大家看我这篇作文该打多少分

chenruirayUID: 2214447

题目是Nowadays, young people tend to rush into independent. Many of them leave home to study or work while still in their teens. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

There is much discussion as to the advantages and disadvantages of young people tend to leave home to become independent at early ages. IN my point of view this trend has both of them.

Obviously there are many benefits if young people become independent when young. Firstly, this provide them an opportunity to have a close and thorough contact with the real society. They may gradually accumulate their social experience which is essential for them to make sound judgment in their future life. Moreover, after leaving their parents youths have to face and overcome any difficulties by themselves. Therefore, compared with other young people who still live with their parents, it is easier for them to cultivate some good characters like unyielding and brevity.

Nevertheless, it cannot be denied that there are some worrying disadvantages for youths to leave home and become independent too early. First , young people have very limited ability to tell the right and wrong, therefore they are vulnerable when in front of various temptations and bad habits of society. Second , because they are lack of self-control and the proper guide from their parents, those young people may tend to spend time on playing rather then studying or working.

To sum up , just like every coin has two sides, we shall thoroughly analyze the pros and cons before we make the final decision to leave home and become totally independent.

H-KevinUID: 2182070

句子结构不完整，基础语法有问题

5分左右

Mambaの賤UID: 2422461

There is much discussion as to the advantages and disadvantages of young people tend to leave home to become independent at early ages.( 句子语法错误，u can say: there is much discussion on the advantages and the disadvantages of young people who tend to…)  IN my point of view this trend has both of them. ( 我觉得你第一段开段有点奇怪，最好再充实点)

Obviously there are many benefits if young people become independent when young.（when they were young） Firstly, this provide (provides) them an opportunity to have a close and thorough contact with the real society. They may gradually accumulate their social experience which is essential for them to make sound judgment in their future life. Moreover, after leaving their parents youths have to face and overcome any difficulties by themselves. Therefore, compared with other young people who still live with their parents, it is easier for them to cultivate some good characters like unyielding and brevity.

Nevertheless, it cannot be denied that there are some worrying disadvantages for youths to leave home and become independent too early. First , young people have very limited ability to tell the right and wrong, therefore they are vulnerable when in front of various temptations and bad habits of society. Second , because they are lack of self-control and the proper guide from their parents, those young people may tend to spend time on playing rather then studying or working.

To sum up , just like every coin has two sides, we shall thoroughly analyze the pros and cons before we make the final decision to leave home and become totally independent.


没有改全,差不多.6分左右. 有些语法错误需要改正。有点低级那些错误
加油

Mambaの賤UID: 2422461

:o 我们两个给的分差别有点大~哈哈~ LZ听斑竹的~;d:

H-KevinUID: 2182070

分数不是问题，关键是错误要改正 :o

蜻蜓切UID: 201589

估计5，语法错误扣分严重的。有些句子结构口语省略无所谓，但也是省略掉了，写作文省略就会成为语法错误了。基础语法错误扣分很重吧，如果按照以前的标准，现在是不是调整了？

chenruirayUID: 2214447

谢谢各位大虾啊，我作文老是不行很是恼火