issue11 [清凉夏日二组] 全球性大学

leonnieUID: 2216142

题目：ISSUE 11 - "All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."
字数：534                    日期：2006-7-19

We live in a world that is composed of thousands of races and cultures, however, the distinction among these races begins to bring about many problems which remain to be settled down. Although the feasibility deserves to be inspected, all nations taking part in establishing a global university will be a constructive plateau to discuss to resolve the most persistent social problems of the world.

The global problems counteract the process of our society and begin to endanger the survival of human species. Overpopulation of an area can lead to the shortage of food; migrants between two areas can contribute to inter--group conflicts; racial discrimination can bring about wars; depletion of the atmospheric ozone can result in the skin diseases from the harmful ultraviolet radiation; diminishing forests can conduce to the desert; global warming can cause rise of the sea level; the overusing of coal and petroleum can induce energy crisis. Environental, economical ,social and other potential problems would inevitably threaten the existence of hunam beings. No nation can afford to overlook these problems. If they do not to take measures, the prices of to do so will be disastrous.

However, establishing a global university help to solve the global problems. Faculties and students with different education and perspectives from all over the world would provide a diversity of ideas and a myrid of methods. Consider,  students can learn the measures by which other nations take to address their problems. Students from Africa could learn from Chinese in the way to haddle the problem of overpopulation and students from China could learn from the techniques implemented by America in dealing with the pollution. Moreover, students with different education and iedas can join together to discuss the ways how to address global problems. Therefore, buliding a global university will contribute to dealing with the global problems.

Moreover, to a certain extent, buliding a global university help to expunge misunderstandings and distrust among nations. We draw lessons from histroy that a little discord or disputation would cause wars among countries, some of which might be preconditioned to avoid. However, with extensive discussions, students and faculty in this global university have the chance to demonstrate their positions on the basis of their own nation as well they could listen to others  showing their ideas. In this plateau based on understanding and discussing , some of the distrust might be eliminated.

Although buliding a global unviversity would serve the interests of all nations, the feasbility of it remains to discuss and inspect. There are many problems deserved to be consider about, such as how to select the students and falculties to enroll in, how to set up curriculums and what to teach. What’s more, how to utilize resources brought by the students and faculites needs to be better concerned, which corresponds to whether the effects of the global university would do as we expect. Therefore, it is a constructive but troublesome idea to eatablish a global university for all the nation.

To sum up, the peresistent problems begin to threaten the existence of human beings and great efforts must be made to settle down them effectively. If it is practical and feasible, we call for to establish a global university by all nations.

PsychocandyUID: 171159

题目：ISSUE 11 - "All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."
字数：534                    日期：2006-7-19

We live in a world that is composed of thousands of races and cultures, however, the distinction among these races begins to bring about many problems which remain to be settled down.[这里说distinction among these races带来许多待解决的问题，而第二段论及的很多问题都不是由这种distinction带来的，只占一小部分。] Although the feasibility deserves to be inspected, all nations taking part in establishing a global university will be a constructive plateau to discuss[discuss要及物，这里加个and] to resolve the most persistent social problems of the world.

The global problems counteract the process[progress] of our society and begin to endanger the survival of human species. Overpopulation of an area can lead to the shortage of food; migrants between two areas can contribute to inter--group conflicts; racial discrimination can bring about wars; depletion of the atmospheric ozone can result in the skin diseases from the harmful ultraviolet radiation; diminishing forests can conduce to the desert; global warming can cause rise of the sea level; the overusing of coal and petroleum can induce energy crisis. Environmental, economical, social and other potential problems would inevitably threaten the existence of hunam beings. No nation can afford to overlook these problems. If they do not to take measures, the prices of to do so[do so只能指带take measures，可以后半句改成they will have to pay disastrous prices] will be disastrous.

However, establishing a global university help[helps] to solve the global problems. Faculties and students with different education and perspectives from all over the world would provide a diversity of ideas and a myrid of methods. Consider, students can learn the measures by which other nations take to address their problems. Students from Africa could learn from Chinese in[about，因为学是learn about] the way to haddle the problem of overpopulation and students from China could learn from the techniques implemented by America in dealing with the pollution. Moreover, students with different education and iedas can join together to discuss the ways how[the ways去掉或者discuss去掉] to address global problems. Therefore, buliding a global university will contribute to dealing with the global problems.

Moreover, to a certain extent, buliding a global university help[helps] to expunge misunderstandings and distrust among nations. We draw[learn lessons] lessons from histroy that a little discord or disputation would cause wars among countries, some of which might be preconditioned to avoid. However, with extensive discussions, students and faculty in this global university have the chance to demonstrate their positions on the basis of their own nation as well they could listen to others showing their ideas. In this plateau based on understanding and discussing[discussion，如果是现在分词的话那discuss要及物], some of the distrust might be eliminated.

Although buliding a global unviversity would serve the interests of all nations, the feasbility of it remains to discuss and inspect[remains to be discussed and inspected]. There are many problems deserved[改成that deserve或者deserving] to be consider[considered] about, such as how to select the students and falculties to enroll in[enroll them in，或者就去掉to enroll in], how to set up curriculums and what to teach. What’s more, how to utilize resources brought by the students and faculites needs to be better concerned[concern的用法一般都是something concern somebody，所以这里不对，改成considered就可以了], which corresponds to whether the effects of the global university would do as we expect. Therefore, it is a constructive but troublesome idea to eatablish a global university for all the nation.

To sum up, the peresistent problems begin to threaten the existence of human beings and great efforts must be made to settle down them effectively. If it is practical and feasible, we call for to establish[call for the establishment of] a global university by all nations.

下面是concern作为动词的解释和用法：
concern 2 verb
concern [transitive]
1.[not in passive] if a story, book, report etc concerns someone or something, it is about them
This study concerns couples' expectations of marriage. The report concerns the drug traffic on the Mexican-US border.
2.to make someone feel worried or upset
Issues like food additives do concern me.
3.[not in passive] if an activity, situation, rule etc concerns you, it affects you or involves you
The tax changes will concern large corporations rather than small businesses.
4.concern yourself with/about something
formal to become involved in something because you are interested in it or because it worries you
He told them not to concern themselves about him. He loved his wife, and concerned himself with her needs and desires.
5.to whom it may concern
an expression written at the beginning of a formal letter when you do not know the name of the person you want to communicate with

victor_du001UID: 2230227

感觉楼主 文章结构和思路都比较好，
但是似乎遣词造句上过于追求复杂，反而暴露了自己一些基本功上的不足之处

leonnieUID: 2216142

多谢  我再仔细改改