跪求高手改作文

sanmuyi3868111UID: 2332555

越详细越好，小妹感激涕零
Some people prefer to eat at food stands or restaurant. Others prefer to prepare at home. Which do you prefer?
Depending on personal experience, personality type and emotional concern, we find that some people support the idea of eating at food stand or restaurants whereas others prefer to prepare food at home. From my point of view, it is more advisable to choose to eat at stands or restaurants rather than prepare food at home. My arguments for this point are listed as follows:
One chief reason, which can be seen by every person, is that eating at food stands or restaurants greatly save time. There is no doubt that a housewife spends lots of time cooking, which  is from buying vegetable and condiments, washing vegetable and meat to splitting them , not only time-wasting , but also  tedious. In contrast, we just take a few minute waiting and then some delicious food will be supplied when eat outside. In some case, it is obviously that office works who work from morning to midnight and some people who would like enjoy more leisure time prefer to choose this convenient way.
The second one, however, is from another viewpoint that we would eat delicious food which we cannot make at home. In general, there are numerous excellent chafes that can provide typical dish of other countries. For instance, perhaps you have no chance to taste the Chinese’ famous dish “Kungbao chicken” at home, but you could get it in a Chinese restaurant.
In addition, it’s an ideal place for gathering with relatives and friends. Namely, we could get a relatively freedom space without external interrupt, furthermore, we wouldn’t disturb our neighborhood at the meaning while. What’s more, restaurants can supply more alternative food; this is undoubtedly a life-saving straw for those who are not good at cooking..
In a nutshell, I prefer to eat at food at stands or restaurant for the reasons mentioned above. Though this way costs more money, yet it saves more time and provides more happiness.

kevinliu6883UID: 2338522

This composition looks well constructed, logical and free of gramer errors. :loveliness:

The shortcoming is lack of a description of "you". If you are a busy professional and big money mamer, all reasons you provided are established. If your income is modest, or you have a hobby to try new food by yourself, that would be another story.

I guess you must have practised spoken English. There is a similar script. See practice makes perfect. You will grow strong. But further judgement should be made before writing. Following suit is for a beginner. Masterpiece comes from deep thought.

[ 本帖最后由 kevinliu6883 于 2007-5-22 12:24 编辑 ]

sanmuyi3868111UID: 2332555

兄弟……谢了……回去再研究一下