作文 120 quick decision

qingzi113UID: 2251657

请走过路过的牛牛们帮忙看一下，新鲜出炉的ibt 作文，12.1 就要考虑，尽量多拍啊 ～～～～

120. Decisions can be made quickly, or they can be made after careful thought. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The decisions that people make quickly are always wrong. Use reasons and specific examples to support your opinion.  

It is nature for people to think that quick desicion is equavilent to rush and prudent decision. Personlly, I hold the opinion that decision made quickly are not necessarily wrong. Since it is quitely possible that quick decisions are not rush and prudent.

It is admitted that, under most situation, some quick decisions are out of deep consideration, and thus lead to the wrong result.

Some quick decisions depend on the cumulative experiences, and are with significant meanings.In out daily lives, we can see many experienced one making quick decision which would lead to the right direction,such those human resouce managers who engage in the same career for many years.When they face with a problems of which one to hire, since they alreadly have rich experience in handling with these situations, they can make a quick decision whether the one is suitable in a short time judgement. That is the magic power of rich experience when making a decision.

And there are circumustances that when the affair is really urgent and there are just not enough time to do too much consideration. In this kind of situation, the slow decision ,though maybe made after sound consideration and disscusion, will definetyly result in wrong. Only those who with real courage and wisdom can instant make a right choice. I clearly remember that last year, my mother got into a serious sick suddently in one night. She was so ached and painful that my brother and I had no idea what to do since my father had gone to another city for business.The situation was very urgent. At this time, my brother made a quick decision that we should send my mother to hospital instantly without waiting for my father's  returning. Owe to my brother's bravery and quick decision that my mother was saved from dangerous situation.

As a result ,I can conclude that the decision made quickly may not always wrong.

Word Count: 320

qingzi113UID: 2251657

好心人出来看看啊，
刚改了语法错误的版本

It is nature for people to think that quick decision is equavilent( equivalent ) to rush and imprudent decision. Personally, I hold the opinion that quick decisions are not necessarily wrong. Since it is quite possible that quick decisions are not rush and prudent.

It is admitted that, under most situation, some quick decisions ar enot out of deep consideration, and thus lead to the wrong result.

However, some quick decisions depend on the cumulative experiences, and are with significant meanings. In out daily lives, we can see many experienced one making quick decision which would lead to the right direction, such those human resouce (resource) managers who engage in the same career for many years. When they face with a problems of which one to hire, since they already have rich experience in handling with these situations, they can make a quick decision whether the one is suitable in a short time judgement.(judgment) That is the magic power of rich experience when making a decision.

And there are circumstances that when the affair is really urgent and there are just not enough time to do too much consideration. In this kind of situation, the slow decision, though maybe made after sound consideration and discussion, will definitely (definitely) result in wrong. Only those with real courage and wisdom can instant make a right choice. I clearly remember that last year, my mother got into a sudden serious sick in one night. She was so ached and painful that my brother and I had no idea what to do since my father had gone to another city for business. The situation was very urgent. At this time, my brother made a quick decision that we should send my mother to hospital instantly without waiting for my father's returning. Owe to my brother's bravery and quick decision that my mother was saved from dangerous situation.

As a result ,I can conclude that the decision made quickly may not always wrong.

豆豆～UID: 2378384

Itis nature for people to think that(It is human nature to consider a) quick decision is equivalent to("be equivalent to" is really a good phrase!) (a) rush and imprudent decision. Personally, I hold theopinion that quick decisions are not necessarily wrong. Since it isquite possible that quick decisions are not rush and prudent.

The first sentence in this paragraph is pretty good I think; however, I don't see there any connection between the first two sentences. Maybe you need to add something to make it more coherent, which is utterly required for a good essay. What's more, I don't suggest people use the same word in one paragraph(rush and prudent).

It is admitted that, under most situation, some quick decisions ar enotout of deep consideration, and thus lead to the wrong result.

Since this paragraph is so short that failed to add anything to the whole passage, I'd delete this para.

However, some quick decisions depend on the cumulative experiences, and(thus) are with significant meanings. In out(our) daily lives, we can see manyexperienced one (many ... one? many ... ONES!) making quick decision which would lead to the rightdirection, such those human resource managers who engage inthe same career for many years. When they face with a problems(a problems? a PROBLEM!!) of whichone to hire, since they("they" is actually pretty ambiguous here, it can be referred to either "managers" or "applicants", so try to make it more clear.) already have rich experience in handling withthese situations, they(the same problem as the previous one.) can make a quick decision whether the one issuitable in a short time judgment. That is the magic powerof rich experience when making a decision.

And("And" cannot start a sentence. Use "What's more," instead.) there are circumstances that when the affair is really urgent andthere are just not enough time to do too much consideration. In thiskind of situation, the slow decision, though maybe made after soundconsideration and discussion, will definitely (definitely) result inwrong. Only those with real courage and wisdom can instant make a rightchoice. I clearly remember that last year, my mother got into a suddenserious sick in one night. She was so ached and painful that my brotherand I had no idea what to do since my father had gone to another cityfor business. The situation was very urgent. At this time, my brothermade a quick decision that we should send my mother to hospitalinstantly without waiting for my father's returning. Owe to mybrother's bravery and quick decision that my mother was saved fromdangerous situation.

As a result(This transitional phrase is not used appropriately.), I can conclude that the decision made quickly may not always (be) wrong.

ALL IN ALL:

I think your ability of writing English is relatively apt. You used specific examples to support your ideas and the structure of this essay is well-organized.

However, there may be still more things you need to work on. You may need to write short sentences more often than not, because, observing from your essay, I think the longer sentence you write, the more grammar mistakes you make. So you may need to start to write some short but precise sentences instead. Moreover, you may want to change some of the words keep showing up in your essay.

The rest of your essay is good.

An essay like this may earn a score of 3.5~4 out of 5.