argument53 [勇往直前小组] 7.29

高加索UID：2246937

题目：ARGUMENT53 - Thirteen years ago, researchers studied a group of 25 infants who showed signs of mild distress when exposed to unfamiliar stimuli such as an unusual odor or a tape recording of an unknown voice. They discovered that these infants were more likely than other infants to have been conceived in early autumn, a time when their mothers' production of melatonin-a hormone known to affect some brain functions-would naturally increase in response to decreased daylight. In a follow-up study conducted earlier this year, more than half of these children-now teenagers-who had shown signs of distress identified themselves as shy. Clearly, increased levels of melatonin before birth cause shyness during infancy and this shyness continues into later life.
字数：390          用时：00:30:00          日期：2007-7-29 15:38:55

In this argument, the researchers claim that the shyness during infancy and its continuing into later life is due to the increased levels of melatonin before birth. The author's conclusion is based on some evidence and assumptions; however, it suffers from several critical fallacies.

First of all, we have good reason to doubt if the phenomenon that 25 infants showed signs of mild distress when exposed to unfamiliar stimuli such as an unusual odor or a tape recording of an unknown voice represents their shyness. No evidence convinces us that that kind of mild distress response is abnormal. Perhaps, most of the infants have a similar show towards unfamiliar stimuli. Therefore those infants' response may have little to do with the shyness, and is possible the usual reaction caused from the human instinct. More information about the relationship between the mild distresses responded to unfamiliar stimuli and the shyness should be provided.

Secondly, it is hasty for the arguer’s reaching to the conclusion that a cause-effect relationship exists between melatonin and shyness. As mentioned in the evidence, melatonin is a hormone known to affect some brain functions. However, what is the accurate brain functions affected and whether it has something to do with shyness is not informed. Possibly, the melatonin produced by their mothers only has an effect on the mothers' brain, not the infants'. At the same time, it is also possible that the melatonin may only influent infants' intelligence quotient not the characters. The possibilities above may weaken the convincing of the arguer's conclusion.

Thirdly, when we makes an explanation of the phenomenon in the study, some other possible factors which may sharp one's character and determine a person is shy or not should also be taken into account . Common sense informs us that objective conditions of family and society play an important role in determining a person's character. For example, maybe most of the 25 infants’ parents are shy for which when the infants grow up, they have a similar character with their parents. Perhaps the 25 infants live in the same region in which shyness is the common character of all the citizens there.

In summary, more information and evidence should be provided and at the same time the alternatives reasons should be taken into account if the author wants to persuade us the conclusion.

今天看了一点文章，尝试了一下不太用模版的A，不知道效果如何呢

forestlevyUID：2320694

In this argument, the researchers claim that the shyness during infancy and its continuing into later life is due to the increased levels of melatonin before birth. The author's conclusion is based on some evidence and assumptions; however, it suffers from several critical fallacies.

First of all, we have good reason to doubt if the phenomenon that 25 infants showed signs of mild distress when exposed to unfamiliar stimuli such as an unusual odor or a tape recording of an unknown voice represents their shyness. No evidence convinces us that that kind of mild distress response is abnormal. Perhaps, most of the infants have a similar show towards unfamiliar stimuli. Therefore those infants' response may have little to do with the shyness, and is possible the usual reaction caused from the human instinct. More information about the relationship between the mild distresses responded to unfamiliar stimuli and the shyness should be provided. （实验没对照怎么做嘛~批的很好~PS，如果是我还会说25个sample太少，冒得说服力。）

Secondly, it is hasty for the arguer’s reaching to the conclusion that a cause-effect relationship exists between melatonin and shyness. As mentioned in the evidence, melatonin is a hormone known to affect some brain functions. However, what is the accurate brain functions affected and whether it has something to do with shyness is not informed. Possibly, the melatonin produced by their mothers only has an effect on the mothers' brain, not the infants'. At the same time, it is also possible that the melatonin may only influent infants' intelligence quotient not the characters. The possibilities above may weaken the convincing of the arguer's conclusion.（恩，没有解释算什么理论...不过说影响智力而非性格有点画蛇添足，本题没提到智力的问题。）

Thirdly, when we makes an explanation of the phenomenon in the study, some other possible factors which may sharp one's character and determine a person is shy or not should also be taken into account . Common sense informs us that objective conditions of family and society play an important role in determining a person's character. For example, maybe most of the 25 infants’ parents are shy for which when the infants grow up, they have a similar character with their parents. Perhaps the 25 infants live in the same region in which shyness is the common character of all the citizens there.（很好，性格形成的原因分析....可以再添加一些其他的possible alternatives）

In summary, more information and evidence should be provided and at the same time the alternatives reasons should be taken into account if the author wants to persuade us the conclusion.

如果是限时完成的话，本文近乎完美。唯一的缺点是展开不够充分：400~450就是真正的无暇了.