Issue83 0806G加速度小组第四次作业大帖

nun318UID: 2205752

:)

雪梦无痕UID: 2447732

TOPIC: ISSUE83 - "Government should preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state, even though these areas are often extremely remote and thus accessible to only a few people."
WORDS: 544          TIME: 00:54:49          DATE: 2008/1/20 15:59:48

Should government preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state? In my viewpoint, the answer is yes, whether the area is remote and thus only accessible to a few people or not.

Admittedly, some people may hold that as for the remote areas, there is no need to spend money and time to protect them from being damaged, after all, they think that who really cares if a wilderness area thousands of miles away from you is being damaged by tsunami or earthquake, they also claim that since the area is accessible to only a few people, it is a waste of the money from the tax payers for only a few people's interests.

On the one hand, the government should spare no effort to preserve the wilderness areas which are accessible to many people. As is known to all that the government represents the majority people in society. It is his obligation to protect the wilderness areas that many people are longing to go for a vocation and so on. For instance, Hawaii, which is famous for its beautiful sunshine beaches, should the wildness of the beaches be damaged by the tourists or natural forces without being preserved, few people will go there for fun and relaxing then, as a result, the city would lose its glorious step by step, many local companies would have to close down, numerous of people would lose their jobs related to tourism. Then demonstrations would take place, and the government might lose its reputation in the local people which was very dangerous for keeping a stable and harmony society. Take all this into consideration; the government should preserve the wilderness areas which are accessible to most people.

One the other hand, the government also shares the responsibilities of keeping the natural state of the wilderness areas remote from the majority of the people in the country. For instance, the forests in remote areas of the country. Our common sense tells us that forests absorb carbon dioxide and give out oxygen which plays a significant role in the existence of humanity in turn. One can hardly imagine what the world would be like if the forests are destroyed; maybe in that case, life will be a vulgar flare amid cool radiance of the stars. Forests are also the habitat of many wild animals such as monkeys, tigers and so on. In history, many animals have died out since the forests are damaged by fires and others reasons and they only exist in our memories nowadays and, what will happen if one day your grander son asks you what a tiger is like when you tell him that because of tigers live in forests in remote areas where we have not paid enough attention to the protection, so it has extinct. The eco-system will also lose its original order if many animals die out due to the damage of the forests which accounts for many natural disasters all around the world.

In sum, I would like to conclude that not only the wilderness areas which can be easily accessed but also the ones which are extremely remote should be well preserved in their natural state if we think twice for the develop of humanity in the future.

雪梦无痕UID: 2447732

占座

loogloogUID: 2447845

我来啦
字有点儿少，下次努力吧。

TOPIC: ISSUE83 - "Government should preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state, even though these areas are often extremely remote and thus accessible to only a few people."
WORDS: 518          TIME: 00:42:53          DATE: 2008-1-20 下午 03:05:19

Are the government should preserve the publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state? Undoubtedly, it is always necessary for the governments to the wilderness areas, for the sake of the interests of offspring, or because of the important function of these wilderness areas on the environment, the culture and the economics.

Firstly, as we all known, the wilderness areas are covered with forests and grass, or be the wetland. Nowadays, the pollution and the wastes are filled with the so-called "cultivated area"--Urban and some of the rural areas. Only are the wilderness areas preserved in the past years as the result of the cost of development and the little number of the local people. Obviously, they are important for the globe climate and the fresh air. For instance, the deforestation of the Rain forests in south America has caused the changes of the climates, such as the temperature arise, and the frequency of storms increasing. Without the Rain forests, the heart the globe climate, can you imagine the world changes after several years. And the Grassland also operates the similar function as the forests, especially in Asia. Just because of the devastation of the Grassland by our human-beings, the sandstorm affects the lives in China, Japan and the other countries. Obviously, the governments should preserve the wilderness areas at any case that they are remote or closed to us.

Furthermore, when talking about the sandstorm, the bloke of development of economics is easier to learn, even restricting the development of the whole country. Twenty years ago, the local people in the southwest of China owns a perfect and beautiful environment comparing to the condition in nowadays, which plays a crucial role in helping them lead to a good lives appliance with the Grassland. However, just because the endless development, the lives become worse as the Grassland disappears. Even they have to leave the grass supporting them for centuries. And because of the sandstorm from the place where the grass disappears, Beijing, the capital of China as well as the economic center in South China, spends too much in preventing sandstorm. And the development of the economic descends as the appearing of the storm due to the worries about the environment of the local from investor. In short, to protecting the wilderness areas is to guard the economics of the country.

Thirdly, the wetland, a type of wilderness areas, is often beautiful places with cultural, historical and educational values. Wetlands can have archaeological, historical, social and spiritual significance. For example, wetlands are often the focal point for human communities and have special social and spiritual importance to Aboriginal people.   Destroying the wetland not only dose cause the disappearance of culture and history, but also does lead to the fights with the Aboriginal people, even the rebellion of the society.

According to the values of the wilderness including the forests, Grassland, wet land, the preservation is undoubted. In order to ensure the health environment the development of economic, the important culture and history even the peace of society, the remote wilderness areas should be preserved by the governments.

loogloogUID: 2447845

占座！

xiayanshadowUID: 2374500

1.        "Government should preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state, even though these areas are often extremely remote and thus accessible to only a few people."
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TOPIC: ISSUE83 - "Government should preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state, even though these areas are often extremely remote and thus accessible to only a few people."
WORDS: 505          TIME: 00:46:39          DATE: 2008-1-20 19:48:11



According to the statement, our government has the responsibility to preserve the publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state, even if these areas are extremely remote and, as a result, accessible to only a few people. I quite agree with this statement because it is probable that only a few people, or even the environment itself can cause considerable damages to these areas, which will result in great losses that our nation will suffer.

To begin with, the wilderness areas are sometimes vulnerable. Only one person is able to do great harm to them. For example, it is not unusual for us to learn from the newspaper that a cigarette which has not been completely put out causes a terrible fire in a forest. What's more, sometimes even a thunder can cause unimaginably huge fires. And once it happens, it will take several days for our nation to put the fire out, which will cost numerous money and human resources, and will also reduce the amount of rare sources contained in these areas. So it is quite necessary for our government to watch over the wilderness areas from time to time.

In addition, there usually exist some rare species and valuable resources which we can make great use of. Firstly, because these wilderness areas are often extremely remote and therefore only a few people can reach there, some rare species may exist there. Consider, the jungles, for example, a great many rare species reside in them. Secondly, lots of natural resources, such as minerals, are stored in these areas, which means that we can make use of them in the future. Therefore our government should preserve these areas in their natural state not only in order to protect the rare species, but also to store the considerable resources we may use in the future.

Finally, the wilderness areas have the function of coordinating the whether of our nation, even of the whole environment in the world, and any damage to them may accompany with serious damage to the whole nation and the whole world. For example, forests in the wilderness areas are able to balance the carbon dioxide, water and other gases in the atmosphere. If a fire destroys a huge area of forest, the atmosphere in our nation will be disturbed greatly, which will affect the economy of our nation by impeding some industries such as tourism, and in the long run, the quality of people's lives will be decreased. What's more, the global temperature may come up owing to the damage. As a consequence, not only our government, but the whole world should pay great attention to the wilderness areas.

In sum, the public owned wilderness areas are important to our nation, even to the whole world, because they provide habitats for rare species and provide us with a plenty of resources. Given the great benefit we can get from them, our government should watch over the publicly owned wilderness areas and, as the statement recommends, keep them in their natural state.

[ 本帖最后由 xiayanshadow 于 2008-1-20 20:17 编辑 ]

jerome_huUID: 2407996

改堕落快乐
According to the statement, ourgovernment has the responsibility to preserve the publicly owned wildernessareas in their natural state, even if these areas are extremely remote and, asa result, accessible to only a few people. I quite agree with this statement because it is probable that onlya few people, or even the environment itself can cause considerable damages tothese areas, which will result in great losses that ournation will suffer./to our nation 这样意思好像明白点，你的那个我能理解，但不知道是不是native

To begin with, the wilderness areas are sometimes vulnerable/ fragile. [Only one person怪怪的] is able to do great harm to them. /改为so easily, the wilderness is damaged .For example, it is not unusual for us to learn/readfrom the newspaper that a cigarette which has not beencompletely put out /ignited stub causes aterrible fire in a forest. What's more, sometimes even a thunder can causeunimaginably huge fires. And once it happens, it willtake several days for our nation to put the fire out, which will cost numerousmoney and human resources, and will also reduce the amount of rare sourcescontained in these areas. So it is quite necessary for our government to watchover the wilderness areas from time to time.不可抗力，是不是偏了点

In addition, there usually exist some rare species and valuable resources whichwe can make great use of. Firstly, because these wilderness areas are oftenextremely remote and therefore only a few people can reach there, some rarespecies may exist there. Consider, the jungles, for example, a great many rarespecies reside in them. Secondly, lots of natural resources, such as mineral resources, are stored/buriedin these areas,  which means thatwe can make use of them in the future. Therefore our government should preservethese areas in their natural state not only in order to protect the rarespecies, but also to store the considerable resources we may use in the future.

Finally, the wilderness areas have the function of coordinating the whether/weather of our nation, even of the wholeenvironment in the world, and any damage to them may accompany with serious damage / dynamic changes in climate [nation wide/ tothe whole nation] and the whole world. ß有点假。。。For example, forests in the wilderness areas are able to balance thecarbon dioxide, water and other gases in the atmosphere. If a fire destroys ahuge area of forest, the atmosphere in our nation will be disturbed greatly,which will affect the economy of our nation by impeding some industries such astourism, and in the long run, the quality of people's lives will be decreased.What's more, the global temperature may come up /raise owingto the damage. As a consequence, not only our government, but the whole worldshould pay great attention to the wilderness areas.

In sum, the public owned wilderness areas are important to our nation, even tothe whole world, because they provide habitats for rare species and provide uswith a plenty of resources. Given the great benefit we can get from them, ourgovernment should watch over the publicly owned wilderness areas and, as thestatement recommends, keep them in their natural state.



According to the statement, our government has the responsibility topreserve the publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state,even if these areas are extremely remote and, as a result, accessibleto only a few people. I quite agree with this statement because it isprobable that only a few people, or even the environment itself cancause considerable damages to these areas, which will result in greatlosses that our nation will suffer.

To begin with, the wilderness areas are sometimes vulnerable. Only oneperson is able to do great harm to them. For example, it is not unusualfor us to learn from the newspaper that a cigarette which has not beencompletely put out causes a terrible fire in a forest. What's more,sometimes even a thunder can cause unimaginably huge fires. And once ithappens, it will take several days for our nation to put the fire out,which will cost numerous money and human resources, and will alsoreduce the amount of rare sources contained in these areas. So it isquite necessary for our government to watch over the wilderness areasfrom time to time.

In addition, there usually exist some rare species and valuableresources which we can make great use of. Firstly, because thesewilderness areas are often extremely remote and therefore only a fewpeople can reach there, some rare species may exist there. Consider,the jungles, for example, a great many rare species reside in them.Secondly, lots of natural resources, such as minerals, are stored inthese areas, which means that we can make use of them in the future.Therefore our government should preserve these areas in their naturalstate not only in order to protect the rare species, but also to storethe considerable resources we may use in the future.

Finally, the wilderness areas have the function of coordinating thewhether of our nation, even of the whole environment in the world, andany damage to them may accompany with serious damage to the wholenation and the whole world. For example, forests in the wildernessareas are able to balance the carbon dioxide, water and other gases inthe atmosphere. If a fire destroys a huge area of forest, theatmosphere in our nation will be disturbed greatly, which will affectthe economy of our nation by impeding some industries such as tourism,and in the long run, the quality of people's lives will be decreased.What's more, the global temperature may come up owing to the damage. Asa consequence, not only our government, but the whole world should paygreat attention to the wilderness areas.

In sum, the public owned wilderness areas are important to our nation,even to the whole world, because they provide habitats for rare speciesand provide us with a plenty of resources. Given the great benefit wecan get from them, our government should watch over the publicly ownedwilderness areas and, as the statement recommends, keep them in theirnatural state.

"Government should preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state, even though these areas are often extremely remote and thus accessible to only a few people."        

   Government should preserve wild life when they explore wilderness areas, while strictly preservation of primeval characters is irrational and unnecessary.  And I suggest a study to manageability of the primeval areas should be conducted before any further exploring.
   
   One of the most successful examples for developing wilderness areas goes to Yellowstone national park. This park is the home to large variety of wildlife including grizzly bears, wolves, bison, and elk. Founded in 1872 in America, a country had not yet seen it centennial, the park was born and development in concept for protecting what they had and finding benefit and enjoyment for the future generations. More than hundred years has pasted, and now the Yellowstone national park consistently protects its wildlife while in the same time serve as a portal to information about culture and natural resources of the USA. What’s more important, there are a lot of children, companied by their family, visit Yellowstone national park to enjoy their vacations and become affiliated with wild animals. This affiliation will grow with age and to be the cherish recollection in their memories.
  
  I understand the worries from environmentalists, that historically evidence shows, in China, the exploring with any wilderness areas were often accompanied with large scale immigration and ended in the vanishing of forest and species diversity. These concerns show a social awareness to our country’s future development. Nevertheless, what I do not understand is the worries from officials and professors, that if the trend continues, some largest wilderness area in China could be in jeopardy and things like that. It is their responsibilities   to protect all development are made under conservation as the scale in Yellowstone national parks.
  
  China has vast pristine areas in the west and far north. In the north area like xinjiang province with terrestrial heat, I suggest a study to manageability of the primeval areas should be conducted before any further exploring.  There are, perhaps, many improvements, including developed geothermal streams, reservoirs, and aqueduct  , can help stimulating local economy without affecting the diversity of wild life.

  While the western China, with magnificent mountain ranges, remote rivers and deep valleys densely populated by goats, wolves and birds, is to be surrounded by a vast buffer zone where limited development can take place under strict guidelines. Significant amounts of natural gas have been discovered in the buffer zone. Moreover, the western area is also said to be fluid with mineral resource and had been served as foundation to country’s stocking raising industry. It was suggested that with a cautiously set plan, development could give impetus to one of the largest and most important wilderness areas in west China.  Environmental groups will see the action as a model for large-scale progress; industry leaders provide its provisions for a blooming development and the creation of jobs.

  Therefore, I suggest government should set up positive plans in developing the wilderness areas , with benefits either to our knowledge base of wildlife protection, or to country ‘s  economics development.

[ 本帖最后由 jerome_hu 于 2008-1-20 22:11 编辑 ]

xiayanshadowUID: 2374500

Are the government（第一句話還是盡量別出現語法錯誤吧~。~！Do the government） should preserve the publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state? Undoubtedly, it is always necessary for the governments(去掉s) to (缺了个动词)the wilderness areas, for the sake of the interests of offspring, or because of （去掉because of）the important function of these wilderness areas on the environment, the culture and the economics.

Firstly, as we all known(know), the wilderness areas are covered with forests and grass, or be the wetland. Nowadays, the pollution and the wastes are filled with（这里主谓写反了。。。应该是areas are filled with pollution） the so-called "cultivated area"--Urban and some of the rural areas. Only are the wilderness areas preserved in the past years as the result of the cost of development and the little(small) number of the local people. Obviously, they are important for the globe climate and the fresh air. For instance, the deforestation of the Rain forests in south America has caused the changes of the climates, such as the temperature arise, and the frequency of storms increasing（such as the rise of temperature and the increasing frequency of storms）. Without the Rain forests, the heart(???) the globe climate, can you imagine the world changes after several years.(can you 应该是问号吧) And the Grassland also operates the similar function as the forests, especially in Asia. Just because of the devastation of the Grassland by our human-beings（human-beings是指的全人类，换成citizens in China好一些） the sandstorm affects the lives in China, Japan and the other countries. Obviously, the governments should preserve the wilderness areas at any case that they(把that they 改成which) are remote or closed to us.

Furthermore, when talking about the sandstorm, the bloke of development of economics is easier to learn（to be learned）, even restricting the development of the whole country(你想表达的是sandstorm阻碍了发展吧，但是这句话的主语不是sandstorm，而是the block of development of economics). Twenty years ago, the local people in the southwest of China owns a perfect and beautiful environment comparing to the condition in nowadays, which plays a crucial role in helping them lead to a good lives appliance with the Grassland. However, just because (because of)the endless development, the lives become worse as the Grassland disappears. Even they have to(They even have to) leave the grass supporting them for centuries. And because of the sandstorm from the place where the grass disappears, Beijing, the capital of China as well as the economic center in South China, spends too much (money) in preventing sandstorm. And the development of the economic descends as the appearing of the storm due to the worries about the environment of the local from investor(???). In short, to protecting(to protect,或者protecting) the wilderness areas is to guard the economics（单数） of the country.

Thirdly, the wetland, a type of wilderness areas(单数), is often beautiful places with cultural, historical and educational values. Wetlands can have archaeological, historical, social and spiritual significance. For example, wetlands are often the focal point for human communities and have special social and spiritual importance to Aboriginal people.   Destroying the wetland not only dose cause the disappearance of culture and history, but also does lead to the fights with the Aboriginal people, even the rebellion of the society.（Destroying the wetland not only cause the disappearance of culture and history, but also lead to the…）

According to the values of the wilderness including the forests, Grassland, wet land, the preservation is undoubted. In order to ensure the health environment the development of economic, the important culture and history even the peace of society(culture, history, and even the peace of society), the remote wilderness areas should be preserved by the governments.

建议每一段的第一句话都是改段的中心句，比如第三段就比较好，一来就说明这一段要说的是经济问题，但是第二段和第四段就不是那么对劲了，特别是第二段，只描述了这些地方包括雨林之类的东西，我觉得应该再在这句话里强调一下这些雨林对于生态的重要性。总之要尽量让改作文的人只看首尾段和中间三段的第一句话就能明白你作文的意思。
另外注意一下全文的单数和复数，还有even的用法，尽量少一些语法错误

[ 本帖最后由 xiayanshadow 于 2008-1-20 21:12 编辑 ]

loogloogUID: 2447845

TOPIC: ISSUE83 - "Government should preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state, even though these areas are often extremely remote and thus accessible to only a few people."
WORDS: 544          TIME: 00:54:49          DATE: 2008/1/20 15:59:48

Should government preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state? In my viewpoint, the answer is yes, whether the area is remote and thus only accessible to a few people or not.

Admittedly, some people may hold that as for the remote areas, there is no need to spend money and time to protect(in protecting) them from being damaged,(.) after all, they think that who really cares if a wilderness area thousands of miles away from you is being damaged by tsunami or earthquake, they also claim that since the area is accessible to only a few people, it is a waste of the money from the tax payers for only a few people's interests.(这一段没有论证把，只列举了一下别人的观点，那你接下来应该论证为什么要保护偏远地区，然后再递进，not only the remote wilderness nut also the adjacent one..... 要不然衔接不好）

On the one hand, the government should spare no effort to preserve the wilderness areas which are accessible to many people. As is known to all that the government represents the（interests of ） majority people in society. It is his obligation to protect the wilderness areas that many people are longing to go for a vocation and so on. For instance, Hawaii, which is famous for its beautiful sunshine beaches, should(if) the wildness of the beaches be(are) damaged by the tourists or natural forces without being preserved, few people will go there for fun and relaxing then, as a result, the city would lose its glorious step by step, many local companies would have to close down, (and)numerous of (去掉of )people would lose their jobs related to tourism. Then demonstrations(???) would take place, and the government might lose its reputation (within)in the local people, which was very dangerous for keeping a stable and harmony society. Take all this into consideration; the government should preserve the wilderness areas which are accessible to most people.

One the other hand, the government also shares the responsibilities of keeping the natural state of the wilderness areas remote from the majority of the people in the country. For instance, the forests in remote areas of the country. Our common sense tells us that forests absorb carbon dioxide and give out oxygen which plays a significant role in the existence of humanity in turn. One can hardly imagine what the world would be like if the forests are destroyed; maybe in that case, life will be a vulgar flare amid cool radiance of the stars. Forests are also the habitat of many wild animals such as monkeys, tigers and so on. In history, many animals have died out since the forests are damaged by fires and others reasons and they only exist in our memories nowadays and(我觉得应该强调人力因素，毕竟自然太难战胜，而且应该更深一步), what will happen if one day your grander son asks you what a tiger is like when you tell him that because of tigers live in forests in remote areas where we have not paid enough attention to the protection, so it has extinct.(这里面很乱，用一个递进好些吧In history, many animals have died out and exist in our memories nowadays ， since the forests are damaged by fires and others reasons . Moreover, if one day your grander son asks you the apperance of tiger, what will happen, when you tell him that because of tigers live in remote forests where we have not paid enough attention to the protection, so it has extinct.) The eco-system will also lose its original order if many animals die out due to the damage of the forests which accounts for many natural disasters all around the world.

In sum, I would like to conclude that not only the wilderness areas which can be easily accessed but also the ones which are extremely remote should be well preserved in their natural state if we think twice for the develop of humanity in the future.
总体觉得论证不够有力，有时觉得比较牵强！还有就是衔接问题！

lilumiluUID: 2332310

word:572     ps：补上了，如果给我改了，请qq上给我发个信吧，谢谢

The arguer asserts that government should preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in natural state, which I strongly agree with. It is ridiculous to consider that the wilderness areas are useless because they are remote and accessible to only a few people. Contrarily, they are more and more important for human's existence on the planet. As we know, more and more wilderness areas have disappeared over last decades, according to which human should stress more emphases on natural areas protection.

With the development of civilization, the environmental problem is beginning to threaten to end human life on our planet. If allowing the wilderness areas evolve with time, the wilderness areas will be damaged by human's behavior soon or later, which play a negative impact on local environment. The typical example is deforestation. There is a figurative saying: forest is the lung of the earth. With the increasing human's deforestation, more and more carbon dioxide cannot transform into oxygen but stay in the air. Furthermore, the Greenhouse Effect would be serious due to the growth number of carbon dioxide in the air, which leads to a raising temperature. At that time, people would not only suffer from the heat in summer, but also face the danger of the increasing sea level caused by the thawy ice in South Pole. That is what we do not want to see. Therefore, it is necessary for the government to preserve publicly owned wilderness areas.

In addition, no one can deny the basic fact that there are many rare species in wilderness areas in a natural state. It is obvious that if government fails to take measures to protect those wilderness areas, the rare species, without their habitat, must die out and only can be remembered in textbooks. Since millions of species have died out in past several hundred years, the protection of wilderness areas is necessary. Besides the reason for keeping more species on earth, there are others reasons that the variety of life contributes directly to enhance the quality of human. Some animals or plants can sever for human. As we know, every life on the planet has its enemy. When human encounter some problems caused by certain animals or plants which is hard to deal with, it is a convenient method to limit it with their enemy. Therefore, one more kind of living, one more choice for human. Furthermore, the development on biology technology, human can study the gene. More styles of life is leading to more kinds of gene, which should benefit human in some time.

However, more measures should be taken by the government as being the supplement to preservation of the natural areas. For the goal of keeping the wilder areas, it is also important that pay attention on education and propaganda. For example, the education authorities would set courses on environment for students in order to tell them the important role those wilderness areas playing in our life. What's more, we would propagandize and educate residents to obtain their support to the decision about wilderness areas protection.

In sum, with the increasing numbers of wilderness areas, the left natural areas will play a more and more important role on human's life. In addition to this fact, the government should take strong measures to preserve them as soon as possible. And if the government is blind to the importance of those area, they will pay a heavy price which we cannot afford.