieve the goal of sell in that month. Thus I totally agree with the view that honest trait is a basic but significant element of a leader.

Secondly, the duties of leader are that not only complete one person’s workload, but also improve relationship among people. As a common sense, people relationship roots in trust. Furthermore the trust is based on honest character, because it helps leaders to improve and push up the relationship of people, including strangers and friends.  For instance, as a leader, he/she must make members work together in a nice relationship circumstance to avoid causing misunderstanding emotion. If the leader is thought to be an honest person, he/she will easy to coordinate relationship in a group, because all people think that he/she would make a candid decision.

Thirdly, 第三段我想不到正直对于Leader还有其他的好处的，大家有没有建议？假如考试遇到这种情况我该怎么办？
  
In short, Leader's oustanding work and relationship greatly attribute to honest, so I consider honest trait as the most important character for a leader. （结尾自己这里好像只是极其简单的一个重复原文的几个词，两位姐姐一般是怎么展开？）

[ Last edited by abjure on 2005-5-3 at 00:53 ]

treesUID: 82785

23.         (The )orangutan's hands and feet are designed (for) holding and grasping branches,  and its (powerful immensely) arms enable it to climb and swing in trees (without difficulty.)
答案c没问题，但有一个问题，可数名词不能单独存在的呀，但若和介词在一起是不是就不一定了啊？比如这里without difficulty和  by car之类的

单数名词不能裸体是对的。BY CAR这种是固定搭配，表示行进方式的。WITHOUT DIFFICULTY 中DIFFICULTY也可以做不可数名词。可以查查字典：）

35 In the United States, the Cabinet [consist] of a [group of] advisers, [each of whom ]is [chosen] by the President to head an
executive department of the government.
答案选A，我明白，为什么c用whom 而不是用who， 不是做后面分句的成分决定关系代词嘛，是主语阿？
没有each of who的用法


00-04精华区有



Exercise fourteen
32 In 【the field of】 acting theory, controversy 【arises over】 the question of whether 【is acting】 a behavioral or【 a mental process】.
答案选C，怎么改，为什么？  

去掉IS，前边有动词了，后边虽然后WHETHER但是是OF WHETHER所以不能跟句子

treesUID: 82785

Firstly, a good leader usually finishes up his/her jobs in time. In fact, an honest character help leader accomplish more outstanding work. For example, when I am a leader of a sales group, I hardly achieved the sales goal timely in a month because the whole department’s profit was declining. However, I finally reach the sale goal because a small promise to one customer, helping customers to seek for some added production information, was achieved. After that, that customer made quicker decision than before and help me achieve the goal of sell in that month. Thus I totally agree with the view that honest trait is a basic but significant element of a leader.

不客气了哈。这段的例子有问题，你怎么解决的问题以达到了销售目标并不能证明诚信哪里重要。

其实准确的说应该是分论点的错误，从逻辑上讲，并不使因为LEADER守时，所以诚信重要。这里没有明确的逻辑关系的。可以选一个论点，诚信可以使LEADER获得更大的利益，比如手下发货，不合格，LEADER自愿承担损失主要要求退货，这样客户信赖，下次还来

treesUID: 82785

第2段没问题，正直可以取信于人

结尾一般不用想的特别花哨。跟开头不一样的点睛即可，建议用不超过2句，你的结构还好