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在等同学带饭回来!帮你看看吧!下次最好把原题也附上哦!考过了题目大概都记不清楚了!:)发了才知道已经有人帮你改了!不过还是谈谈我的意见哦!毕竟是新社员嘛!;)
In this argument, the speaker claims the Adams Reality(AR) sells houses more quickly than Fitch Reality(FR) andeven at a good price. In order to bolster this viewpoint, the speaker asserts several advantages of AR such as more agents, more revenue, higher price and shorter time. Although the claim seems plausible at the first glance, a further scrutiny will reveal some logic flaws.
Firstly, the speaker fails to establish a causal relationship between more employees and more efficiency because we cannot rule out the possibility that FR's agents do better work as a whole although the number of them is less than AR. Just as we cannot make evaluation on students according to their time spent on learning, we have no reason to judge the efficiency of the two companies on the basis of agent’s number. It is to say, the agents of FR may be so skilled that no more agents are needed while AR has to hire more people to offset their lack of proficiency. So the argument is not convincing可以酌情加上as it stands,帮助增加字数!.
Then the speaker suffers another fallacy of confusing revenue with profits. As is known to all, profit equals revenue subtracting cost, which equation tells us that only high revenue cannot assure high profit. So there is the possibility that in order to sell more houses, AR has to pay a large sum of costs to attract customers, which leads to a high revenue versus low profit.
In addition, the speaker weakens his claim by doing false analogy of selling speeds and/forneglecting of time span and house difference. On one hand, the situation may has been changed so dramatically that experience ten year ago has nothing to do with the current situation. On the other hand, different houses, in terms of location, decoration and other factors, infers different demand and supply, which means that you may sell one house very easily while feel extremely difficult to sell another one. So this analogy is nonsense.
To sum up, as the speaker fails to give any convincing evidence that AR enjoys a better efficiency , this article is misleading and groundless. To make this argument tenable, the claimer should provide more accurate numbers and do more thoroughly research to substantiate his idea.
总评:好严密和深入透彻的分析,没有什么明显的缺点哦!对了!有一个小小的建议哦!:D分论点每一个段的信号词最好统一一下!比如:firstly,secondly,thirdly; to begin with, then, in addition.So much advisement for your exercise.wish you do a better job next time!
[ Last edited by polymath on 2005-9-5 at 18:45 ] |
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Mencius said,"When heaven is about to confer a great office on any man,it first exercises his mind with suffering, and his sinews and bones with toil.It exposes his body to hunger………….By all these methods, it stimulates his mind, consolidates his character, and increases his efficiency".
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