Issue94 还有11天了，麻烦大家给拍拍吧~~~

蝴蝶结UID: 195566

Issue94:
Universities should require every student to take a variety of courses outside the student's field of study because acquiring knowledge of various academic disciplines is the best way to become truly educated.

—正文—
As the globalized society needs more and more complex people, I unassailably agree that university students should be required to take a variety of courses outside their field of study. But whether this is the best way for them to become truly educated? In my view, I recommend that the ability to solve practical problems by using the various knowledge students learned is equally significant.

As a threshold, acquiring a variety of courses outside the particular field of study helps improving the specialty. Take Leonardo De Vinci as an example. As an outstanding artist and scientist at the same time, De Vinci in Renaissance Italy left us a large number of precious works in which bodies’ proportion was portrayed perfectly which, had to be attributed to his profound understanding of the structure of human body. Therefore, because many subjects have the correlation with each other, and can even promote with each other, different courses outside the major subjects should be necessarily required for university students to take for the sake of solidifying their own specialty.

Adding further credibility to the statement is that now we are living in such a globalized world that more generalists rather than specialists are required. For instance, a company would prefer the very applicant who has both good knowledge of his or her field and capacity of using English and computer well. Besides, if he or she has a driving license either, there is no better choice for that firm than accept this so-called complex person. The reason is obvious, since this generalist could work much more independently and efficiently, thus much endeavor, including time, expense, labor and so forth, can be saved for other aspects for the company. Simply put, being a generalist does really good for university students to have a brighter future in the contemporary modern time.  

However, merely thorough knowledge is insufficient for a college student facing the highly competitive society to be truly educated unless he or she has practical ability as well. In China, so many high-scored university students find them difficult to well accomplish their work. That is because universities only place emphasis on book learning in the past. Fortunately, this situation has been changed actively and greatly. On the contrary, students in the US universities almost have one to two years spending themselves as interns in companies, factories etc. Recently, groups of American undergraduates are even sent to China to get more experience in diverse work environments. In short, work capacity cannot be substituted by book knowledge for universities to call for their students to acquire.

To sum up, without a variety of courses outside the particular subjects, students could not develop their own majors well. What is more, practical ability is equally necessary for every student in colleges facing entering the globalized and competitive society.

[ Last edited by staralways on 2005-7-16 at 19:05 ]

songwei1765UID: 202658

Issue94:
Universities should require every student to take a variety of courses outside the student's field of study because acquiring knowledge of various academic disciplines is the best way to become truly educated.

As the globalized society[这样用行吗？全球化的社会？] needs more and more complex people[你是想说复合型人才吧？呵呵，composite human resources], I unassailably agree that university students[貌似都是college students的说] should be required to take a variety of courses outside their field of study. But whether this is the best way for them to become truly educated? In my view, I recommend that the ability to solve practical problems by using the various knowledge students learned is equally significant.[最后一句有点中式] [开头有试图不落入俗套的尝试，但实质性的提出观点也就最后一句，前面有些句子没太多意义。]

As a threshold, acquiring a variety of courses outside the particular field of study helps improving the specialty. Take Leonardo De Vinci as an example. As an outstanding artist and scientist at the same time, De Vinci in Renaissance Italy left us a large number of precious works in which bodies’ proportion was portrayed perfectly which, had to be attributed to his profound understanding of the structure of human body. Therefore, because many subjects have the correlation with each other, and can even promote with each other, different courses outside the major subjects should be necessarily required for university students to take for the sake of solidifying their own specialty.[老问题，刚说了一句就来例子，感觉有点空]

Adding further credibility to the statement is that now we are living in such a globalized world that more generalists rather than specialists are required[从句为啥用被动？有问题]. For instance, a company would prefer the very applicant who has both good knowledge of his or her field and capacity of using English and computer well. Besides, if he or she has a driving license either, there is no better choice for that firm than accept this so-called complex person. The reason is obvious, since this generalist could work much more independently and efficiently, thus much endeavor, including time, expense, labor and so forth, can be saved for other aspects for the company. Simply put, being a generalist does really good for university students to have a brighter future in the contemporary modern time.  [语言问题不多谈了，同开头差不多，有不小的中式痕迹，要改进。这段好点，论证稍微充分一些，但还是要把握住题意，真正把题目中best way to be truly educated与你谈的社会要求联系起来。]

However, merely thorough knowledge is insufficient for a college student facing the highly competitive society to be truly educated unless he or she has practical ability as well. In China, so many high-scored university students find them difficult to well accomplish their work. That is because universities only place emphasis on book learning in the past. Fortunately, this situation has been changed actively and greatly. On the contrary, students in the US universities almost have one to two years spending themselves as interns in companies, factories etc. Recently, groups of American undergraduates are even sent to China to get more experience in diverse work environments.[偶在举例的时候不习惯拿自己国家的不足同别的国家的优势来比，ETS也在官方指南上提到过希望考生不要轻视自己的国家。说实话，这里感觉有点拍马的味道。] In short, work capacity cannot be substituted by book knowledge for universities to call for their students to acquire.[一样的问题，举个例子得个结论，这样的论证是不够充分的。]

To sum up, without a variety of courses outside the particular subjects, students could not develop their own majors well. What is more, practical ability is equally necessary for every student in colleges facing entering the globalized and competitive society.

[加油，主要就是提到的那个问题。多看看精华区中的优秀习作，看看他们是怎么论证的~]

Lyon_TonyUID: 178961

Issue94:
Universities should require every student to take a variety of courses outside the student's field of study because acquiring knowledge of various academic disciplines is the best way to become truly educated.

—正文—
As the globalized society needs more and more complex people, I unassailably 很新颖的用法，可是不知道对不对 agree that university students should be required to take a variety of courses outside their field of study. But whether this is the best way for them to become truly educated? In my view, I recommend that the ability to solve practical problems by using the various knowledge students learned is equally significant.没得说

As a threshold, acquiring a variety of courses outside the particular field of study helps improving the specialty. professional skill Take Leonardo De Vinci as an example. As an outstanding artist and scientist at the same time, De Vinci in Renaissance Italy left us a large number of precious works in which bodies’ proportion was portrayed perfectly， which, had to be attributed to his profound understanding of the structure of human body. Therefore, because many subjects have the correlation with each other, and can even promote with each other, different courses outside the major subjects should be necessarily required for university students to take for the sake of solidifying their own specialty.
我觉得达芬奇例子举的不好，你可以说他的画用到了几何学等等的知识，可是人体学。。。自己考虑一下

Adding further credibility to the statement is that now we are living in such a globalized world that more generalists rather than specialists are required. For instance, a company would prefer the very applicant who has both good knowledge of his or her field and capacity of using English and computer well. Besides, if he or she has a driving license either, there is no better choice for that firm than accept this so-called complex person. 这个不一定吧，虽然在中国是这样，可别忘了美国人都会English，几乎都会DIRIVE The reason is obvious, since this generalist could work much more independently and efficiently, thus much endeavor, including time, expense, labor and so forth, can be saved for other aspects for the company. Simply put, being a generalist does really good for university students to have a brighter future in the contemporary modern time.  不错，要全才

However, merely thorough knowledge is insufficient for a college student facing the highly competitive society to be truly educated unless he or she has practical ability as well. In China, so many high-scored university students find them difficult to well accomplish their work. That is because universities only place emphasis on book learning in the past. Fortunately, this situation has been changed actively and greatly. On the contrary, students in the US universities almost have one to two years spending themselves as interns in companies, factories etc. Recently, groups of American undergraduates are even sent to China to get more experience in diverse work environments. In short, work capacity cannot be substituted by book knowledge for universities to call for their students to acquire.最后一句话有点失彩，总结得不好
To sum up, without a variety of courses outside the particular subjects, students could not develop their own majors well. What is more, practical ability is equally necessary for every student in colleges facing entering the globalized and competitive society.

总体感觉很不错，语句流畅，观点鲜明，

但是要考虑其中的例子的恰当应用

加油啊~~蝴蝶结

蝴蝶结UID: 195566

谢谢大家，fighting~~~