Issue150 [Jet小姐]第五次作业

michaelxuywUID: 2330197

ISSUE150- "Because of television and worldwide computer connections, people cannow become familiar with a great many places that they have nevervisited. As a result, tourism will soon become obsolete."

Intoday's world, a great many resources of the traveling resorts aremade available to us through the television and expand of the Internet,and we can preview the scenery for free. However, I believe that traveling will alway be the optimal choice when people want toexperience the world, and the internet and television serves as goodsupplements.

Traveling is the best way to satisfy our curiosityof a place where we have never been, and it offers an unique,superior experience which we can hardly enjoy by other means.One friend of mine, who just came back from Australia, told us abouthis great journey: enjoying the pleasing sunshine, walking on thebeautiful beach and tasting the delicious sea food, he thinks everypenny spent was worthwhile. In addition, some people keep on travelingto one place not because they  haven't been there before, but for thereason that they don't like to stay home. When summer comes, forinstance, my uncle always spends several weeks traveling north in thecountry for he could not stand the sizzling day in his hometown.

Onthe contrary, watching television programs or clicking to browse theinformation of the traveling sites provides us little satisfaction andwe are not likely to have interesting stories to share with ourfriends.  A picture taken from the top of a mountain is unable toprovide the feeling of the breeze, the sound of the birds, the smellsof the flowers, or perhaps the satisfaction of climbing up a highmountain. Just like that we can hardly believe a broadcast of a tennismatch ontelevision will pull all the spectators out of the stadium, we can'timagine that traveling will be substituted by watching television orsurfing on the net.

However, the information we can get at homeserver as good introduction before we go there or as supplementarymaterial when it is unable for us to go there by ourselves. Forexample, we can manage our journey effectively if the locations ofthe sites or the cost of the trip is available to us. Sometimes,because of the bad weather or other forbidding reason, these materialis only way that we can get familiar with the places. For example,watching old pictures or documentaries about the World Trade Tower isonly means through which I can "visit" the tower.

Traveling ismore than slides of photographs or description texts we can get fromtelevision or Internet, it is an unique experience of the life,atmosphere and people at another place of the world. Our travelingexperience will give the photographs more great memories and moreinteresting stories which we can share with our friends.

Silvan_luanUID: 2374352

Intoday's world, a great many resources of the traveling resorts aremade (有必要吗?)available to us through the television and expand of the Internet,and we can preview the scenery for free. However, I believe that traveling will alway be the optimal choice when people want toexperience the world, and the internet and television serves as goodsupplements.

Traveling is the best way to satisfy our curiosityof a place where we have never been, and it offers an unique,superior experience which we can hardly enjoy by other means.One friend of mine, who just came back from Australia, told us abouthis great journey: enjoying the pleasing sunshine, walking on thebeautiful beach and tasting the delicious sea food, he thinks everypenny spent was worthwhile. In addition, some people keep on travelingto one place not because they  haven't been there before, but for thereason that they don't like to stay home. When summer comes, forinstance, my uncle always spends several weeks traveling north in thecountry for he could not stand the sizzling day in his hometown.(似乎缺少对电脑和电视的比较优势)

Onthe contrary, watching television programs or clicking to browse theinformation of the traveling sites provides us little satisfaction andwe are not likely to have interesting stories to share with ourfriends.  A picture taken from the top of a mountain is unable toprovide the feeling of the breeze, the sound of the birds, the smellsof the flowers, or perhaps the satisfaction of climbing up a highmountain. (好句子)Just like that we can hardly believe a broadcast of a tennismatch ontelevision will pull all the spectators out of the stadium, we can'timagine that traveling will be substituted by watching television orsurfing on the net.

However, the information we can get at homeserver as good introduction before we go there or as supplementarymaterial when it is unable for us to go there by ourselves. Forexample, we can manage our journey effectively if the locations ofthe sites or the cost of the trip is available to us. Sometimes,because of the bad weather or other forbidding reason, these materialis only way that we can get familiar with the places. For example,watching old pictures or documentaries about the World Trade Tower isonly means through which I can "visit" the tower.

Traveling ismore than slides of photographs or description texts we can get fromtelevision or Internet, (缺少连接词,算是重大语法错误)it is an unique experience of the life,atmosphere and people at another place of the world. Our travelingexperience will give the photographs (这个GIVE的动词和病与搭配有问题)more great memories and moreinteresting stories which we can share with our friends.


还是we ,you ,I太多
新东方说这样不好

ilabcUID: 2298724

结构清晰，没有什么语法错误。
可能因为限时把，你的好多单词没有用空格分开，看得有点吃力。
你的分论点展开不够。1，2个分论点在逻辑上其实是一个，一个说travelling好，一个说通过TV，internet不好。就感觉理由不够多。看到 on the contrary的时候我以为你的观点要变了，后来发现是和上面一样的。这样的话其实你应该把2段并在一起，否则会引起误会。我一开始就弄错了。

个人意见，说错了不要介意。