写的第一篇task1,不知道怎么样,大家帮忙看下下

lazyboyUID: 2314767

题目是剑3的第一套的小作文,拜托大家看一下,如果有什么重大问题一定要指出啊,我9月8号就考了,现在才写第一篇,我都要慌死了,一点头绪都没有,哎!
There are two charts below. The first bar graph describes trends in tourists selection in traveling abroad throughout Japan between 1985 and 1995, and the second curve diagram illustrates the percentage that Australian occupied in the Japanese tourists market in the same period. As can be seen from these two charts, the number of Japanese tourists who travel abroad has generally grown over the 10-year period. Indeed, a marked more than 10 millions rise, which has tripled the total number, in the number of Japanese tourists traveling abroad , has been recorded between the year 1985 and 1995. Meanwhile, the Australia’s share of the Japanese tourist market has also gone up from 1985 to 1995, however, with some fluctuation.
  According to the first bar graph, there was a steady upward trend in the number of Japanese tourist traveling abroad, ranging from approximately 5 millions to around 11millions, from 1985 to 1990. Nevertheless, there has been a slight fall in this number in 1991, before it returned to the level of about 12 millions in 1992. After that, this number had a little growth in 1993, which reached approximately 12 millions, and from that moment on, a staggering growth, from 1993 to 1995, has taken place, and in 1995, the total number is over 15 millions.
  It is clear from the second curve diagram that in the period between 1985 and 1988, there was a raise in the percentage that Australia occupied in the market of Japanese tourists, which ranged from 2% to less than 5%. Nonetheless, this figure fell, sharply to the bottom, which is a little over 4% ,in 1989. After that, a stable growth has taken place, meanwhile, the percentage peaked in 1993 as a little over 6%, and followed by a slight drop in 1994, to approximately 6%.
  Generally speaking, we can conclude from these two charts above that there were upward trends in both the total number of Japanese tourists traveling abroad and the percentage that Australia occupied in the marker of Japanese tourists.

lazyboyUID: 2314767

拜托各位了

67169619UID: 2320695

太强了 你

task1就写了3百多字

lazyboyUID: 2314767

我是直接在电脑上面写的,也没有卡时间,就把所有能用的表示增长啊减少啊的词都堆上去了,也不知道怎么样

67169619UID: 2320695

麻烦你发个图表上来我看看咯 ？

我没有剑3的书啊

djconanUID: 2257634

lz你的字太小了，我看的眼睛疼，调大一些巴