作文基金登记处的水贴(已经关闭)

djconanUID: 2257634

:)

[ 本帖最后由 H-Kevin 于 2007-8-28 20:34 编辑 ]

forbeckUID: 2297645

把你的作文链接地址贴在这就好了:handshake

djconanUID: 2257634

改一下，这样大家眼睛不会太难受:)

Version85(scientists can’t solve problems they created)
Scientific and technological advances are very important in our society. Scientists are not able to give solutions to all the problems they have created. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It can not be denied that great changes have taken place since the Technological Revolution. Thus, our society is changing into a modern one as an impact of scientific and technological advancement. However, during development of our society, scientists have created some serious problems that are not easy for them to tackle.

First and foremost, some of the tough problems are created when scientists deal with other immediate problems. For instance, when an animal or plant was produced by scientists from one cell of another animal or plant which are exactly the same, scientists did not consider that this would create another serious social problem—human cloning, to which people have yet to find solution.

In the second place, there are also some serious matters that emerged during the competitions among nations. Each country wants to govern the whole world and thus some of the powerful nations would probably use nuclear power to threaten others. Therefore, people would no longer exist.

Moreover, it is, sometimes, the scientists that bring about some serious problems which they can not give solution to. When they do the scientific research, they need to try different methods and thus would potentially cause some problems.

It is true that scientists are sometimes helpless confronted with all the problems they created, but they should not stop carrying out research, handling immediate problems in fear of creating more difficulty, because only by dealing with new problems continuously could our society make great progress in science and technology and other field as well.

[ 本帖最后由 djconan 于 2007-8-18 20:36 编辑 ]

forbeckUID: 2297645

你新建一个贴，把作文放在那，留个链接地址就好了~~

yidi mercuryUID: 195299

;d: ;d: 欢迎大家互改哦~~原则上面说版主是不给评作文地。。。。
偶会来关注或者给加芬的好了。。

forbeckUID: 2297645

原则可以稍微调整嘛！;d:

come on~~

forbeckUID: 2297645

已经改了5篇了，晕头转向:funk: ~~大家来帮忙啊:handshake

67169619UID: 2320695

原帖由 H-Kevin 于 2007-8-18 20:05 发表
lz不仅粘贴联接，而且还会帮助大家改作文， 大家赶紧进来发帖子 ;d:

建议加精:)

forbeckUID: 2297645

没改几篇，加了精华才丢人:funk:

67169619UID: 2320695

:funk:   那我也不敢

:)

67169619UID: 2320695

原帖由 djconan 于 2007-8-18 20:34 发表
改一下，这样大家眼睛不会太难受:)

Version85(scientists can’t solve problems they created)
Scientific and technological advances are very important in our society. Scientists are not able to ...

It can not be denied that great changes have taken place since the Technological Revolution. Thus, our society is changing into a modern one as an (这里最好用the，因为你是想特指)impact of scientific and technological advancement. However, during development of our society, scientists have created some serious problems that are not easy for them to tackle.

First and foremost, some of the tough problems are created when scientists deal with other immediate problems. For instance, when an （最好来一个new吧？）animal or （这里少了一个冠词a，？）plant was produced by scientists from one cell of another animal or plant which are（你前面用was，这里用are，真的服了你） exactly the same, scientists did not consider that this would create another serious social problem—human cloning, to which people have yet to find solution（？）.

In the second place, there are also some serious matters that emerged during the competitions among nations. Each country wants to govern the whole world and thus some of the powerful nations would probably use nuclear power to threaten others. Therefore, people would no longer exist（你这个也说得太恐怖了吧？）.

Moreover, it is, sometimes, the scientists that bring about some serious problems which they can not give solution（s？） to. When they do the scientific research, they need to try different methods and thus would potentially cause some problems.

It is true that scientists are sometimes helpless confronted with all the problems they created（你这句我就分不清主谓了）, but they should not stop carrying out research（？）, handling immediate problems in fear of creating more difficulty（？）, because only by dealing with new problems continuously could our society make great progress in science and technology and other field （？）as well.（最后一句我又分不清主谓）


1纵观全文，好像都没有你的agree or disagree之类的，
2：第2，3，4段你都是拼命举例子，你好像一点态度也没有表明。
3，最后一段也看不到你鲜明的观点，这可是大忌啊
4，从评分的第一项给分（完成写作任务），你只能得不到5分。
5，打击你了，继续加油哦（纯粹我个人的观点）

djconanUID: 2257634

我这几天都忘了连接了，谢谢斑竹的帮助

forbeckUID: 2297645

斑竹~~~~~~~~你说这一大一小的作文，算是两篇吧:confused: :o
我要什么时候才熬出头啊:mad

67169619UID: 2320695

:lol

H-KevinUID: 2182070

剑桥系列的单本书 4个test  8篇作文  算  一个

你完成 五个 就可以了 :o