179团队？独立工作？请拍砖

toeflgaryUID: 2202243

Topic:179)        Is it more important to be able to work with a group of people on a team or to work independently? Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer.
能够和团队一起工作比独立工作更重要吗？

As a senior, I will soon step out of ivory tower and have to face the problem of job. Nowadays, SOHO (small office, home office) has become a new lifestyle for a great number of people, they chose to work alone. The question of going to a big company or becoming a SOHO kind of person haunted many people for a long time. In fact, the idea behind it is working with a lot of people or working independently. For me, I value working with people more.

First of all, the task we take requires us to work with others. Thousand years ago, ancient people could work alone to get food, kill animals and build their home without working with other. The reason why they can finish all these works all by themselves and still survival is that these tasks are relatively simple, they can totally handle that. Time changes, so do the contents of tasks. Living an unprecedented complicated world, we are facing the challenge. The things we do become more complex, it’s beyond our capability, and we need others’ help to accomplish our goal. I want to take journalism as an example, as I took journalism as my major. Every time you watch CNN’s correspondent reporting news, you need to know that the news isn’t merely the effort of the correspondent. The process includes so many steps, like you need to gather news, to interview, to edit…. Each step has its own works to operate that, and reporter is just one of them. If he finishes these alone, we probably see the news months later. Teamwork not only improves efficiency, but helps us to complete huge work.

Second, working with a group of people also has advantage to lessen the work tension. For the sake of keeping their job, lots of people have to work around the clock and the stress they undertook is unimaginable. Maybe that explains why the suicide rate for work is so high. The situation could be worse if we can’t solve it. However, teamwork provides us a good solution to diminish the tension. You can pour your troubles to your colleagues; have a little gossip with them during the break. And their warm comfort or positive feedback is a great outlet for the stress and energize you in the coming tasks.

Definitely, there have some merits to work independently. For instance, there is not a lot of restriction in the work process; you don’t have to make a special effort to operate in coordination with others. And you can avoid the conflict which could break out when you are working with your colleagues.

In sum, both sides have considerable merits when it comes to work, but after carefully weighing up the facts, working with other people carries more weight than working alone, it combines little individual forces together to turn into a stronger power and enable us to perform the big project.

[ 本帖最后由 sissilei 于 2007-5-28 08:21 编辑 ]

NETEMUID: 2283160

替你顶下但同一个帖子发两遍就没意思了

toeflgaryUID: 2202243

各位大侠帮帮忙，感觉这篇文章有很多问题，希望大家能指正。谢谢了

wgaggassi34UID: 2279352

有个专门的作文贴~
你去找找,然后贴上去
别重新开贴!
:loveliness:

goodgoodstudyUID: 201753

第一段1. they chose to work alone之前需要一个连词；

第二段2.working with other--〉others；
         3.they can totally handle that--〉之前需要一个连词，而且totally不好，需改成well或者successfully等意思，lz自己揣摩；
         4.Living an unprecedented complicated world--〉living in an......；
         5.journalism这个例子的描述语言上有比较大的问题，具体说不上错，但是太口语化了，和之前的文风不符合；

第三段6.是否意味着不能单人完成的任务必须就应该由集体完成，从而意味着团队合作更重要呢？那么我认为一定还有适合单人完成而不能有团队完成的任务吧；比如你和你老婆或者你老公培育下一代吧；lz好好考虑下第二段和第三段的例证方向问题；

第四段7.太仓促了，可以适当多写些；

第五段8.both sides have considerable merits when it comes to work这句话说完了就等于把你之前说的全否定了，这种废话不要写；既然你选择了你支持的一面，而且也具体陈述过了你不支持的一面的一些优点，这就足够了，中国人这种中庸之道在英文中不试用，你必须旗帜鲜明地在总结段落表达你的态度，而不要对内容做任何的总结，因为这些都是你在之前的部分的任务。

第一段开头不错，成功偷换概念；引入SOHO概念。
正面例证部分需要好好审视下你的观点是否很支持你的论点，不能以偏概全。起码你应该这样说，一件事情可以由单人和集体同时完成，而在以下两重要方面，都证明集体的力量大得多，事情被完成的完美多。
最后两段没什么意见，记住英语文章没有总--〉分--〉总结构的，最后一段你想写就写你的态度，不要去涉及内容。both这样的字眼不要再出现。

alice19800326UID: 2334132

第一句 job seeking