Augement76 同主题写作请互拍，

shanekunUID: 2104358

According to a group volunteers' report of the positive effect of Luxess facial cream, the arguer claimed that this product remarkably improve the condition of facial skin. How ever, scrutiny on the argument would reveal a series of fallacies in the reasoning line, concerning the sampling process and casual relation ship between the product and effects.

First of all, a convincing experiment should be well controlled in the participants, a survey and selection of participants should be well organized; however the speaker of Luxess provide no further information about them, such as their ages, genders, or basic conditions of skin face, thus the reports of Luxess cream would not convincing enough. For example, the young boys or girls skin were more vital and easy to nurture, while the skin of middle ages or old people were already matured and the replacement of the skin cell was slowing down even stopped, the product will show great difference between these two group of people. Thus, a product effective to youth would not necessarily be effective to the old people as the same.

Even if the sampling of the experiment have been well controlled, include various people, youth and olds, male and female, the  improvement of their skin condition could not inevitably ascribed to the using of Luxess, since the speaker severely failed to rule out other factors which could also improve the participants skin conditions, for example in point, the mild soap. As a result, the customers could naturally doubt that whether the improvement was caused by using Luxess, or simply by the mild soap? Consequently, the acclamation for Luxess' effect would be severely undermined.

Last but not the least, according to the speaker for Luxess, the participants in this experiment simply "reported" marked improvement in the way their "looked and felt", but not a persuasive qualification from authentic medical of facial health organization. Thus the test-takers personal feeling may be not precise and could be remarkably influenced by their psychological factors. In addition, a safe facial product should be tested carefully and prudently to be qualified as non-toxic contained, from this point, one month test was far from enough.

In sum, the speaker fail to provide the basic profiles of participants, neither rule out other factors which may be responsible for the result, thus the conclusion of Luxess was open to doubt

[ Last edited by staralways on 2005-7-24 at 11:56 ]

zhihengUID: 190545

According to a group volunteers' report of the positive effect of Luxess facial cream, the arguer claimed that this product remarkably improve the condition of facial skin. How ever, scrutiny on the argument would reveal a series of fallacies in the reasoning line, concerning the sampling process and casual relation ship between the product and effects.

First of all, a convincing experiment should be well controlled in the participants, a survey and selection of participants should be well organized;这个ＴＳ写的别别扭扭的　^_^ however the speaker of Luxess provide no further information about them, such as their ages, genders, or basic conditions of skin face, thus the reports of Luxess cream would not convincing enough. For example, the young boys or girls skin were more vital and easy to nurture, while the skin of middle ages or old people were already matured and the replacement of the skin cell was is slowing down even stopped, the product will show great difference between these two group of people. Thus, a product effective to youth would not necessarily be effective to the old people as the same.

Even if the sampling of the experiment have been well controlled, include various people, youth and olds, male and female, the  improvement of their skin condition could not inevitably ascribed to the using of Luxess, since the speaker severely failed to rule out other factors which could also improve the participants skin conditions, for example in point, the mild soap. As a result, the customers could naturally doubt that whether the improvement was caused by using Luxess, or simply by the mild soap? Consequently, the acclamation for Luxess' effect would be severely undermined. 这一段写的不错，让步，观点，举例，结论，一气呵成
Last but not the least, according to the speaker for Luxess, the participants in this experiment simply "reported" marked improvement in the way their "looked and felt", but not a persuasive qualification from authentic medical of facial health organization. Thus the test-takers personal feeling may be not precise and could be remarkably influenced by their psychological factors. In addition, a safe facial product should be tested carefully and prudently to be qualified as non-toxic contained, from this point, one month test was far from enough.　这一段和第二段关系比较密切，都是有关participants的，两个段落挨着比较好。
In sum, the speaker fail to provide the basic profiles of participants, neither rule out other factors which may be responsible for the result, thus the conclusion of Luxess was open to doubt

另外，测试时间短这个问题没有批驳，这个flaw是很经典的。
还有，side effects,也是关于推荐产品这类题目里都可以提一下

互改愉快

lignumvitaeUID: 207532

According to a group volunteers' report 两个名词并列，怪怪的of the positive effect of Luxess facial cream, the arguer claimed都是用一般现在时吧 that this product remarkably improves the condition of facial skin. How ever However笔误吧, scrutiny on the argument would reveal a series of fallacies in the reasoning line, concerning the sampling process and casual relationship between the product and effects为何又复数？.

First of all, a convincing experiment should be well controlled in the participants, 两个句子间用了逗号却没有连词a survey and selection of participants should be well organized; however the speaker of Luxess provide no further information about them, such as their ages, genders, or basic conditions of skin face, thus the reports of Luxess cream would not convincing enough. For example, the young boys or girls skin were more vital and easy to nurture, while the skin of middle ages or old people were already matured and the replacement of the skin cell was slowing down even stopped, the product will show great differences between these two groups of people. Thus, a product effective to youth would not necessarily be effective to the old people as the same. 时态还是统一一下的好吧，还有些用词值得推敲
Even if the samplings of the experiment have been well controlled, include various people, youth and olds, male and female, the  improvement of their skin condition could not inevitably ascribed to the using of Luxess, since the speaker severely failed to rule out other factors which could also improve the participants skin conditions, for example in point这个用法你确定么, the mild soap. As a result, the customers could naturally doubt that whether the improvement was caused by using Luxess, or simply by the mild soap? Consequently, the acclamation for Luxess' effect would be severely undermined.

Last but not the least, according to the speaker for Luxess, the participants in this experiment simply "reported" marked improvement in the way their "looked and felt", but not a persuasive qualification from authentic medical of facial health organization. Thus the test-takers personal feeling may be not precise and could be remarkably influenced by their psychological factors. In addition, a safe facial product should be tested carefully and prudently to be qualified as non-toxic contained, from this point, one month test was far from enough.最后这点可以放到第一段讲

In sum, the speaker fails to provide the basic profiles of participants, neither rule out other factors which may be responsible for the result, thus the conclusion of Luxess was open to doubt

时态有点不统一，部分语法再改改，+Ｕ！

[ Last edited by lignumvitae on 2005-7-24 at 22:47 ]

echostateUID: 194935

来晚了，马上拍！

echostateUID: 194935

According to a group volunteers' report of the positive effect of Luxess facial cream, the arguer claimed that this product remarkably improve the condition of facial skin. How ever [however], scrutiny [A more careful scrutiny] on the argument would reveal [reveals] a series of fallacies in the reasoning line [of this argument], concerning the sampling process and casual relation ship [causal relationship] between the product and [its] effects [这个between感觉怪怪地——中国式英语吧，“产品与效果”~~~].

First of all, a convincing experiment should be well controlled in the participants, a survey and selection of participants should be well organized [这个分句和第一句完全是同一句话的两种说法噢：（]; however the speaker of Luxess provide no further information about them, such as their ages, genders, or basic conditions of skin face [skin face，好奇怪的英语噢^O^], thus the reports of Luxess cream would not [be] convincing enough. For example, the young boys or girls [’] skin were more vital and easy to nurture, while the skin of middle ages or old people were already matured and the replacement of the skin cell was slowing down [or] even stopped, the product will show great difference between these two group of people. Thus, a product effective to youth would not necessarily be effective to the old people as the same.

Even if the sampling of the experiment have been well controlled, include various people, youth and olds, male and female, the improvement of their skin condition could not inevitably ascribed to the using of Luxess, since the speaker severely failed to rule out other factors which could also improve the participants [’][第二次了，所有格错误] skin conditions, for example in point [赫赫，怪句子], the mild soap. As a result, the customers could naturally doubt that whether the improvement was caused by using Luxess, or simply by the mild soap? Consequently, the acclamation for Luxess' effect would be severely undermined.

Last but not the least, according to the speaker [’declaration] for Luxess, the participants in this experiment simply "reported" marked improvement in the way their "looked and felt", but not a persuasive qualification from authentic medical [from分句和of分句调换] of facial health organization. Thus the test-takers [’][第三次，所有格错误] personal feeling may be not precise and could be remarkably influenced by their psychological factors. In addition [这个可以独立写一段啊！加上一些列举他因——比如长期使用效果不好，甚至长期使用致癌~~~], a safe facial product should be tested carefully and prudently to be qualified as non-toxic contained, from this point, one month test was far from enough.

In sum, the speaker fail [fails] to provide the basic profiles of participants, neither rule out other factors which may be responsible for the result, thus the conclusion of Luxess was open to doubt

shanekunUID: 2104358

concerning the sampling process and casual relation ship [causal relationship] between the product and [its] effects [这个between感觉怪怪地——中国式英语吧，“产品与效果”~~~].

恩，有点别扭，concerning the sampling of the survey and the causal relationship between the improvment of volunteers' skin of face and Luxess cream.

First of all, a convincing experiment should be well controlled in the participants, a survey and selection of participants should be well organized [这个分句和第一句完全是同一句话的两种说法噢：（];

First of all, for an experiment to be accurate, it must be controlled, with a balance between the experimental and the control groups. In the study above, we know nothing about the volunteers' gender, age, and basic profile of face skin, thus the conclusion of the effect of Luxess may not be applied to all the customs. For example, if the partcipants of this experiment are most youth, whose skin metabolic circle is absolutly shorter thus be more sensitive to facial products han the old people, thus the generalized conclusion about Luxess is rendered partial and unreliable.



多谢指点！

wangjue12UID: 2207540

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