issue48 超时的说，唉

claymanUID: 2102470

0510G同主题写作第五期－－Issue48

"The study of history places too much emphasis on individuals. The most significant events and trends in history were made possible not by the famous few, but by groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten."
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History is constituted by stories of both great individuals and common groups of people. There are reasons that the study of history focus on individuals, but it unfair to ignore the importance of those civilians whose identities have long been forgotten as it is the little who make historic events symbolized by the name of the famous possible.

The lack of information of history could be a critical reason for the phenomenon that individuals are studied so much by historians. Not until the invention of paper, it is such a hard task to keep a memory of the past for humans. Our ancestors find many ways to keep their archive. At first, epics were sang by bards across the country; latter, words are carved on rock, bamboo or whatever seems to help keep the information longer. Even after the invention of printing, reading and writing is still a privilege for autocrats in a quite long period. In this situation, the precious record can be used for nobody but kings, generals, monks—the minority but powerful group of people. After thousands of years when historians want to take a look at the past, they inevitable keep their eye on individuals who have a creditable record other than those nameless humble man.

Another reason for the phenomenon will be ascribed to the complexity of history events, especially social events that were participated by almost any one living in the era when the events happened. The thought that the study of history should examine those involved in certain event one by one can only confuse the historian rather than clarify the truth. As the great individual was selected as leader or symbol of a event and participated in it directly, it is reasonable to assert that this individual is on behalf of those quietly stand behind supporting him or her, and a careful study of this person will give us a vivid picture of how the event happened meanwhile some interesting subtle factors that have accelerated or delayed the story will also be revealed.

By the end, the fundamental functions of the civilians have been acknowledged and will be better studied by future historians. Karl Marx had pointed out that the ordinary people made history possible and heroes only accelerated it by following their needs. No matter how eager Lincoln is to emancipate slaves, he can not make it in ancient Roman but only when people want to free them thousands of years latter. And no matter how intelligent Einstein was born, he would only think about how to catch a tiger if he is born 5 thousand years before Newton. The situation may improve as the human civilization become more sophisticated, more personal information can be remained for even normal person and make it possible for future historians to reevaluate the ordinary based on these data.

To sum up,  the focus on the great is reasonable due to lack of information and the situation is going to improve in the future as the development of information technology. All these ideas should be rooted in the general conception that it is the common people who make history possible and the key individual is great for their courage and effort to serve them.

星星之火UID: 2107154

issue48 超时的说，唉

0510G同主题写作第五期－－Issue48

"The study of history places too much emphasis on individuals. The most significant events and trends in history were made possible not by the famous few, but by groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten."
―――――――――――――
History is constituted by stories of both great individuals and common groups of people. There are reasons that(why) the study of history focus on individuals, but it (is) unfair to ignore the importance of those civilians whose identities have long been forgotten as it is the little who make historic events symbolized by the name of the famous possible.(最后这句看着有点费劲)
The lack of information of history could be a critical reason for the phenomenon that individuals are studied so much by historians. Not until the invention of paper, it is (要倒装)such a hard task to keep a memory of the past for humans. Our ancestors find many ways to keep their archive. At first, epics were sang by bards across the country; latter, words are carved on rock, bamboo or whatever seems to help keep the information longer. Even after the invention of printing, reading and writing is still a privilege for autocrats in a quite long period. In this situation, the precious record can be used for nobody but kings, generals, monks—the minority but powerful group of people. After thousands of years when historians want to take a look at the past, they inevitable(inevitably) keep their eye (eyes) on individuals who have a creditable record other than those nameless humble man.(本段的论点我没想到,呵呵值得学习. 不过,中间那段介绍历史事件记录的发展过程应该更加突出"困难"这个主题意思)
Another reason for the phenomenon will be ascribed to the complexity of history events, especially social events that were participated by almost any one living in the era when the events happened. The thought that the study of history should examine those involved in certain event one by one can only confuse the historian rather than clarify the truth. As the great individual was selected as leader or symbol of a(an)event and participated in it directly, it is reasonable to assert that this individual is on behalf of those (who) quietly stand behind supporting him or her, and a careful study of this person will give us a vivid picture of how the event happened meanwhile some interesting subtle factors that have accelerated or delayed the story will also be revealed.(个人觉得这一段的论述稍显空洞,最好有点例子)
By the end, the fundamental functions of the civilians have been acknowledged and will be better studied by future historians. Karl Marx had pointed out that the ordinary people made history possible and heroes only accelerated it by following their needs. No matter how eager Lincoln is to emancipate slaves, he can not make it in ancient Roman but only when people want to free them thousands of years latter. And no matter how intelligent Einstein was born, he would only think about how to catch a tiger if he is born 5 thousand years before Newton(好幽默啊). The situation may improve as the human civilization become more sophisticated, more personal information can be remained for even normal person and make it possible for future historians to reevaluate the ordinary based on these data.(爱因斯坦的例子好象没和论点结合起来)To sum up,  the focus on the great is reasonable due to lack of information and the situation is going to improve in the future as the development of information technology. All these ideas should be rooted in the general conception that it is the common people who make history possible and the key individual is great for their courage and effort to serve them.

总体感觉作者想要表达的意思还是挺清楚的,不过要注意举完例子后应向主题引申一下; 另外一些语法错误要注意避免; 特别是在使用长句时应定要把意思表达清楚,适当的使用些短局也是挺好的.

有时间帮我拍一下呵!
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