Argument120 【7.24 限时成功，可惜就批了两点】拍，狠拍

gyyxUID: 2290150

TOPIC: ARGUMENT120 - The following appeared in a health newsletter.
"A ten-year nationwide study of the effectiveness of wearing a helmet while bicycling indicates that ten years ago, approximately 35 percent of all bicyclists reported wearing helmets, whereas today that number is nearly 80 percent. Another study, however, suggests that during the same ten-year period, the number of accidents caused by bicycling has increased 200 percent. These results demonstrate that bicyclists feel safer because they are wearing helmets and they take more risks as a result. Thus, to reduce the number of serious injuries from bicycle accidents, the government should concentrate more on educating people about bicycle safety and less on encouraging or requiring bicyclists to wear helmets."
WORDS: 387          TIME: 00:30:00          DATE: 2007-7-24 15:20:01

The author recommend that the government should concentrate more on education of bicycle safety and less emphasis on wearing helmets, in order to reduce the number of serious injuries from bicycle accidents, as he thought it is wearing helmet that cause accidents. Before recommend this advice to the government, let us examine the evidence this argument based on with another angle.

At the first place, the author assumes a cause-effect relationship between the helmet wearing and bicycle accidents' increasing, based on two studies. Now, let's compromise that both the studies are scientific and practicable. Then is there any other possible reason for the accidents' increasing, and wearing helmets making people more risk is only one aspect? Maybe as ten years passed by, the number of bicycle increase twice or even more times than before. So if the accidents of bicycle increased also 200 percent, it is the same or less as before. Or perhaps, this increase of accidents is due to people’s carelessness, as they are more and more stressful and absent in mind under today's pressure. And maybe the present transportation situation is the main reason for this increase, as it is very confused in city’s traffic now. So without ruling out all reasonable explanation for this increase, we could not conclude that it is due to wearing helmet let the bicycler risk more is the reason for the increasing.

Secondly, the author takes this recommendation as a measure to reduce the number of serious injuries from bicycle accidents, which seems unreasonable in two aspects. On one hand, there's no survey or evidence could indicate that these accidents related to helmet is serious, maybe some is just light hurt. On the other hand, as common sense, watching helmets could help us keep our heads from serious injuries during accidents. Ignoring these two aspects make this recommendation less advisable.

Finally, to summarize, the author fails to convince us the helmet is the cause for serious injuries, due to not take some important factors into consideration. To bolster it, the author should provide more evidence, maybe a survey about the accident people indicating that they are more incline to risk due to the helmet. To better access it, the author should base this argument on elaborate analysis to demonstrate not other factors but the helmets cause the accidents.

huaxinluoboUID: 2326780

问题找的都对，不过第二段可以分 成两部分来写，一个写事故不一定严重了，另一个写不一定是由于头盔引起的。这样显得思路更清晰。
一个不足就是，文章中最好不要出现疑问句，否则还是有点像I.
开头和结尾写的太多了，最好更集中的攻击错误，没必要按照XDF讲的写。
加油吧

破釜沉舟UID: 2113052

The author recommend that the government should concentrate more on education of bicycle safety and less emphasis on wearing helmets, in order to reduce the number of serious injuries from bicycle accidents, as he thought it is wearing helmet that cause accidents. Before recommend this advice to the government, let us examine the evidence this argument based on with another angle.

At the first place, the author assumes a cause-effect relationship between the helmet wearing and bicycle accidents' increasing, based on two studies. Now, let's compromise that both the studies are scientific and practicable. Then is there any other possible reason for the accidents' increasing, and wearing helmets making people more risk is only one aspect? Maybe as ten years passed by, the number of bicycle increase twice or even more times than before. So if the accidents of bicycle increased also 200 percent, it is the same or less as before. Or perhaps, this increase of accidents is due to people’s carelessness, as they are more and more stressful and absent in mind under today's pressure. And maybe the present transportation situation is the main reason for this increase, as it is very confused in city’s traffic now. So without ruling out all reasonable explanation for this increase, we could not conclude that it is due to wearing helmet let the bicycler risk more is the reason for the increasing. (论者对于戴头盔会使人更容易冒险的结论完全没有根据，可以攻击一下。而且他没有提供任何资料证明戴头盔的人都觉得这样很安全。)

Secondly, the author takes this recommendation as a measure to reduce the number of serious injuries from bicycle accidents, which seems unreasonable in two aspects. On one hand, there's no survey or evidence could indicate that these accidents related to helmet is serious, maybe some is just light hurt. On the other hand, as common sense, watching helmets could help us keep our heads from serious injuries during accidents. Ignoring these two aspects make this recommendation less advisable.（说的好）

Finally, to summarize, the author fails to convince us the helmet is the cause for serious injuries, due to not take some important factors into consideration. To bolster it, the author should provide more evidence, maybe a survey about the accident people indicating that they are more incline to risk due to the helmet. To better access it, the author should base this argument on elaborate analysis to demonstrate not other factors but the helmets cause the accidents.

总的来说，攻击的还是比较好的，戴头盔会使人更容易冒险的结论也是一个重要错误，应予以驳斥

[ 本帖最后由 破釜沉舟 于 2007-7-25 22:02 编辑 ]