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[i习作temp] issue11 89互助营--限时字数开始多起来了 [复制链接]

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发表于 2005-7-19 13:02:08 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
最高频题目写作告一段落,今天开始进入超高频题目写作。可能是这些题目比较友好,这两天竟然限时能写到480多字了。信心大增啊。请互助营战友将自己的习作链接留下,我回拍!

Issue11:
All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems.

提纲:
2。全球问题已非一个国家能够解决,需要国际合作。世界大学是一种合作方法。
3。世界大学集中最优秀的资源,问题解决效果好
4。世界大学不具有国家利益冲突,多元文化更容易被理解和尊重,能够产生被大多数国家接受的解决方案。
5。然而,要警惕世界大学不被个别国家操纵和利用。


Is it necessary for all nations to support to establish a global university designed to solve the world's most serious social problems? As for me, I strongly agree with the speaker to support this idea for the reason that it provides another feasible alternative solution to tackle most serious social problems of the world.

To begin with, with the increasing trend of globalization and interdependency of all nations, it becomes an "impossible mission" for a single nation to solve world social problems. Nowadays it is conspicuous to observe that almost all world social problems have the characteristic of globalization trend. Existing nuclear weapons in limited countries can destroy the earth thousands of time. The deforestation in Brazil will lead to dramatic environmental destruction which hazards the fragile bio-sphere and global climate. Civil war in one nation will cause refugee flooding into neighboring nations and even kindle regional or world war. There is no doubt that world social problems gradually go beyond control of sole nation thus need efficient and proactive cooperation among all nations. Many international organizations such as UN, WHO, Red Cross and etc have been established accordingly to solve different global problems. If a global university can be built up, it will be another advisable solution to study and solve serious global problems.

Moreover, I believe global university could be another efficient organization to study and solve the world's most persistent social problems. If this project can be supported by many nations, it will be very efficient to accumulate the best experts in relevant study fields and the most promising students from every nation. More elite take time and resources to study those world social problems and engage in the solution development in special groups, more feasible solutions will be developed to tackle world pressing social problems.

Furthermore, global university creates a sound academic atmosphere in which all cultures in the world gain understanding and respects and in hence facilitate the development of solutions welcomed by all nations. World cultures are so diversified that it easily leads to misunderstanding and contradiction when solving international problems. Different national interest is another factor impeding the cooperation. Take UN for example, due to the different culture background, interests and concerns of individual nation or groups, disputes and disapproval always occur when solving world problems such as weapons limitation and environment protection. While this may not happen in global university because it is easy for all students and professors from different countries to share their ideas and better understand other culture. This understanding and respect will facilitate them to develop a more impartial and friendly solution which is easily accepted by most nations.

However, to make sure the global university goes smoothly and efficiently, we need to prevent some nations from intervening in the university operation and make advantage of study process. The university must be independent or it will become political tool or serve as spokesperson for certain nations.

In sum, a global university will work as another efficient international cooperation organization to solve the most pressing social problems in the world. With top experts and excellent students, and with mutual understanding and respect in multi-cultures, independent global university has its unique advantages to develop feasible solutions for world social problems.

[ Last edited by staralways on 2005-7-20 at 12:42 ]
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发表于 2005-7-20 00:17:37 |只看该作者
呵呵,来了
这篇我大前天写过哦
不过因为自己没有修改就没贴
先占个座,明天帮你看,然后也贴上我的,交流一下。
挑战10/22!

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发表于 2005-7-20 00:22:45 |只看该作者
第二段我要改改。我可能对world social problem理解有误。我想核武器和环境问题应该不属于全球性的社会问题吧?我得改成毒品、贫穷和AIDS问题。另:恐怖主义算什么?属于全球性的社会问题吗?
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发表于 2005-7-20 12:49:44 |只看该作者
Issue11:
All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems.

提纲:
2。全球问题已非一个国家能够解决,需要国际合作。世界大学是一种合作方法。
3。世界大学集中最优秀的资源,问题解决效果好
4。世界大学不具有国家利益冲突,多元文化更容易被理解和尊重,能够产生被大多数国家接受的解决方案。
5。然而,要警惕世界大学不被个别国家操纵和利用。


Is it necessary for all nations to support to establish a global university designed to solve the world's most serious social problems? As for me, I strongly agree with the speaker (to support this idea)重复,建议删掉 for the reason that it provides another feasible alternative solution to tackle most serious social problems of the world.

To begin with, with the increasing increased trend of globalization and interdependency of all nations, it becomes an "impossible mission" for a single nation to solve world social problems. Nowadays it is conspicuous to observe that almost all world social problems have the characteristic of globalization trend. Existing nuclear weapons in limited countries can destroy the earth thousands of time times. The deforestation in Brazil will lead to dramatic environmental destruction which hazards the fragile bio-sphere and global climate. Civil war in one nation will cause refugee flooding into neighboring nations and even kindle regional or world war. There is no doubt that world social problems gradually go beyond control of sole nation thus need efficient and proactive cooperation among all nations. Many international organizations such as UN, WHO, Red Cross and etc have been established accordingly to solve different global problems. If a global university can be built up, it will be another advisable solution (to study and solve serious global problems).前面已经说了,这里不妨删掉

Moreover, I believe global university could be another efficient organization to study and solve the world's most persistent social problems.这句ts觉得不好,重复好多遍了,要不用个not only but承上启下一下,也可以突出efficient?sigh…没有想出更好的句子 If this project can be supported by many nations, it will be very efficient to accumulate the best experts in relevant study fields and the most promising students from every nation. More elite take time and resources to study those world social problems and (engage in the solution development in special groups)这句什么意思啊?, more feasible solutions will be developed to tackle world pressing social problems.

Furthermore, global university creates a sound academic atmosphere in which all cultures in the world gain understanding and respects and in hence in hence?可以的吗? facilitate the development of solutions welcomed by all nations. World cultures are so diversified that it they easily leads lead to misunderstanding and contradiction when solving international problems. Different national interest is another factor impeding the cooperation. Take UN for example, due to the different culture background cultural backgrounds, interests and concerns of individual nation or groups, disputes and disapproval always occur when solving world problems such as weapons limitation and environment environmental protection. While this may not happen in global university because it is easy for all students and professors from different countries to share their ideas and better understand other culture 复数. This understanding and respect will facilitate them to develop a more impartial and friendly solution which is easily accepted by most nations.

However, to make sure the global university goes smoothly and efficiently, we need to prevent some nations from intervening in the university operation and make making advantage of study process. The university must be independent or it will become a political tool or serve as spokesperson for certain nations.

In sum, a global university will work as another efficient international cooperation organization to solve the most pressing social problems in the world. With top experts and excellent students, and with mutual understanding and respect in multi-cultures, independent global university has its unique advantages to develop feasible solutions for world social problems.

我拼命拼命挑错,真的好像没什么逻辑错误,总能说得过去。语言上有一点罗索,再来就是小毛病了。限时写的,很不错了。加油!
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发表于 2005-7-20 12:59:48 |只看该作者
我可能对world social problem理解有误。我想核武器和环境问题应该不属于全球性的社会问题吧?我得改成毒品、贫穷和AIDS问题。另:恐怖主义算什么?属于全球性的社会问题吗?

恐怖主义,环境问题当然是全球性问题啦
核武器不确定
这个,不用太较真把?
挑战10/22!

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发表于 2005-7-20 13:02:04 |只看该作者
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=303025
这是我的issue11,帮我看看吧~~谢谢哦:)
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发表于 2005-7-20 19:00:58 |只看该作者

给你发邮件了

这两天没来得及改你的作文,明天一定改。
另外,你们开始上argu了吗?
argument50实在是个棘手的题目。

你有什么高见?或者正好可以上课问问老师。

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发表于 2005-7-20 23:50:53 |只看该作者
还是修锐的issue,没什么实质性的收获,觉得时间浪费得可惜。真希望能多点时间写作文。。。后悔应该把作文考试再往后搁几天就好了。。。

argument50的看看,如果真的很难,等上argument课我问老师去。
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发表于 2005-7-21 10:09:12 |只看该作者
我来占位咯~

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发表于 2005-7-23 12:54:47 |只看该作者
Is it necessary for all nations to support to establish a global university designed to solve the world's most serious social problems? [呵呵~好象你真的很喜欢用问句开头] As for me, I strongly agree with the speaker to support this idea [多余] for the reason that it provides another feasible alternative solution to tackle most serious social problems of the world.

To begin with, with the increasing trend of globalization and interdependency of all nations, it becomes an "impossible mission" for a single nation to solve world social problems. Nowadays it is conspicuous to observe that almost all world social problems have the characteristic of globalization trend. Existing nuclear weapons in limited countries can destroy the earth thousands of time. [这个是world social problems?值得商榷] The deforestation in Brazil will lead to dramatic environmental destruction which hazards the fragile bio-sphere and global climate. Civil war in one nation will cause refugee flooding into neighboring nations and even kindle regional or world war. There is no doubt that world social problems gradually go beyond control of sole nation thus need efficient and proactive cooperation among all nations. Many international organizations such as UN, WHO, Red Cross and etc have been established accordingly to solve different global problems. If a global university can be built up, it will be another advisable solution to study and solve serious global problems. [这一段例子举得不错啊~但是例子和TS之间有一段距离,不是说你离题~需要过度]

Moreover, I believe global university could be another efficient organization to study and solve the world's most persistent social problems. If this project can be supported by many nations, it will be very efficient to accumulate the best experts in relevant study fields and the most promising students from every nation. More elite take time and resources to study those world social problems and engage in the solution development in special groups, more feasible solutions will be developed to tackle world pressing social problems. [不错啊~我就没有怎么写SCHOOL的作用~还是XD你想得全啊~]

Furthermore, global university creates a sound academic atmosphere in which all cultures in the world gain understanding and respects and in hence facilitate the development of solutions welcomed by all nations. World cultures are so diversified that it easily leads to misunderstanding and contradiction when solving international problems. Different national interest is another factor impeding the cooperation. Take UN for example, due to the different culture background, interests and concerns of individual nation or groups, disputes and disapproval always occur when solving world problems such as weapons limitation and environment protection. While this may not happen in global university because it is easy for all students and professors from different countries to share their ideas and better understand other culture. This understanding and respect will facilitate them to develop a more impartial and friendly solution which is easily accepted by most nations. [哈哈~UN的例子的确非常到位,厉害啊!]

However, to make sure the global university goes smoothly and efficiently, we need to prevent some nations from intervening in the university operation and make advantage of study process. The university must be independent or it will become political tool or serve as spokesperson for certain nations.

In sum, a global university will work as another efficient international cooperation organization to solve the most pressing social problems in the world. With top experts and excellent students, and with mutual understanding and respect in multi-cultures, independent global university has its unique advantages to develop feasible solutions for world social problems.

这是一篇5分范文~论证方面十分严密,语言流畅,结构清晰,而且例子恰倒好处。厉害啊~XD你的逻辑无懈可击,而且又全面。不象我,盯着一点狂写,字数是上去了,但有些偏颇,容易离题。还是得向学习啊!这是我本月最后一次来GTER了,也最后一次改你的文章了。还一个星期就考了,我会集中总复习,不会再上网了。以后XD你的帖子我就无能为力了,对不起啦!!!
不过我8。1考完了还会上网,告诉你我的经验跟我考的题目啊。再帮你改改你的文章。我们一起度过难关!
我的文章就不用再麻烦你了。希望考完AW我们还能一起并肩对抗笔试!!真希望以后能异地相见SUCH AS 米国的某个CAFE~哈哈~爱幻想的毛病又来了~
说实话,还真有点紧张啊!
祝我好运吧~高频~希望是你!!
你也加油啊!!加油!!
GOOD LUCK TO US!GOD BLESS US!

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发表于 2005-7-23 17:08:59 |只看该作者
Issue11:
All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems.

Is it necessary for all nations to support to establish a global university designed to solve the world's most serious social problems? As for me, I strongly agree with the speaker to support this idea for the reason that it provides another feasible alternative solution to tackle most serious social problems of the world.

To begin with, with the increasing trend of globalization and interdependency of all nations, it becomes an "impossible mission" for a single nation to solve world social problems. Nowadays it is conspicuous to observe that almost all world social problems have the characteristic of globalization trend. Existing nuclear weapons in limited countries can destroy the earth thousands of time. The deforestation in Brazil will lead to dramatic environmental destruction which hazards the fragile bio-sphere and global climate. Civil war in one nation will cause refugee flooding into neighboring nations and even kindle regional or world war. There is no doubt that world social problems gradually go beyond control of sole nation thus need efficient and proactive cooperation among all nations. Many international organizations such as UN, WHO, Red Cross and etc have been established accordingly to solve different global problems. If a global university can be built up, it will be another advisable solution to study and solve serious global problems. [条理异常清晰]

Moreover, I believe global university could be another efficient organization to study and solve the world's most persistent social problems. If this project can be supported by many nations, it will be very efficient to accumulate the best experts in relevant study fields and the most promising students from every nation. More elite take time and resources to study those world social problems and engage in the solution development in special groups, more feasible solutions will be developed to tackle world pressing social problems.

Furthermore, global university creates a sound academic atmosphere in which all cultures in the world gain understanding and respects[原因与其说是所有文化受到理解和尊敬还不如说是给不同文化营造了一个互相沟通协调的桥梁] and in hence facilitate the development of solutions welcomed by all nations. World cultures are so diversified that it easily leads to misunderstanding and contradiction when solving international problems. Different national interest is another factor impeding the cooperation. Take UN for example, due to the different culture background, interests and concerns of individual nation or groups, disputes and disapproval always occur when solving world problems such as weapons limitation and environment protection. While this may not happen in global university because it is easy for all students and professors from different countries to share their ideas and better understand other culture.[这段没有论证清楚,为什么在世界大学里会比较容易share ideas among people from different contries,或者为什么能够gain understanding and respects] This understanding and respect will facilitate them to develop a more impartial and friendly solution which is easily accepted by most nations. [本段观点说的是在世界大学里探讨社会问题解决方案时文化无隔阂,我觉得还不如说世界大学能够通过研究消除解决社会问题时的文化隔阂,毕竟大学本身是不能消除文化隔阂的]

However, to make sure the global university goes smoothly and efficiently, we need to prevent some nations from intervening in the university operation and make [take] advantage of study process. The university must be independent or it will become political tool or serve as spokesperson for certain nations.

In sum, a global university will work as another efficient international cooperation organization to solve the most pressing social problems in the world. With top experts and excellent students, and with mutual understanding and respect in multi-cultures, independent global university has its unique advantages to develop feasible solutions for world social problems.

总体上逻辑,结构,语言都没有大问题,就是第三个论点与楼主有些分歧,限时条件下能写成这样已经相当好了
8.3 上海

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发表于 2005-7-26 20:14:19 |只看该作者
Is it necessary for all nations to support to establish a global university designed to solve the world's most serious social problems? As for me, I strongly agree with the speaker to support this idea for the reason that it provides another feasible alternative solution to tackle most serious social problems of the world.

To begin with, with the increasing trend of globalization and interdependency of all nations, it becomes an "impossible mission" for a single nation to solve world social problems. Nowadays it is conspicuous to observe that almost all world social problems have the characteristic of globalization trend. Existing nuclear weapons in limited countries can destroy the earth thousands of time. The deforestation in Brazil will lead to dramatic environmental destruction which hazards the fragile bio-sphere and global climate. Civil war in one nation will cause refugee flooding into neighboring nations and even kindle regional or world war. There is no doubt that world social problems gradually go beyond control of sole nation thus need efficient and proactive cooperation among all nations. Many international organizations such as UN, WHO, Red Cross and etc have been established accordingly to solve different global problems. If a global university can be built up, it will be another advisable solution to study and solve serious global problems. (其实这段例子虽然多但是都没有说透。而且你之所以怀疑nuclear weapon是不是全球化的问题,是因为在这段分析中,你没有说出来它为什么成为一个需要全球合作解决的问题。即使以前,没有全球化,也还是一个原子弹能把地球炸毁无数次啊。所以在你的例子和观点之间,还差了一层解释。更重要的是,这一段写到最后才扣了一下题,似乎不是太好)

Moreover, I believe global university could be another efficient organization to study and solve the world's most persistent social problems. If this project can be supported by many nations, it will be very efficient to accumulate the best experts in relevant study fields and the most promising students from every nation. More elite take time and resources to study those world social problems and engage in the solution development in special groups, more feasible solutions will be developed to tackle world pressing social problems.

Furthermore, global university creates a sound academic atmosphere in which all cultures in the world gain understanding and respects,and in hence facilitate the development of solutions welcomed by all nations. World cultures are so diversified that it easily leads to misunderstanding and contradiction when solving international problems. Different national interest is another factor impeding the cooperation. Take UN for example, due to the different culture background, interests and concerns of individual nation or groups, disputes and disapproval always occur when solving world problems such as weapons limitation and environment protection. While this may not happen in global university because it is easy for all students and professors from different countries to share their ideas and better understand other culture share ideas among people from different contries,gain understanding and respects] This understanding and respect will facilitate them to develop a more impartial and friendly solution which is easily accepted by most nations.

However, to make sure the global university goes smoothly and efficiently, we need to prevent some nations from intervening in the university operation and make [take] advantage of study process. The university must be independent or it will become political tool or serve as spokesperson for certain nations.

In sum, a global university will work as another efficient international cooperation organization to solve the most pressing social problems in the world. With top experts and excellent students, and with mutual understanding and respect in multi-cultures, independent global university has its unique advantages to develop feasible solutions for world social problems.(整个看完的感觉就是语言很流畅,内容也很丰富,但是逻辑层次反倒没有你有些短文章清楚。我有时候也会犯这个毛病,就是遇到自己熟悉的话题,有很多句子可以说的时候,反倒忽略了逻辑的深度。改了很久也不知道从哪里下刀,觉得哪都好,哪又都有点多余,整个文章不利索。可能是我自己也没有想清楚这个问题吧,我想想再跟你进一步交流)

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RE: issue11 89互助营--限时字数开始多起来了 [修改]

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