十月金秋第三次作业

mantnkhUID: 2303879

作文
Some people prefer to live in a small town. Others prefer to live in abig city. Which place would you prefer to live in? Use specific reasonsand details to support your answer.
口语:   
In  your opinion, what is the most important characteristic(forexample, honesty, intelligence, sense of humor) that a person can haveto be successful in life? Use specific reasons and examples from yourexperience to explain your answer


作文 :           
       The controversity of a ideal living environment of modern people has been popular for a long time. Some people believed a moderen big city is the best place for living,while others argued that a small town may be the first choice people should take. As it for me, the former view that living in a big city has more advantages than living in a small town. My argument for this point is listed as follows.     
       The main reason I get is that living in a big city has been easiler and more convenient  (恩,是那样比较顺畅一些)for us. First of all, there are numerous shopping mall all over the city, in which you buy what you want (such commodities as clothes, food and so on) in anytime and anywhere. Secondly,the traffic problems are hardly to be seen in a big city, you can go to your school or workplace by buses or texies easily, it is so fast that a texi can drive that you needn't worry about being late for school or work.
       What is also worth noticing fact is the myriad challenges and chances a big city can offer.It is young people who is caring about their development of career must put them in a fully challenged living place, a big city is  obsolutely fitted for them. The competition in big cities are always drastic, you can mature 打错了 呵呵 your mind soon here and with these all kinds of job opportunities a newly paved road of career is opened for you.
       Admittedly, living in a smally town also has some benefits, such as quiet living space, fresh vegetables. But for us young peopole, the advantages of big city obviously outweight the trial benefits of small town.
       By considering all aspect we discussed above, we can safely draw the conclusion that living in a big city is better.  我也是超时了 看来还要加快速度啊

口语:  the most important characteristic of a person's success in life , i think,is the sense of responsibility.The 1st reason is when you were in your study period, the sense of responsibility make sure you learn more then others don't haveit .For example, with the responsibility  for yourself, you do your homework by yourself. The second is when you are in your career period, your sense of resposibility is the certification of your good characteristics.With resposobility for your consumer, you do your best to avoid bad product, so that your consumer will trust you.     谢谢你的意见,共勉,呵呵

[ 本帖最后由 mantnkh 于 2007-8-7 21:57 编辑 ]

mantnkhUID: 2303879

这次写的可真不顺手, 时间超了不少, 质量也没见好. 55555:mad
怎么半啊我

搓雀败蝶UID: 2369966

作文 :           
       The controversity of a ideal living environment of modern people has been popular for a long time. Some people believed a moderen big city is the best place for living,while others argued that a small town may be the first choice people should take. As it for me, the former view that living in a big city has more advantages than living in a small town. The reason I have are as follows. (最后一句有点别扭,have reason好像不太妥,不过主题段写的很好.)
       The main reason I got (get) is that living in a big city has been more convenient and easy(easier and more convinient这样比较顺畅) for us. First of all, there are numerous shopping mall all over the city, which you buy what you want such commodities as clothes, food in anytime and anywhere(句意有些晦涩,看了三遍才发现其实没错:原来从句修饰的是上面整个分句而不是shooping mall....建议改得易读一些).Secondly,the traffic problems(traffic prob指得好象是交通堵塞问题,我也没想到应该换什么词描述你说的交通便利问题.) are hardly to be seen in a big city, you can go to your school or workplace by buses or texies easily, it is so fast that a texi can drive that you needn't worry about being late for school or work.
       What is also worth noticing fact is the myriad challenges and chances a big city can offer.It is young people who is caring about their development of career must put them in a fully challenged living place, a big city is  obsolutely fitted for them. The competition in big cities are always drastic(非常好的词), you can muture(mature?好像也不能这么说) your mind soon here and with these all kinds of job opportunities a newly paved road of career is opened for you.
       Admittedly(nice word), living in a smally town also has some benefits, such as quiet living space, fresh vegetables. But for us young peopole, the advantages of big city obviously outweight the trial benefits of small town.
       By considering all aspect we discussed above, we can safely draw the conclusion that living in a big city is better.


最后感觉写的有点草率.建议重新处理一下最后两段,否则给人一种die in vain的感觉.
再次感谢详细批改我的作文,共勉!