Issue11 【0710G-小猪快跑小组】第1次作业 By Shalon

shalonbasUID: 2184474

TOPIC: ISSUE 11 - "All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."
WORDS: 661          TIME: 65 min          DATE: 2007-7-17

As the rapid development of globalization leading into the era that many problems occurring are not just confined within a single nation but also related to other countries in the world, such as the pollution of environment, lack of energy, and threat of the nuclear bomb, it is of paramount importance to solve these problems through negotiation and coordination between different countries. Therefore, when facing these mutual problems, all the nations should cooperate and work them out together, which makes it necessary that they should be willing to know and understand with each other. Although it is helpful to establish a university where students from all over the world are able to stay together and hence know the world well from their fellow classmates, the effect of this global university in solving the social problems is doubtful.

Admittedly, such a university has a positive effect on solving the international problems, for the students who have learned the history and culture of other countries can bring them back to their motherlands and thus help their countries know better about the whole world. As stated in The Clash of civilizations And the Remaking of the World Order written by Huntington, it is due to the conflicts among different civilizations that lots of international problems are generated. Thus, such understanding between different countries is favorable to solve the existing problems and can prevent some other problems to occur as well. At the mean time, since many problems are multifaceted and complicated, learning from other countries can help one nation study the problem from a brand new perspective, which can also lead to a good solution.

However, the university does not have much effect on the conquest of those social problems, because it is not the students but the leaders who are responsible for the policies of one country. Though the students who might have great ideas can make suggestions to the country, but their effort will down the drain without the adoption of their proposals, which is very likely to happen because the influence of a student is so limited before one is elected to the administration. Therefore, the more efficient and direct way is to establish a platform where the leaders or policy makers of different countries that are involved can communicate with each other and find the solution together. For instance, the United Nations has succeeded in mediating many conflicts ever since its establishment, such as the war between Israel and other Arabic countries in the Middle East. Moreover, the establishment of the World Trade Organization is very effective in solving economic conflicts between those developed and developing countries.

In addition, though the university is aiming to help students know better of the world, its actual effect is questionable. On one hand, what the students in this university can learn from their lessons is the history and culture of another country, rather than the current trend of that society or the contemporary culture of that country, which is the key to understanding with each other in solving problems.  On the other hand, in order to fulfill its objective, the university should provide lessons of languages and cultures covering all the different countries in the world, which is really a huge task considering the numbers of the current countries. This will definitely make the quality of such university questionable. As a matter of fact, a much better way is to send delegations to other countries, where the students can stay for a period of time and experience that country by themselves, which is already very common in nowadays.

To sum up, since more and more countries are involved in the international problems, a platform through which different countries can understand each other and figure out those problems together is essential. Though helpful in some way, the necessity of a global university in facilitating solving the problems is still doubtful, due to the limited influence of students and the actual effect of this university.

65分钟是写下来花的时间，构思也有一个小时了。大伙使劲拍，谢啦~~

-----------------------------------------------提纲---------------------------------------------
ISSUE 81
"Patriotic reverence for the history of a nation often does more to impede than to encourage progress."
出于爱国对于一个国家的尊崇往往不是促进进步而是阻碍进步

第一段，偏赞成，正确的态度是既不夜郎自大，也不妄自菲薄。
第二段，盲目爱国，不愿关心外面的进展，闭门造车。就像人在赛跑的时候只昂着头而不看终点线和对手，一味按自己的方向和节奏走，走到岔路也不自知。
第三段，盲目爱国还会导致看问题不够客观，对自己的缺点视而不见。死要面子活受罪。
第四段，（让步），盲目爱国不对，但也不能妄自菲薄，看不到优点，不敢创新。什么都跟国外学，而不因地制宜，活学活用。赛跑时如果总是走别人走过的路线则永远在后面。
第五段，正确的态度是正视自己优点，也能发现缺点并积极改正，才是进步的王道。

ISSUE 116
"With the growth of global networks in such areas as economics and communication, there is no doubt that every aspect of society—including education, politics, the arts, and the sciences—will benefit greatly from international influences."
随着全球网络在经济和通讯等领域中的发展，毫无疑问，社会的各个领域——包括教育、政治、艺术和科学——都会从国际影响中获益匪浅。

第一段，赞成
第二段，对教育和科学的影响，促进全人类科学文化信息的交流和扩大，如MIT的开放式课程，科学研究的网络数据库，IEEE。
第三段，对艺术的影响，各艺术流派的互相融合，传达给人们更丰富的信息：音乐剧《the lion king》（百老汇style+南非 Zulu Chants+印度尼西亚 Shadow puppet）
第四段, 对政治的影响，信息传达更流畅，促进各国互相了解文化和习惯，减少政治纠纷；而且起到了互相监督的作用。
第五段，随着人类社会和文明的发展，各个领域不断融合，各个国家的关系也越来越紧密。



[ 本帖最后由 shalonbas 于 2007-7-17 20:39 编辑 ]

ldongxpUID: 2311083

As the rapid development of globalization leading into the era that many problems occurring are not just confined within a single nation but also related to other countries in the world, such as the pollution of environment, lack of energy, and threat of the nuclear bomb, it is of paramount importance to solve these problems through negotiation and coordination between different countries. Therefore, when facing these mutual problems, all the nations should cooperate and work them out together, which makes it necessary that they should be willing to know and understand with each other. Although it is helpful to establish a university where students from all over the world are able to stay together and hence know the world well from their fellow classmates, the effect of this global university in solving the social problems is doubtful.
[我认为首段不必写这么长哦，扼要说明立场就好]

Admittedly, such a university has a positive effect on solving the international problems, for the students who have learned the history and culture of other countries can bring them back to their motherlands and thus help their countries know better about the whole world. As stated in The Clash of civilizations And the Remaking of the World Order written by Huntington, it is due to the conflicts among different civilizations that lots of international problems are generated. Thus, such understanding between different countries is favorable to solve the existing problems and can prevent some other problems to occur as well. At the meantime, since many problems are multifaceted and complicated, learning from other countries can help one nation study the problem from a brand new perspective, which can also lead to a good solution.However, the university does not have much effect on the conquest of those social problems, because it is not the students but the leaders who are responsible for the policies of one country. Though the students who might have great ideas can make suggestions to the country, but their effort will down the drain without the adoption of their proposals, which is very likely to happen because the influence of a student is so limited before one is elected to the administration. Therefore, the more efficient and direct way is to establish a platform where the leaders or policy makers of different countries that are involved can communicate with each other and find the solution together. For instance, the United Nations has succeeded in mediating many conflicts ever since its establishment, such as the war between Israel and other Arabic countries in the Middle East. Moreover, the establishment of the World Trade Organization is very effective in solving economic conflicts between those developed and developing countries. [不错，再来句小结就完美了]

In addition, though the university is aiming to help students know better of the world, its actual effect is questionable. On one hand, what the students in this university can learn from their lessons is the history and culture of another country,[这么说会不会有点勉强？或许可以学习时事的] rather than the current trend of that society or the contemporary culture of that country, which is the key to understanding with each other in solving problems.  On the other hand, in order to fulfill its objective, the university should provide lessons of languages and cultures covering all the different countries in the world, which is really a huge task considering the numbers of the current countries. This will definitely make the quality of such university questionable. As a matter of fact, a much better way is to send delegations to other countries, where the students can stay for a period of time and experience that country by themselves, which is already very common in nowadays.

To sum up, since more and more countries are involved in the international problems, a platform through which different countries can understand each other and figure out those problems together is essential. Though helpful in some way, the necessity of a global university in facilitating solving the problems is still doubtful, due to the limited influence of students and the actual effect of this university.
总的来说，很不错啦，例证，说理都有，只是稍稍注意结构，比如小结全段啦。

shalonbasUID: 2184474

嗯哪，很有道理，谢谢XP的建议

第三段中我的观点是要了解一个国家就应该亲自去体验一下而非在课堂上就能搞明白的；加上时政确实更严密一些，还好对我的出发点没有很大影响:)

Shania.33UID: 2363464

Issue11 【0710G-小猪快跑小组】第1次作业 By Shalon

TOPIC: ISSUE 11 - "All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."
WORDS: 661          TIME: 65 min          DATE: 2007-7-17

As the rapid development of globalization leading into the era that many problems occurring are not just confined within a single nation but also related to other countries in the world, （第一句颇有六分的长相）such as the pollution of environment, lack of energy, and threat of the nuclear bomb, it is of paramount importance to solve these problems through negotiation and coordination between different countries. Therefore, when facing these mutual problems, all the nations should cooperate and work them out together, which makes it necessary that they should be willing to know and understand with each other. Although it is helpful to establish a university where students from all over the world are able to stay together and hence know the world well from their fellow classmates, the effect of this global university in solving the social problems is doubtful.（首段TS姗姗来迟，建议往前放，把前面的长句放到另起单独段）

Admittedly, such a university has a positive effect on solving the international problems, for the students who have learned the history and culture of other countries can bring them back to their motherlands and thus help their countries know better about the whole world. As stated in The Clash of civilizations And the Remaking of the World Order written by Huntington, it is due to the conflicts among different civilizations that lots of international problems are generated.（其实例子可以更丰满一点，现意犹未尽） Thus, such understanding between different countries is favorable to solve the existing problems and can prevent some other problems to occur as well. At the mean time, since many problems are multifaceted and complicated, learning from other countries can help one nation study the problem from a brand new perspective, which can also lead to a good solution.

However, the university does not have much effect on the conquest of those social problems, because it is not the students but the leaders who are responsible for the policies of one country. Though the students who might have great ideas can make suggestions to the country, but their effort will down the drain without the adoption of their proposals, which is very likely to happen because the influence of a student is so limited before one is elected to the administration. Therefore, the more efficient and direct way is to establish a platform where the leaders or policy makers of different countries that are involved can communicate with each other and find the solution together. For instance, the United Nations has succeeded in mediating many conflicts ever since its establishment, such as the war between Israel and other Arabic countries in the Middle East. Moreover, the establishment of the World Trade Organization is very effective in solving economic conflicts between those developed and developing countries. （例子结尾总感觉意犹未尽。。。）

In addition, though the university is aiming to help students know better of the world, its actual effect is questionable. On one hand, what the students in this university can learn from their lessons is the history and culture of another country, rather than the current trend of that society or the contemporary culture of that country, which is the key to understanding with each other in solving problems.  On the other hand, in order to fulfill its objective, the university should provide lessons of languages and cultures covering all the different countries in the world, which is really a huge task considering the numbers of the current countries. This will definitely make the quality of such university questionable. As a matter of fact, a much better way is to send delegations to other countries, where the students can stay for a period of time and experience that country by themselves, which is already very common in nowadays.（让步段个人认为可以简单一点，突出前面的重点）

To sum up, since more and more countries are involved in the international problems, a platform through which different countries can understand each other and figure out those problems together is essential. Though helpful in some way, the necessity of a global university in facilitating solving the problems is still doubtful, due to the limited influence of students and the actual effect of this university.



-----------------------------------------------提纲---------------------------------------------
ISSUE 81
"Patriotic reverence for the history of a nation often does more to impede than to encourage progress."
出于爱国对于一个国家的尊崇往往不是促进进步而是阻碍进步

第一段，偏赞成，正确的态度是既不夜郎自大，也不妄自菲薄。
第二段，盲目爱国，不愿关心外面的进展，闭门造车。就像人在赛跑的时候只昂着头而不看终点线和对手，一味按自己的方向和节奏走，走到岔路也不自知。
第三段，盲目爱国还会导致看问题不够客观，对自己的缺点视而不见。死要面子活受罪。
第四段，（让步），盲目爱国不对，但也不能妄自菲薄，看不到优点，不敢创新。什么都跟国外学，而不因地制宜，活学活用。赛跑时如果总是走别人走过的路线则永远在后面。
第五段，正确的态度是正视自己优点，也能发现缺点并积极改正，才是进步的王道。

啥也不说了，和偶的提纲刚刚是反的，泪。。。

ps：作文见功底，模板味道不足，个人很喜欢。建议是例子可以再丰满一点，如果有时间。文笔不错，那么为什么不结尾升华煽情一下？现在的结尾感觉匆促了一点。
小要求是，有时间的话，下次作文帮偶看看哈。。

BBBWUID: 2144108

其实盲目爱国还有很多可以说，比如沙文主义和民族主义，这些都影响国家发展（促进/有害）

shalonbasUID: 2184474

非常感谢shania和BBBW的建议，呵呵

to  bbbw“爱国主义”这个题我比较头疼，BBBW能不能举个实际例子供我揣摩一下？

另外，to shania 我ISSUE 17中的让步段其实是第二段呐，就是admittedly开头那个~~~

再另外，你的arg俺试着改了改，记得去看看哈，呵呵

BBBWUID: 2144108

比如，纳粹德国。希特勒奉行的法西斯主义对国家在短期内摆脱经济危机和提高社会生产有促进作用，日耳曼人对其国家和民族达到了狂热的程度；但是长期来看，我们都知道结果了~

很多时候，民族主义、沙文主义对本国的发展会起到一定的推动作用，但是往往对他国造成不利影响，而这种影响长期积累后会反作用于本国，从而制约"fatherland"。

推荐看看wiki，http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Patriotic
"see also"里的东西也要看哦~
题目中的patrotic reverence是有点带positive色彩的说法

[ 本帖最后由 BBBW 于 2007-7-19 13:27 编辑 ]

shalonbasUID: 2184474

嗯，谢谢BBBW的解释，我去WIKI看了看，对Patriotism的解释以正面为主，只不过对本题而言我认为只要有例子，那两种态度都能写好。附上WIKI的主要解释

Patriotism denotes positive and supportive attitudes to a 'fatherland', by individuals and groups. The 'fatherland' (or 'motherland') can be a region or a city, but patriotism usually applies to a nation and/or a nation-state. Patriotism covers such attitudes as: pride in its achievements and culture, the desire to preserve its character and the basis of the culture, and identification with other members of the nation.

Patriotism has ethical connotations: it implies that the 'fatherland' (however defined) is a moral standard or moral value in itself.  Patriotism also implies that the individual should place the interests of the nation above their personal and group interests. In wartime, the sacrifice may extend to their own life. Death in battle for the fatherland is the archetype of extreme patriotism.

wu_jie07UID: 2146237

As the rapid development ofglobalization leading into the era that many problems occurring are notjust confined within a single nation but also related to othercountries in the world, such as the pollution of environment, lack ofenergy, and threat of the nuclear bomb, it is of paramount importanceto solve these problems through negotiation and coordination betweendifferent countries. Therefore, when facing these mutual problems, allthe nations should cooperate and work them out together, which makes itnecessary that they should be willing to know and understand with eachother. Although it is helpful to establish a university where studentsfrom all over the world are able to stay together and hence know theworld well from their fellow classmates, the effect of this globaluniversity in solving the social problems is doubtful.英文功底不俗，句子写得不错，不过对付考试要拿高分，最好去研究一下GRE作文的“八股文”，不然你英文句子写得再好，老外不喜欢也要吃亏。开头提出观点，简洁明了，开门见山。后面三段展开，一段一个论点，最后收尾。这里开头说得太繁杂，老外脑子比较笨的，他们喜欢清晰简单的行文。

Admittedly, such auniversity has a positive effect on solving the international problems,for the students who have learned the history and culture of othercountries can bring them back to their motherlands and thus help theircountries know better about the whole world. As stated in The Clash of civilizations And the Remaking of the World Order writtenby Huntington, it is due to the conflicts among different civilizationsthat lots of international problems are generated. 就差一句话，具体展开一个例子，这个书如何帮助解决世界问题的，就圆满了，编一个也可以呀，不然论述不充分，后面又没接上的感觉Thus, suchunderstanding between different countries is favorable to solve theexisting problems and can prevent some other problems to occur as well.At the mean time, since many problems are multifaceted这个单词检查一下，我没查到 and complicated,learning from other countries can help one nation study the problemfrom a brand？？ new perspective, which can also lead to a good solution.例子好像说明不充分，另外论述要加强。

However, the universitydoes not have much effect on the conquest of those social problems,because it is not the students but the leaders who are responsible forthe policies of one country. Though the students who might have greatideas can make suggestions to the country, but their effort will downthe drain without the adoption of their proposals, which is very likelyto happen because the influence of a student is so limited before oneis elected to the administration. Therefore, the more efficient anddirect way is to establish a platform where the leaders or policymakers of different countries that are involved can communicate witheach other and find the solution together. For instance, the UnitedNations has succeeded in mediating many conflicts ever since itsestablishment, such as the war between Israel and other Arabiccountries in the Middle East. Moreover, the establishment of the WorldTrade Organization is very effective in solving economic conflictsbetween those developed and developing countries. 这里不妨加个段落小结。另外这段看的有点糊涂。TS好像意思是Global university 比较没有实权，起得作用不大，后面为什么举WTO和联合国的例子，这个只能证明这些组织的有效性不能说明G U不会有效。

In addition, though theuniversity is aiming to help students know better of the world, itsactual effect is questionable. On one hand, what the students in thisuniversity can learn from their lessons is the history and culture ofanother country, rather than the current trend of that society or thecontemporary culture of that country, which is the key to understandingwith each other in solving problems.  现代的一些情况也可以通过课堂了解到啊，不用只学历史吧，比如经济学必然是要结合现在的经济现象进行教学的On the other hand, in order tofulfill its objective, the university should provide lessons oflanguages and cultures covering all the different countries in theworld, which is really a huge task considering the numbers of thecurrent countries. 我觉得这个理由比较牵强，就像WTO和联合国一样 他们肯定用国际通用的语言---英语。This will definitely make the quality of suchuniversity questionable. As a matter of fact, a much better way is tosend delegations to other countries, where the students can stay for aperiod of time and experience that country by themselves, which isalready very common in nowadays.

To sum up, since more andmore countries are involved in the international problems, a platformthrough which different countries can understand each other and figureout those problems together is essential. Though helpful in some way,the necessity of a global university in facilitating solving theproblems is still doubtful, due to the limited influence of studentsand the actual effect of this university.

英文功底不错，行文很流畅，句子写得不错。就是要注意全文的结构，和论述的思路，这些是GRE作文最最重要的地方，论坛上的资料有很多非常精彩的论述，相信你多揣摩一下，你离他们就不远了！
自己的看法，互相学习，自己写的都很烂，惭愧惭愧