作文求拍：Should developing countries promote education?

onlyalpsUID: 208029

Should developing countries concentrate on Improving industrial skills or should they promote education first?
( been interrupped once, finished in 45m )


In a globalization world which we are currently experiencing, two-third of the developing countries in this planet are straggling in catching up with those developed world. For those countries, some think improving industrial skills shall be put in a higher priority, while some agree that promoting education shall be the first step to take. From my perspective, I think education plays a more significant role for a long-term development.

Education includes various kinds of aspects. For those who are already involved in the social development activities, refreshing themselves with new knowledge or trends, learning latest technology, know-how, will help them broaden horizon, develop creativities and innovation which can be used into certain areas to help contribute in the country’s development. It is not difficult to explain why most companies like to send their staffs for trainings before they really start to work in a specific area.

Further more, during any period of human’s history, the magnificent achievements are usually conducted by human, thus People, especially talented people are a necessary in a country’s development, Education does profound benefit to the society by preparing next generations for a long-term development. Training and teaching children from their young ages in a proper way, is establishing a huge database of talented people and intelligent brains for the future. With self-mastered knowledge, those people will continually contribute to the country’s development.

On the other hand, for a developing country, the most possible ways to improve industrial skill usually are turning to those developed countries for help. Those foreigner experts or imported machines may help improve productivity in a certain degree, but usually it has to be paid by an unreasonable expensive price or sacrifice of some rights. At the end, those developing countries usually find instead of benefits themselves, the developed countries are the only winners from this.

Finally as a summarize, to maintain a healthier, long-lasted and really beneficial social development, the developing countries had better put more emphasis on long-term education rather than seeing short profits by improving certain skills.




[ 本帖最后由 onlyalps 于 2007-9-29 23:16 编辑 ]

forbeckUID: 2297645

已经链接了，明天晚上回来改吧~~

onlyalpsUID: 208029

:)   假期开心呀！

futuremanUID: 2327059

Should developing countries concentrate on Improving industrial skills or should they promote education first?
( been interrupped once, finished in 45m )


In a globalization world which we are currently experiencing, two-third of the developing countries in this planet are straggling in catching up with those developed world. For those countries, some think improving industrial skills shall be put in a higher priority, while some agree that promoting education shall be the first step to take. From my perspective, I think education plays a more significant role for a long-term development.

Education includes various kinds of aspects. For those who are already involved in the social development activities, refreshing themselves with new knowledge or trends, learning latest technology, know-how, will help them broaden horizon, develop creativities and innovation which can be used into certain areas to help contribute in the country’s development. It is not difficult to explain why most companies like to send their staffs for trainings before they really start to work in a specific area. [育对个人的作用]

Further more, during any period of human’s history, the magnificent achievements are usually conducted by human, thus People, especially talented people are a necessary in a country’s development, Education does profound benefit to the society by preparing next generations for a long-term development. [你的TS不能写这么长]Training and teaching children from their young ages in a proper way, is establishing a huge database of talented people and intelligent brains for the future. With self-mastered knowledge, those people will continually contribute to the country’s development. [教育对社会的作用]

On the other hand, for a developing country, the most possible ways to improve industrial skill usually are turning to those developed countries for help. Those foreigner experts or imported machines may help improve productivity in a certain degree, but usually it has to be paid by an unreasonable expensive price or sacrifice of some rights. At the end, those developing countries usually find instead of benefits themselves, the developed countries are the only winners from this.[这段说应该怎么工业化，还是工业化的必要性，我觉得你的意思是前者，那么这段就偏题了]

Finally as a summarize, to maintain a healthier, long-lasted and really beneficial social development, the developing countries had better put more emphasis on long-term education rather than seeing short profits by improving certain skills.

你的问题依然在TS,和上一篇没有太大改观. 我好不容易读进去才发现你前两段是分了教育对个人和对社会的作用来写的,我不知道rater会不会有耐心读下去，所以你能不能把TS写的更简单流畅，而不要用长句。我一再强调，把TS写的无比之长，你是得不了高分的。